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The Relationship Age Gap

By 22 August 2014 14

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Age gaps in relationships aren’t uncommon and the trend usually leans towards an older man with a younger woman. In the US in 2013 in over 53% of relationships the man was 2 years or more older than the woman.

My first serious relationship was with someone who was 12 years older than me, it’s funny how with even a large age gap like that he was as mature as my then 16 year old brother.

A friend of mine dated a man 15 years her senior, she said she got a lot of funny glances they would get at the shopping centre when seen to be holding hands. However she brushed it off us their problem not hers, she was happy, he was happy, whose else business was it about their age gap. Luckily for me, my then boyfriend didn’t look his age so we were never subject to the weird looks.

Then there’s the reverse, an older woman dating a younger man. While there are certain benefits such as sexual peak scientifically matches more with a younger man and older women, there is the other side of the stigma and ‘how it looks’.

While seeing an older man and younger woman isn’t totally out of the norm and these days telling someones age gap on face value isn’t always easy, an older woman and a younger man tends to be more noticeable and more subject to gossip or assumptions.

To be honest I have no one in my friendship circle where the woman is older than the man, in fact every single couple the guy is older, in some cases almost 10 years older.

A friend from high school started seeing her now husband in year 11 and hid his age from her parents for years, him being 5 years older. Of course now they’re 27 and 32, but back then she was 17 and he was 22 – much more controversial!

I was 22 when seeing my ex who was 34 and even telling my parents then I felt like I had to dumb down his age by saying, ‘Oh but he doesn’t look it’, because THAT’s what matter, whether he looks it. I seemed terrified to be the girl dating the older guy, where as now I get older age gaps seems much more irrelevant.

Are there women out there with younger husbands and boyfriends? Did you hide the age gap from people are did you happily tell people? Did you cop any flack or was everyone pretty ok with it?

What's the age gap between you and your partner?

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14 Responses to
The Relationship Age Gap
chewy14 8:04 pm
22 Aug 14
#1

I find it amusing when women date men who are older and claim that it’s because their “maturity” levels are equal.

gooterz 12:55 pm
23 Aug 14
#2

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Samara Gentle 1:29 pm
23 Aug 14
#3

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

astrojax 3:28 pm
23 Aug 14
#4

i was with a woman six years older, for ten years. my next partner was eleven years my junior. both relationships ended, but in both we were equally unflustered about the age gap; it was never a thing.

age v maturity – hard, as they’re two different beasts. anyway, my motto is ‘grow old, not up’…

gooterz 4:31 pm
23 Aug 14
#5

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

The male gets a younger host for his children and thus more likely to be healthier and the woman gets security.

fabforty 5:26 pm
23 Aug 14
#6

chewy14 said :

I find it amusing when women date men who are older and claim that it’s because their “maturity” levels are equal.

Why ?

Samara Gentle 7:46 pm
23 Aug 14
#7

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

The male gets a younger host for his children and thus more likely to be healthier and the woman gets security.

It’s just interesting that rather than first pointing out a man goes for a younger woman for reproduction purposes that you first point out it’s because women are clearly just looking for income. Been burnt much?

gooterz 10:30 pm
23 Aug 14
#8

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

The male gets a younger host for his children and thus more likely to be healthier and the woman gets security.

It’s just interesting that rather than first pointing out a man goes for a younger woman for reproduction purposes that you first point out it’s because women are clearly just looking for income. Been burnt much?

They’re both for childrearing ..
You don’t have to be burnt to realise that a man has a much better chance if he has a job. Men are more interested in genetics.

I find it interesting that you post like a teen dating site on a forum that usually has a much older clientele.

Plus my post was in relation to Chewy’s post.

Maya123 11:39 am
24 Aug 14
#9

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

The male gets a younger host for his children and thus more likely to be healthier and the woman gets security.

It’s just interesting that rather than first pointing out a man goes for a younger woman for reproduction purposes that you first point out it’s because women are clearly just looking for income. Been burnt much?

They’re both for childrearing ..
You don’t have to be burnt to realise that a man has a much better chance if he has a job. Men are more interested in genetics.

I find it interesting that you post like a teen dating site on a forum that usually has a much older clientele.

Plus my post was in relation to Chewy’s post.

“Men are more interested in genetics.”
I dispute that. Genetics is more important to women, because they can potentially have less offspring then men, so it’s more important they get the best genetic father for the child. Men can potentially father many more children than a woman, from many women, so genetics becomes less important. For women it’s quality; for men it’s quantity. This might help explain why a percentage of children are not the husband’s.
However, I suspect you meant age of the women.
While it’s true that the older the women the less likely the woman is able to have a child, I heard of recent research that has shown that contrary to often held opinions, it is the older father who is more likely to produce mutations in the child’s genes. Older female produce less mutations compared to older males.
http://www.nature.com/news/fathers-bequeath-more-mutations-as-they-age-1.11247
So, women, regardless of your age, if want the best outcome for your child, with the fewest genetic mutations, select a young father.

Samara Gentle 1:26 pm
24 Aug 14
#10

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

gooterz said :

Older men date younger women for attraction. Younger women date older men for their maturity (of their income)

Oh yes for women everything comes down to money.

The male gets a younger host for his children and thus more likely to be healthier and the woman gets security.

It’s just interesting that rather than first pointing out a man goes for a younger woman for reproduction purposes that you first point out it’s because women are clearly just looking for income. Been burnt much?

They’re both for childrearing ..
You don’t have to be burnt to realise that a man has a much better chance if he has a job. Men are more interested in genetics.

I find it interesting that you post like a teen dating site on a forum that usually has a much older clientele.

Plus my post was in relation to Chewy’s post.

I think regardless of clientele, dating is something people go through at any age. With divorce and separation at a much higher rate the chance of the older clientele being single is high :)

gooterz 5:28 pm
24 Aug 14
#11

Samara Gentle said :

I think regardless of clientele, dating is something people go through at any age. With divorce and separation at a much higher rate the chance of the older clientele being single is high :)

True.. but usually when they’re split up once they usually want someone who is upto the same in life but don’t care about age. Aren’t going to go clubbing to find one (usually).

I’d be asking things like how many older people are using tinder ?
How old is too old to snapchat. Best grocery isle to meet a match.
Is the frozen food isle all it’s out to be.

Will people actually date someone across the border, even though its closer than parts of the ACT.

Samara Gentle 2:40 pm
25 Aug 14
#12

gooterz said :

Samara Gentle said :

I think regardless of clientele, dating is something people go through at any age. With divorce and separation at a much higher rate the chance of the older clientele being single is high :)

True.. but usually when they’re split up once they usually want someone who is upto the same in life but don’t care about age. Aren’t going to go clubbing to find one (usually).

I’d be asking things like how many older people are using tinder ?
How old is too old to snapchat. Best grocery isle to meet a match.
Is the frozen food isle all it’s out to be.

Will people actually date someone across the border, even though its closer than parts of the ACT.

Good point! I’ll definitely add those topics into the mix – thanks :)

VYBerlinaV8_is_back 8:25 am
26 Aug 14
#13

Sounds almost like some of us have a hang-up about age gaps. Provided everyone is consenting and over 18 I don’t really see what the problem is. If you’re a young bloke and want to date a cougar, go for it. If you’re a young woman and want a sugar daddy, fill your boots.

One thing I’m not sure of when I read this story and comments is whether people are more interested in dating or in long term committment. I guess people want different things.

thy_dungeonman 11:37 am
26 Aug 14
#14

VYBerlinaV8_is_back said :

If you’re a young bloke and want to date a cougar, go for it.

That’s me alright.

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