I was sitting outside Woden Plaza yesterday enjoying a cold drink and just watching the world go by.
I noticed a boy about 7 years old walking down a flight of stairs from the car park. His father (I assume) briskly walked past him and slapped him so hard across the back of the head that it made quite a loud sound which shocked me. The boy started to cry of course and just stood there while his father walked across the street and in to the shops with the meanest look I’ve seen in quite some time but no other reaction whatsoever.
Shortly afterwards the kids mother (again I’m assuming) came down the stairs behind him with a baby and younger boy in tow and yelled, ‘that’s what you get for being a naughty boy’ dragging him down the stairs with the rest of them. Just as they walked in front of me the older boy turned around and punched his little brother very hard obviously still quite upset which Mum ignored.
I have no idea what went on to cause this domestic but I can honestly say that if that kid gets slapped like that on a regular basis then I think he’s going to end up physically injured, not to mention the psychological impact. All I could think at the time was, ‘no wonder so many kids end up in such a mess’.
I left feeling quite helpless and sad.
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The upside is that with some parental discipline he may learn to respect authority and not end up a hoodie wearing thug robbing people and stealing cars. +1 for responsibe parenting.
Probably more effective than putting him on the naughty step
“I left feeling quite helpless and sad.” boo hoo.
It’s none of your business.
I saw a kid get smacked and thought I should complain on the internet to absolve my guilt for doing nothing at the time. Where can I collect my humanitarian prize?
Diggety said :
+1, there needs to be more of this. We live in a society now where children are wrapped on cotton wool and dont get to learn things for themselves. Bring back the cane i say.
I don’t agree with the posts proclaiming guilt inspired Internet posting.
But I will say that some people just shouldn’t be allowed to have kids.
eyeLikeCarrots said :
You talking about the OP or the person in his story?
I know when I was younger, if I did something wrong, I got yelled at, did it again, got a smack, go back and do it a third time, I got a spanking and grounded. (Slow learner this one)
I haven’t turned into a junkie or a murderer or anything. Kids need to know that if you break the rules you have to suffer the consequences….
That stuff normally only happens at the Hyperdome.
LMR said :
Davo111 said :
PBO said :
Yep, yep, and yep.
Although I wouldn’t smack a child near his or her head/face. Smacking (appropriately) is a time-tested method of teaching discipline and consequences.
Do something about it or STFU.
I can’t believe that this still happens in this day and age.
Obviously the parents should have taken the child into a quiet area and had a 10 minute conference explaining to the child what was wrong with his behaviour and remedial steps that the child could take to reform said bad behaviour. Perhaps a warning that if the behaviour continued a stint in the “naughty corner” would be next?
Dazzab,
maybe next time you see an event like this you can take the parents aside and direct them in the proper parenting method?
Diggety said :
indeed!!!
Animals have breeding licences. Why not people??
Mr Gillespie said :
Because most of the people who go on about licences for kids are the ones most likely to be refused.
‘We MUST protect the children” Screw that, I want my R18+ for video games and my damn fireworks back!
LMR said :
Oops, looks like you posted on the wrong forum, apparently child abuse isn’t tolerated it’s to be actively encouraged.
“I got belted with a stick when I was young and it didn’t do me any harm” apparently it did but the people around you won’t say anything
LMR said :
or
if he gets smacked really hard in the back ot the head often enough and hard enough he might get a nice brain injury, that will learn him
or
it may teach him that physical attacks on people weaker than you are ok, and he can hit (bully) his siblings and classmates
or
it may teach him that excessive physical assults are the way to parent and abuse his future children in the same way, i.e. assuming the brain damage hasn’t affected his ability to breed, and he is not in jail for violence
For the record I am pro-smacking as a form of disipline, my children have been smacked. But come on surely you can do better than slapping a kid really hard in the back of the head.
I do think a well placed smack (as oppsed to a vicious) is sometimes needed and works well.
Davo111 said :
Yeah worked great, he immediately conformed and didn’t punch his brother or nothing…oh wait…
PBO said :
I whole heartedly agree, more violence against children, more rape, more murder, more whaling, more plastic bags, more asbestos, more asbestos, more asbestos! Do me a favour chuck in some extrafamine and a couple of handfuls of cancer too please.
Rangi said :
Of course, Thats what this thread is all about!?
LMR said :
Oh right, because the bogans that smack their children around in public never have any trouble with the law, do they? Property crimes and assault are presumably all committed by people who weren’t beaten enough when they were young.
Rangi said :
I take it your parents didnt love you enough so you are taking it out on everyone? Never had consensual sex in your life? pull your head in and stick to the subject you sensationalist!
LMR said :
The op commented on what they viewed as excessive violence to a child i.e. ‘slapped him so hard across the back of the head that it made quite a loud sound’, ‘I can honestly say that if that kid gets slapped like that on a regular basis then I think he’s going to end up physically injured’
I commented, sarcastically, with my view, on #5 PBO wanting more violence on children, so yeah, that IS what this thread is about. But thanks for your help anyway.
Hey Daz, weird comments today eh? It’s like only the most die hard trolls are on lately, maybe it’s the new format or something?
Anyway, I feel for you. And for the kids involved. Even if some readers are a person who says, ‘yeah, a smack is okay, happened to me when I was a kid and I’m fine’ etc etc. Who would you hit someone without a word and walk off?
Smacking is not what I’d do, but I could accept seeing a situation where a child gets a small smack and then the parent explains why the smack had to be. Stay with the child, not walk off with them crying! Hitting someone out of the blue is something a bully does. Hitting someone from behind is a cowards act.
PBO said :
Go beat and abuse your children you neanderthal.
Get someone to read you the op, they are talking about excessive violence against a child/children, which you seem to support. They were not talking about just a little smack or kick in the arse.
What’s with the ‘parents didnt love you / Never had consensual sex’ bit? What are you 6 year old, do your Mummy and Daddy know you are using the computer? Be carefull, if they don’t you might have to tell your teacher you fell down the stairs again.
I knew when I wrote this that I’d cop a fair amount from some people and that’s fine. I was interested in what people had to say and I was debriefing a bit.
I am a bit surprised though. People seem to have missed that what disturbed me was not that a child was slapped but rather how hard he was slapped.
That kid was standing on a step holding on to the railing probably waiting for his family to catch up to him. If he hadn’t been holding on he certainly would have fallen forward down those stairs given how hard he was hit. I know the difference between discipline and violence. If that guy had hit his partner in the same manner I’m sure you would all be going off about domestic violence.
As for minding my own business, well that’s just what I did at the time. I’m not sure that was the right thing to do but the guy took off and I just couldn’t think fast enough about what, if anything, I could do that would have a positive outcome for the kid and the family. So I chose to leave it knowing that the issue is going to come up again. Indeed, I’d bet big money the family is already known to child protection. You don’t hit a kid with that much force and anger without attracting some attention. Hopefully they will have the opportunity to work things out before something awful happens.
I spent years working with homeless kids on the streets. Not all of them were brats that needed a kick in the bum. I wouldn’t wish the crap they typically went through on anyone. And this incident just struck me as looking back in time to where it all starts.
Rangi said :
Now that i have gotten under your skin, read what i wrote first and stop being a sensationalist. When did i mention excessive violence against children? You were the one asking for more of it. People should be able to dicispline their children as they see fit and dont need upstarts like you making out like its the end of the world.
Stop skipping your medication and learn to read properly, tool.
Parents who hit their kids simply lack the competence to deal with whatever situation has presented itself. End of story.
Sure there’ll be a chorus of trout-mouthing and posturing from the said same cohort of numb-nut parents dribbling on about how it’s a natural part of parenting and that it does no harm … and whatever other lame crap they need to help justify their failure as human beings.
dazzab said :
So with your years of experience working with childern at risk you didnt know what to do besides posting here? How about alerting security, or the Police? I would have thought somone with your training and background would know exactly what to do under these circumstances. It would probably all be on the malls CCTV system.
Im as against child abuse as anyone else, but you having failed to take it further can take some responsibility if indeed this child is abused in the future.
PBO said :
But at least when they do break the law through lack of discipline, there’ll be a nice comfy bed and plasma waiting for them at the Hume Hilton. What one person calls a smack, another calls child abuse. The same way what one person calls jailing a criminal, another calls it inhumane confinement.
LMR said :
True. In this case my experience and judgement (in the 10 secs I had to think about it) told me that this was not the correct time/place to act and that doing so could have possibly made things worse. If I was currently working with kids I probably would have been willing to put myself out there a bit more to see if there was an opportunity to help. But that was a long time ago and it’s not easy. It’s always a tough call as to whether taking action will escalate a situation and perhaps cause even more damage or not. I still do my bit to contribute but I can’t change the world.
dazzab said :
Fair enough, to be honest if I witnessed it Im not sure Id want to get involved either. I guess it all depends on the circumstance, and with your experience you would probably make a better call than I could.