1 October 2010

Salesmen call it "Leading The Pig"

| johnboy
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Have a look at this ad for The Apartments in New Acton.

Reminds me a bit of the way Debacle used to have a sign out the front saying IIRC: “If you like Carlton Draft the Civic Pub is just down the road”.

New Acton Apartments Ad

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Woody Mann-Caruso said :

“If you want to see the Katie Bender memorial from your couch, these are the apartments for you.”

that made me snigger. then i felt bad. thank you for some amusement, albeit guilt-laden, on a hungover saturday afternoon.

Would be amusing to tell the staff at Debacle that any self-respecting drinker wouldn’t want to be seen in a bar where they don’t know how to spell ‘draught’, as in draught beer

arescarti42 said :

landcat said :

I think there is enough government housing in Canberra to last to 2030.

Which would explain why people assessed as in “high need” of public housing wait on average a little under 1.5 years before getting public housing. Take note, that’s an AVERAGE wait, some people undoubtedly have to wait longer.

Yep, there must be an absolute abundance of public housing.

don’t forget “emergency housing” at ainslie village – at this time of year makes me think of a christmas carol by charles dickens –

“At this festive season of the year, Mr. Scrooge,” said the gentleman, taking up a pen, “it is more than usually desirable that we should make some slight provision for the Poor and Destitute, who suffer greatly at the present time. Many thousands are in want of common necessaries; hundreds of thousands are in want of common comforts, sir.”
“Are there no prisons?” asked Scrooge.
“Plenty of prisons,” said the gentleman, laying down the pen again.
“And the Union workhouses?” demanded Scrooge. “Are they still in operation?”
“They are. Still,” returned the gentleman, “I wish I could say they were not.”
“The Treadmill and the Poor Law are in full vigour, then?” said Scrooge.
“Both very busy, sir.”
“Oh! I was afraid, from what you said at first, that something had occurred to stop them in their useful course,” said Scrooge. “I’m very glad to hear it.”

waiting for common ground to come to canberra – then maybe we will see a better change for the homeless and low income earners, and justify the belief of a few that the ACT Government’s housing supply is going to last till 2030…

Who made the ad? Was it Zoo?

georgesgenitals3:09 pm 05 Oct 10

I’ve never understood why anybody with $1million to spare on property would spend that money in Canberra…it makes no sense.

maybe, just maybe, and I’m going out on a crazy limb here, but just maybe some people like living here.

Depends on what the $1M is buying. It might be buying a small block of units, or a house (or 2), or commercial property.

I meet all the criteria put forth by the ads, I live in an apartment, and I could probably find some idiot banker who’d lend me the money… but it feels like they’re insulting my intelligence, so the strategy isn’t working on me. Obviously the “oblivious, rich wanker” market is larger than I’d previously thought.

troll-sniffer10:42 am 05 Oct 10

Looking at the above posts the ad is doing everything that was intended, weeding out the bogans and the wannabes before they even put a foot in the agent’s door.

The developers and builders of this complex have been specific in their intent to build a top class residential precinct. It seems at this stage that they are succeeding. A bunch of wannabes and cashed up bogans moving into the complex would be detrimental to the overall success and desirability of the project.

Seems clever advertising is too clever for most.

CraigT said :

@Grail – the “filthy rich bastards” who move in here will be the same kind of idiots who build those tasteless monstruosities at O’Malley, in other words they probably can’t even spell “University” let alone reconnect with any University roots.

You must admit: there’s a delicious irony in belittling those without university degrees while at the same time criticising allegedly pretentious wankers.

And what’s with the capital “U” for University? Is it a religion for you?

@Grail – the “filthy rich bastards” who move in here will be the same kind of idiots who build those tasteless monstruosities at O’Malley, in other words they probably can’t even spell “University” let alone reconnect with any University roots.

I’ve never understood why anybody with $1million to spare on property would spend that money in Canberra…it makes no sense.

justin heywood4:23 pm 02 Oct 10

The next line in th ad could be:

“If you’re the kind of person who needs an ad agency to tell you what ‘classy’ is, then these are the apartments for you”

Imagine it. 16 floors of pretentious bores and a basement full of second-hand BMWs.

cleo said :

How about the government buy some of these apartments for government housing.

I’ve thought for some time that the government should make it a condition of every large development application, that a small percentage of dwellings get handed over to public housing. One flat out of each block like this would be great.

Not just another block of flats – a block of flats specifically designed for wankers!

How about the government buy some of these appartments for government housing.

landcat said :

I think there is enough government housing in Canberra to last to 2030.

Which would explain why people assessed as in “high need” of public housing wait on average a little under 1.5 years before getting public housing. Take note, that’s an AVERAGE wait, some people undoubtedly have to wait longer.

Yep, there must be an absolute abundance of public housing.

Woody Mann-Caruso7:11 pm 01 Oct 10

Thus the “special” value of filet mignonis that is it a tiny, overpriced piece of meat.

An Antarean parakeet gland stuck on a small stick is a revolting but much sought after cocktail delicacy and very large sums of money are often paid for them by very rich idiots who want to impress other very rich idiots.

banjo said :

When I drive by at night I am curious why one of the rooms near the very top has blue and pink lights coming out of it when all the rest are normal white light…

I noticed that at Floriade Nightfest about a week ago, at first I thought someone had a TV on in one of the apartments, but then I noticed that without exception they’re all empty. I can only assume the blue and pink highlight is part of their artsy advertising campaign.

creative_canberran5:59 pm 01 Oct 10

I’m sold, where do I get my lease!

When I drive by at night I am curious why one of the rooms near the very top has blue and pink lights coming out of it when all the rest are normal white light…

I think the ApARTments look awesome.

The ad is very clever, from a highly targeted marketing perspective (they aren’t trying to appeal to everyone).

I would LOVE to buy one.

…. Pity I can’t afford it. 🙁

arescarti42 said :

landcat said :

Canberra DOES need more developments that actually make this town look like a city, and will add value to the place instead of putting up more foul government housing.
LandCAt

Because the poor don’t deserve a place to live, right?

There’s a bunch of units from this complex up on allhomes at the moment, 3 bedroom units are listed from $1.1 to $1.8 million. For comparison, there is currently a brand new 5 bedroom house on a 1200 metre square block about 1.5km away listed for $1.65 million.

I like how a lot of the ApARTment allhomes listings have “close to the ANU” mentioned in them. I wonder how many students or lecturers have a lazy $1.5 million spare to buy one of these units.

I think there is enough government housing in Canberra to last to 2030.

The benefits from this development will be passed on to students working in the coffee shops around the apartments.

The overall effect to the Canberra economy will far outstrip anything that can be done by further Government housing developments. A heathy economy will create jobs and hence create tax revenue for efforts to Centerlink and other needs for the poor.

@neanderthalsis: the point of filet mignon is that it is a tiny portion of the cow and is thus hideously expensive meat, and requires skilled cooks to get it right (and thus, is hideously expensive to prepare properly). Thus the “special” value of filet mignonis that is it a tiny, overpriced piece of meat.

@arescarti42: being “close to the ANU” means the filthy rich bastards who will end up living there can pretend that they’re somehow “reconnecting with their roots” as an impoverished student (you know, back in the days when Mum and Dad could only afford to buy them a new Audi every third year).

@johnboy: The “shuffle up effect” is exactly the same as the “trickle down effect”. That is to say, a creative fiction invented by the rich people to help us poor folk feel better about ourselves. These apartments might attract some rich people from Sydney or Melbourne who are posted or seconded to Canberra. I don’t see many people from Canberra in a hurry to move into million dollar closets.

landcat said :

Canberra DOES need more developments that actually make this town look like a city, and will add value to the place instead of putting up more foul government housing.
LandCAt

Because the poor don’t deserve a place to live, right?

There’s a bunch of units from this complex up on allhomes at the moment, 3 bedroom units are listed from $1.1 to $1.8 million. For comparison, there is currently a brand new 5 bedroom house on a 1200 metre square block about 1.5km away listed for $1.65 million.

I like how a lot of the ApARTment allhomes listings have “close to the ANU” mentioned in them. I wonder how many students or lecturers have a lazy $1.5 million spare to buy one of these units.

No but the rich moving into places like this creates a shuffle effect. (Freeing up space in the overall market)

But not every project is supposed to suit everyone’s needs and this one is very obviously not aimed at everyone.

The building itself is nice. In fact, that whole area is nice. New Acton and the ANU Exchange are tow areas of Canberra that have improved significantly over the last couple of years. Unfortunately the ad is pretentious and doesn’t sell it well.

neanderthalsis3:19 pm 01 Oct 10

No real man would order a fillet mignon, let alone a well done one. It’s a tiny, over priced bit of meat, no marbling and low in flavour.

JessicaNumber2:56 pm 01 Oct 10

I have never ordered a whatever that dish was and have always enjoyed smooches with someone special (although not on railway tracks), so maybe those are the apartments for me!

MWAH!

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

“If you want to see the Katie Bender memorial from your couch, these are the apartments for you.”

Absolute pisser.

I think the ad is great, place all the wankers in the one concentrated area. Sort of like San Fransico in South Park. Smug clouds and all.

Chaz said :

hooray for more overpriced/tiny apartments

canberra sure needs more of those

Umm… have you even seen the apartments?

The artwork in this development is amazing. Canberra DOES need more developments that actually make this town look like a city, and will add value to the place instead of putting up more foul government housing.

This is one of Canberra’s first residential 6 star building, maybe we should look at these apartments as the way forward in this town instead of bitching about the Ad.

LandCAt

Woody Mann-Caruso2:33 pm 01 Oct 10

“If you want to see the Katie Bender memorial from your couch, these are the apartments for you.”

whilst the ad is clever, i think it would only appeal to people who are new to Canberra and yet to discover how appalling the apartment construction industry is in this town. eg. Bovis’s Gateway Apartments on Kingston Foreshore which were originally marketed as the new benchmark for quality and taste in Canberra but have, ever since, mired all occupants in litigation with Bovis to compensate for structural problems cause by their shoddy workmanship.

They should have got me to do the ad. Would have been a lot quicker and dare I say, cheaper too.

“If you are a wanker, you will love the Apartments”

Clever add – the only people they’ll alienate were never prospective buyers anyway.

Also … what’s the point of having a steak if you’re going to turn it into charcoal?

johnboy said :

How do you have your steak?

Burnt to a crisp…

hooray for more overpriced/tiny apartments

canberra sure needs more of those

Makes me think that the residents will have nightly masterb….. well you get the idea…
It does not convince me to part with my money for the next 20 odd years, it does nothing to state what I can expect if I move in… It doesn’t even make me curious about the place…

How do you have your steak?

I skip/fast forward/mute ads on the occasions I watch TV.

I have seen this ad a few times, but ironically, this is the first time I have actually listened to the audio.

Are their sunlit railway tracks as part of the new development?

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