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Tag Archives: jon stanhope

Ever more severe mobile phone laws

By 17 September 2010

Comrade Stanhope is increasingly frustrated with all of you ignoring him and continuing to use your phones whilst driving.
To that end he has made new laws so that the extent to which you ignore him is increased:
Under the laws, drivers can only use a mobile phone to make or receive a call if the phone [...]

Heritage Grants Awarded

By 15 September 2010

Mr Stanhope has announced the winning projects for the 2010-11 ACT Heritage Grants program, in total $340,000:
Michelle Fulton
Prepare a Conservation Management Plan for Well Station Homestead Precinct: Stage 1 Homestead Precinct CMP: Stage 2 Indigenous Cultural Survey, Archaeological & Additional Values
Elizabeth Burness
Printing of booklet to distribute to ACT schools and public libraries.
Canberra & District Historical [...]

$100,000 of our money to Pakistan

By 15 September 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope has decided that you have been insufficiently generous to the nuclear armed terror sponsor state of Pakistan in it’s flood ravaged troubles.
Not to worry, he’s written a cheque for $100,00 on all our behalfs to correct our errors of judgment.
“I know that many Canberrans have already made personal contributions to victims of [...]

A roadside memorials policy

By 13 September 2010

The Chiefly Stanhope has announced a policy on roadside memorials which is also online.
Whether grieving bogans will take a blind bit of notice remains debateable. In our post christian era, stripped of time proven grief mechanisms, the new paganism of sacrificial offerings at the site of deaths is a powerful thing.
The policy is:
• The ACT [...]

Canberra Chronicle – stopping unwanted deliveries

By 7 September 2010

[First filed: Sep 6, 2010 @ 9:35]
[Proof drivers can achieve tight groupings over time]
I do not want the Canberra Chronicle delivered.  The only reason it is delivered free is because it makes enough revenue from advertisers to be economically feasible to publish and deliver.
My reasons are: – the cost to cut the trees down, [...]

Did I hear right? Stanhope defending the pokies …

By 4 September 2010

I couldn’t believe my ears this morning – on 666, Stanhope – I’ve never heard him so animated! – on the topic of pokies.
He committed to defending the clubs and their pokies to the hilt.
Now, I have an issue with the argument that “community groups and clubs will suffer if we regulate the [...]

Tide turned on public art?

By 3 September 2010

The Canberra Times’ Diana Streak made it to the ANU School of Art yesterday to report on the Chiefly Stanhope’s musings on public art.
Miraculously, since the ACT Government stopped spending so much money on public art, Mr Stanhope has noted less heat in the community on the subject. What could possibly have brought that about [...]

The bell tolls for the ACT Public Service

By 3 September 2010

An increasingly exasperated Chief Minister has announced that he’s sending Allan Hawke in to clean up the ACT Public Service.
Chief Minister Jon Stanhope said the Government wanted to be sure that the configuration of the public sector remained appropriate for meeting the broad-ranging needs of government and to deliver on the Government’s agenda for the [...]

Wouldn’t it be nice if Roads ACT were responsible?

By 29 August 2010

The Canberra Times informs us that, failure being an orphan, Reynders Constructions are shouting loud and long that they built the collapsed bridge formwork over the GDE exactly the way it was on the plans.
As the spider’s web of contractors and consultants point fingers the culpability of Roads ACT becomes clearer.
– Roads ACT presided over [...]

Legislating to save on process servers

By 27 August 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope has announced new laws to handle licence suspensions.
This follows the news in July that the ACT Government was running an illegal operation on licence suspensions.
Some of the problems have been dealt with administratively. But for the other hiccups we need new laws:
“This legislation deals with another aspect of the Court’s decision, [...]

Stanhope to speak at length on public art.

By 25 August 2010

[ 2 September 2010 at 11:00 am; ]

ArtsACT is warning that the Chief Minister and Minister for the Arts and Heritage, Jon Stanhope, MLA, is going to be speaking at the ANU’s School of art with a speech titled: The Politics of the ACT Government’s Percent-for-Art Scheme

Mr Stanhope will discuss the importance of public art in our streetscapes and city places, its [...]

Liberals on the GDE Collapse

By 18 August 2010

The Gungahlin Drive bridge collapse happened on Saturday afternoon.
By Tuesday afternoon, between 4.40pm and 5pm they managed to put their response online (dated 16 August mind you):
“I was shocked to see the images of the bridge collapse. It is a terrible situation and on behalf of the Canberra Liberals, I would like to pass [...]

Input wanted on playground upgrades

By 17 August 2010

Mr Stanhope is planning upgrades to playgrounds at Ashburton Circuit, Kaleen; Tauchert Street, Chapman; Morgan Place, Curtin; Jeffries Street, Gowrie; De Little Circuit, Greenway; and Bayley Place, Macarthur.
His Chiefliness is looking for community views on what should be done to them by 24 September and says there’s a feedback form somewhere on the TAMS [...]

Rejoice, Rejoice! 90% of Canberra Connect customers satisfied!

By 16 August 2010

His Chiefliness has the happy news that 90% of you are satisfied by the Canberra Connect service.
Chief Minister and Minister for Territory and Municipal Services, Jon Stanhope, said 90 per cent of the 600 Canberrans who participated in the survey were satisfied with their experience and 94 per cent were pleased with the service [...]

We have a bonsai collection!

By 16 August 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope brings the astonishing news that not only does his arboretum have a “National Bonsai and Penjing Collection of Australia”, but since it was located in a pavilion in Commonwealth Park two years ago it has been visited 100,000 times!
It currently displays 32 deciduous, evergreen, conifer and native trees, including a Desert [...]

New amenity for rough trade

By 12 August 2010

As we’re getting over 8,000 visits a day it’s inevitable that at least one of you likes going to public toilets for anonymous gay sex.
To those readers I say rejoice!
Jon Stanhope has announced that Black Mountain and Weston Park are getting new toilet blocks with the old “log cabin” designs to be consigned to the [...]

Everyone’s talking tough on the public service

By 6 August 2010

The Canberra Times has a piece on hereditary Labor warlord Joe Ludwig talking tough on ripping $840 million in savings from the Public Service.
Jon Stanhope promises that whatever Labor does the Liberals would be worse. But he would say that wouldn’t he?

THE ARTISTS ARE COMING, M16 Artspace opens at Griffith

By 6 August 2010

[ 13 August 2010 at 6:00 pm; ] The wait is over! Come and indulge your senses at the launch of the new and improved M16 Artspace. Canberra’s newest cultural destination will be opened by Mr Jon Stanhope MLA, Chief Minister ACT, at 6pm on Friday 13 August.

A place to make, share and experience art, M16 at Griffith is the largest community-based visual [...]

Peter Garrett visits the arboretum

By 3 August 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope is trumpeting the latest celebrity planting at his arboretum:
Federal Environment Protection Minister Peter Garrett joined Chief Minister Jon Stanhope in the planting of a Queensland Kauri at the National Arboretum today.
The Agathis Robusta, commonly known as the Queensland Kauri, joins many other native trees which have been planted by visiting dignitaries and [...]

Changeover at the top?

By 28 July 2010

My sources all say there’s not much to it.
But it’s worth noting that Jessica Wright (now on the SMH) has been speculating that the Minister Not Responsible, Katy Gallagher, is about to tap the Brave and Chiefly Stanhope on the shoulder.
Internal party speculation is rife that Chief Minister Jon Stanhope is preparing to stand [...]

Family of seven laps up first land rent house

By 27 July 2010

Our Brave Leader is letting us all know that the first house under the long running land rent scheme has finally been moved into.
Chief Minister Jon Stanhope said the home, one of 1000 being built for rent or sale by CHC Affordable Housing under a deal with the ACT Government, was the first of [...]

City Road Works Complete!

By 27 July 2010

His Chiefliness (Long May He Reign) has declared an end to the road works blighting Civic these past months:
Two of Canberra’s busiest roads, Northbourne Avenue and London Circuit, have undergone major safety improvements and maintenance with $7.6 million road works now complete, Chief Minister and Minister for Transport, Jon Stanhope, said today.
“Almost 43,000sqm of [...]

ACT economy still booming

By 26 July 2010

The Chiefly Stanhope is thrilled to announce the ACT still has the fastest growing economy in the nation with a stonking 8.1% growth rate.
“This is a remarkable result for such a small economy as ours,” Mr Stanhope said. “The ACT’s 8.1 per cent growth rate demonstrates the fiscally-responsible approach we adopted, heading in and out [...]

THE CARNAGE MUST STOP!

By 22 July 2010

Jon Stanhope, perhaps smarting from his foolish Vision Zero immediately before a series of freak accidents blew out the road toll, is taking his angry voice to all of you.
Sure it starts as an “appeal”, and moves on with some initiatives which give the appearance of action such as punishing p-platers using cough syrup, point [...]

Another swing at heritage listing the bus depot

By 21 July 2010

Our Brave Leader has announced that on the second attempt the ACT Heritage Council has agreed to provisionally list the former bus depot in Kingston on the ACT’s Heritage Register.
Mr Stanhope said the listing acknowledged the historical significance of the site, which dates back to the 1940s…
In making its decision, the Council noted the significance [...]

CCTV bandaid for failed waste policies

By 21 July 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope is unwittingly identifying another abject policy failure. This time announcing “Closed Circuit Television (CCTV) cameras at 24-hour recycling centres in an effort to curb illegal dumping and the associated clean-up costs”.
The ACT Government manages six drop-off recycling centres which collectively accept over 3700 tonnes of recyclables each year.
However some Canberrans are [...]

Centenary walking trail

By 20 July 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope has set in motion the planning of a “Centenary Trail”:
“The design study will look into the feasibility and design of a self-guided Centenary Trail which will journey through rural and urban areas of Canberra,” Mr Stanhope said. “Design ideas provided by local community groups will be taken into consideration throughout the study.
“Locals [...]

Postcards from China – The Major of Beijing

By 8 July 2010

The latest missive from the Chiefly procession through the middle kingdom informs us that everyone is having a lovely time in Canberra’s latest Sister City (Versailles and Nara are somewhere in there).
You’ll all be relieved to hear that our friends in Beijing (after a rather good banquet one presumes from the typos in the release) [...]

Postcards from China

By 7 July 2010

The Chiefly Caravan through China reports that such a lovely time was had in Tianjin Mayor Huang Xingguo is going to lead a delegation from that city of 12 million people to Canberra.
Apparently we have much to learn from each other.
Our brave delegates are now moving on to Shanghai.

Peace in our time – ACT PS pay dispute apparently over

By 1 July 2010

Chief Minister Stanhope has announced an agreement on ACT Public Service Pay.
The in-principle agreement is based upon the Government’s final wage offer, providing for a 2.5% salary increase from 1 July 2010 and a common nominal expiry date of 30 June 2011 for the agreements. The Government has also offered a sign-on bonus of [...]

Chiefly broadsides in the drug driving battle

By 30 June 2010

With the police arguing amongst themselves on drug driving our Chief Minister has gone rapid fire with his thoughts.
Late yesterday saw the first media release saying Liberals and Greens can’t handle the truth.
Chief Minister Jon Stanhope said it was remarkable that both the Liberals and Greens had today criticised the Government for releasing the [...]

Arboretum and Timor-Leste finally collide in Chiefly climax

By 24 June 2010

Chief Minister Jon Stanhope has announced that he’s been able to combine his two great loves, Timor-Leste and his Arboretum:
Chief Minister Jon Stanhope has today [yesterday] joined His Excellency Dr José Ramos-Horta, President of the Democratic Republic of Timor-Leste, to plant a Melia azedarach, commonly known as a White cedar, in the Central Valley [...]

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