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Matt Nelson, boy genius.

By 8 February 2013 48

i will get you

Dear Matt,

I was young once, I know how hard it can be when you are trying to work out what girls are about.  Obviously Abbey did something to upset you, maybe she put chewing gum in your hair, dropped your mobile phone in the loo, or kissed another boy. Or maybe she just wouldn’t let you put your hand inside her bra, we don’t know. So you decided to extract your revenge. Ok, not what most real men would do, but if that’s your choice, have at it.

However, you made one fundamental mistake.

How can I put thsi Matt? Writing your intent to “get” Abbey, on the wall of a busy office block, in two foot high letters, on a busy cycle path, behind the police station, probably wasn’t the cleverest of ideas, was it? You do know  now that if any harm does befall Abbey, (we hope none does, obviously,) you will not only be the prime suspect, but there will also be evidence “written in stone” so to speak.

Pretty dumb move Matt. I’d go as far as to say, that is world class stupidity with bells on, and sprinkles.

Yours sincerely,
Ben

PS. It’s “you’re” as in “you are”, not “your”. Paying attention in school may have been a bit wiser than you gave credence too.

[Ed - Got an image of Canberra you want to share with the world? Email it in to images@the-riotact.com ]

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48 Responses to
Matt Nelson, boy genius.
Duffbowl 2:58 pm
08 Feb 13
#31

Ben_Dover said :

tim_c said :

“PS. It’s “you’re” as in “you are”, not “your”. Paying attention in school may have been a bit wiser than you gave credence too.”

PS. It’s “to”, not “too”.

You think so? I’m not sure? Any other grammar pedants on here?

Sorry, Ben, tim_c is correct. You’re suggesting that they should have given credence to their education. “Too” just doesn’t work.

Solidarity 3:21 pm
08 Feb 13
#32

Maybe Matt Nelson is some sort of dog trainer, and Abby is a canine who thinks she is people? It can be quite annoying when your dog doesn’t know not to sit at the breakfast table etc

Pork Hunt 3:22 pm
08 Feb 13
#33

poetix said :

Deref said :

How many Matt Nelsons are there?

Sounds like a wrestling hold.

Reminds me of the catholic school wrestling joke. They had the full nelson, half nelson and father nelson…

Ben_Dover 3:43 pm
08 Feb 13
#34

Then I accept that correction. Live and learn eh?

Ben_Dover 3:45 pm
08 Feb 13
#35

Sorry, my reply was in response to the quote below.

Duffbowl said :

Ben_Dover said :

tim_c said :

“PS. It’s “you’re” as in “you are”, not “your”. Paying attention in school may have been a bit wiser than you gave credence too.”

PS. It’s “to”, not “too”.

You think so? I’m not sure? Any other grammar pedants on here?

Sorry, Ben, tim_c is correct. You’re suggesting that they should have given credence to their education. “Too” just doesn’t work.

Pitchka 3:47 pm
08 Feb 13
#36

Hi OP, whilst we are correcting grammar/spelling, i noted this small typo…

“How can I put thsi Matt?” I believe the spelling is infact THIS.

So if you are going to correct someone, be sure that your spelling is flawless.

dpm 3:49 pm
08 Feb 13
#37

Solidarity said :

Maybe Matt Nelson is some sort of dog trainer, and Abby is a canine who thinks she is people? It can be quite annoying when your dog doesn’t know not to sit at the breakfast table etc

HAHAHA! Awesome explanation! It all makes perfect sense now! :-)

bundah 3:59 pm
08 Feb 13
#38

@ Ben Dover

See what happens when you highlight a grammar error and you inadvertently bugger it up all the fusstedious gwamma nazi(‘)s are only tooooo happy to bend-u-over and ram it home!

Jivrashia 4:40 pm
08 Feb 13
#39

bundah said :

See what happens when you highlight a grammar error and you inadvertently bugger it up

*nod*

Couple of things to remember when posting on the internet.

1. Goodwin’s Law
2. Muphry’s Law
3. Rule 36. NO EXCEPTIONS.The internet is a happy and safe place.

Deref 4:42 pm
08 Feb 13
#40

Disregarding the spelling and grammar, even punctuation would have helped.

Punctuation’s important. It’s the difference between helping your uncle, Jack, off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.

poetix 5:06 pm
08 Feb 13
#41

Pitchka said :

So if you are going to correct someone, be sure that your spelling is flawless.

(-:

Excellent advice. Though it would mean no-one would ever correct anyone, and that would be tragic. (I so wanted to write trajic, but I just couldn’t.)

Tetranitrate 7:25 pm
08 Feb 13
#42

Jivrashia said :

bundah said :

See what happens when you highlight a grammar error and you inadvertently bugger it up

*nod*

Couple of things to remember when posting on the internet.

1. Goodwin’s Law
2. Muphry’s Law
3. Rule 36. NO EXCEPTIONS.The internet is a happy and safe place.

Uh actually it’s rule 34.

poetix 9:00 pm
08 Feb 13
#43

Ah, semiotics! Can’t live with it, can’t live without it.

That’s Saussure.

LSWCHP 9:44 pm
08 Feb 13
#44

Deref said :

Disregarding the spelling and grammar, even punctuation would have helped.

Punctuation’s important. It’s the difference between helping your uncle, Jack, off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.

Come on Deref, admit it, you’ve been waiting for that opening for a long time, haven’t you? :-)

X71 9:33 pm
09 Feb 13
#45

You’re all missing the point. It’s an ingenious ad for Subaru.

Deref 8:41 am
10 Feb 13
#46

LSWCHP said :

Deref said :

Disregarding the spelling and grammar, even punctuation would have helped.

Punctuation’s important. It’s the difference between helping your uncle, Jack, off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.

Come on Deref, admit it, you’ve been waiting for that opening for a long time, haven’t you? :-)

Yes. Yes I have. :D

Ben_Dover 9:17 am
10 Feb 13
#47

Ben_Dover said :

@ Ben Dover

See what happens when you highlight a grammar error and you inadvertently bugger it up all the fusstedious gwamma nazi(‘)s are only tooooo happy to bend-u-over and ram it home!

Poetic justice one would have to believe, as I am a grammar nazi by inclination myself. Though it does one good to have an error eviscerated every so often, it keeps one’s feet on the ground.

astrojax 5:22 pm
14 Feb 13
#48

or it could be: abby: your [sic] a dog and i’m going to get [you] matt nelson

so it could be matt who is grave fear of his wellbeing from the disgruntled abby…

or it may be just art? how much did katy’s team spend on this, and what universal mesage does it convey? is it a covert cry for attention, to bring into relief the cry for help of those without voices? or is it a reference to the power of some sectors of the community over others – represdnted here by gender inequality and so obviously a reference to ‘reclaim the night’ movements (not that the night wass ever ‘claimed’, so how one could ‘re-claim it is a mystery and perhaps this is obliquely and witily referenced in this genius work) and these are all ironically portrayed as graffiti to depict the only way the voiceless of the community can have a say on issues of importance to them, particulalry youth culture. yet violence is rife at all strata of the community, including the aged, so this is another wry depiction of the issue – a very cunning work and one on which our $230,000 is well spent.

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