The ABC has new pages in the list of pathetic excuses offered by Matthew Massey to the courts.
The officer said Massey was unable to submit to urine analysis because sore ribs made urinating difficult and his mother had phoned to say he could not attend the meeting because he was having an allergic reaction to a cat.
I’ve had sore ribs. Still needed to wee though.
As for getting your mum to call in? Really? This is a hard man? With a cat allergy?
For his parole breaches he’s been remanded in custody until next week.
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I’d like a pair of those parole breeches…Are they shiny?
What is honestly wrong with this family? I’m curious on the story behind them as well as at what point the massey line went ‘bad’. There must have been some point where there was a negligent/abusive parent that started the cycle.
Thanks JB.
I needed that.
The heartening thing about this story is that the Magistrate followed through on the parole breach and jailed him. As for your rhetorical questions, I just had to laugh. Hard man? Only in his own mind. If brain cells were dynamite, he couldn’t blow his nose.
poetix said :
Well that changed quick-sticks.
His mother phoned.
Classic, just classic….
He uses his mum to call him in sick and then couldn’t piss for sore ribs? For someone who’s been in and out of the clink more times than most and made a life physical self-destruction, I’m pleasantly surprised at how light weight he is.
The whole family is a waste of space and resources.
As for getting your mum to call in? Really? This is a hard man? With a cat allergy?
yep, except for “hard man”, read “spineless bully”.
They pull this sort of crap because years of flailing around the justice system teaches them that it’s a fair chance of working. In a sense, they should be congratulated for learning something … anything :-\
Proof positive that even hard men own pussy cats.
He really is just a misunderstood sensitive new-age guy.
Even people with gallstones have to piss.
I’d like to have been a fly on the wall when that conversation took place, ‘I know, the beak’ll treat me kind if I just tell him this’. ‘Nah’ says his mate, ‘get your mum to call it in; dead set that’ll work’.
The Warnie strategy. Did Massey’s mum give him a diuretic as well?
poetix said :
Which is surprising, given the buttons.
What was the problem, he ran out of relatives to attend fake funerals for? Have to be desperate to try this excuse.
If I ever get another cat I’ll call it Massey.
Someone needs to give this man a good smack and tell him to grow the lump up. I’m gobsmacked that a grown-ass, supposedly “hard” man could act so remedial and childish.
What kind of penalty is he up for in the unlikely event his completely plausible story about rib pains and cat allergies turns out to be untrue, does anyone have an idea? I imagine we’d be looking at a failed drug-test into the bargain as well as the no-show for meeting.
DrKoresh said :
Garema Place stocks – there’s a centenary project I could get excited about. For one very big day, the best of the worst locked up with a variety of projectiles free to the public.
Any photos anywhere of this Massey lot ..
there’s one particularly attractive (cough) one of Gavin if you google his name – from a Canberra Times story i think. It must’ve been his mug shot. lol
Mamma Massey sounds like one of the Bra Boys’ mum, i.e. “my poor little fella, officer, he wouldn’t hurt a fly”
Did you know that he’s apparently a brickie and a painter so if anyone is thinking of doing some home reno’s he comes highly recommended!
MERC600 said :
http://images.canberratimes.com.au/2012/12/06/3868771/art353-mattmassey1-300×0.jpg
I remember reading or hearing that Massey is Scott mcdougals bum boy?
G-Fresh said :
What’d they do, shave an ape?
Ok, ok, but I maintain harsh but fair.
Yeah when I busted my ribs I didn’t wee for 6 mths ! And I have 3 cats (cough) (cough) (cough).
G-Fresh said :
That boy looks like he should be in a rockabilly band.
Looks like the ugly love-child of Kramer and Lyle Lovett
That photo’s about 18 years old. He hasn’t gotten any prettier.
Tooks said :
Not just ugly on the outside for he’s obviously rotten to the core.
c_c™ said :
Isn’t that what we have RiotACT for though, i.e. as virtual stocks from which to sling s*** at people anonymously?
We like to think it’s for a bit more than that.
Just humour him, gentoopenguin