8 September 2007

A subtle bully in the APS

| Masquara
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I don’t want to embark on a whine fest, but if anyone has dealt with, or observed, a subtle bully in the APS I’d appreciate some advice on what to do. I’m experiencing the classic subtle bully – everyone else on the team kept happy as lark, and I’m on a ‘slow track’ and my bully (who at 50-odd is still just like the ‘playground bitch’) who took an intense dislike to me on her arrival in the department, is thoroughly enjoying being able to comment on just how junior my position still is in the organisation after three years (while everyone else is being promoted).

A bully knows of course all too well that if you label a team member as barely competent, you can engineer a perception of incompetence, followed by de-skilling, followed presumably by actual incompetence through depression. (not there yet, but I’m starting to feel at risk). Have any rioters observed someone in my position and can senior management do anything? All advice I’ve had so far is ‘get the **** away from any corporate bully’ – but the work itself (once I manage to get just one rung higher than my current role) should be rewarding and I don’t really want to shift.

Just one anecdote to illustrate this gal’s MO: announced to a recent team meeting with immense hilarity and schadenfreude that she had heard one of the dept’s graduates had made a massive faux pas by telling the Secretary she felt her skills were underutilised, and my manager stated with a lot of cruel mirth that the grad was now on a slow track to annihilation and now had no future in the department. It was a little like witnessing a public stoning. No doubt the graduate’s actual name was mentioned in a tighter group – a chorus of ‘what was her name?’ was only stopped at the main meeting when a team member piped up and said she didn’t want to know.

Luckily for the graduate, the Secretary had it understood soon after, that she welcomed the frank discussion with the graduates. Being in this bully’s own team, I have no such protection from a member of the Executive!

As I said, though, I actually want to salvage my career, not embark on my own series of victim anecdotes! Any tips or advice welcome. My bully, by the way, believes she is ‘like THAT’ with the Secretary. Is it inevitably career suicide to identify as a victim of a bully, and just how wide is the gap between HR rhetoric and the way victims are treated by HR?

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Good to hear you got a positive outcome, Masquara. These clever, sneaky bullies are rife in mg’t positions in some organisations. The women who are syrupy sweet are the ones to watch, they can turn out to be absolute nightmares. I’m glad at least one was caught, but there’s never any lasting effects on them, you see them climbing the career ladder. Actually, one I know has jumped from organisation to organisation, but I suspect it’s more to do with ineptitude.

Update on my subtle bully post more than a year on: unusually, I survived her! She has moved on, as senior colleagues had begun to notice a mismatch between her self-aggrandization and her own performance. It turns out she is a serial bully – evidence she gave earlier this year in the relevant tribunal regarding an earlier, severe case where she bullied an EL1 over three years was openly not believed and discounted by the presiding officer – who stated such on the record – and Comcare were sent back to reconsider. Which they did, and her next-last victim is on the mend. Her earlier victim has outlined identical behaviours, and there was another three-year victim previous to her. Unfortunately, I believe that she may learn with each episode and become more damaging and cunning – and the next unfortunate won’t stand a chance as she hones her techniques. Anyone in the APS who is currently delighted by an uber-charming, ultra-humorous and amusing brand-new boss – be on your guard!

Ingeegoodbee, a few people I know could have used you then. They were done…but that’s another story.

I think they’ve fixed that, ant.

Dead right. The threats are threats, and people postins here are meant to be anonymous (although apparenlty we are not, which is a major flaw). You have to really wonder about the motivation for someone mouthing threats. It really makes you wonder.

Thank you all – I think if there’s been any misconduct above I suspect it is Laughing’s threat – and of course such trolling and attempts to undermine anonymity are unwelcome on this community forum.

Ingeegoodbee3:43 pm 16 Sep 07

I wouldn’t give any thought to dipsh!t ingrates like LaughingAtYou – the reality is they’re lower than pissants and its a fact that they can do absolutely nothing about your posts here – you’ve done nothing wrong. Having, from time to time, been responsible for managingt alledged and real breaches of the APS code, I can assure you, there’s nothing to worry about.

Masquara, my only advice now is to be careful as to what you say on here. It is not unheard of for the APS etc to have people ‘watching’ this (and other) sites.

And then the best bit is, they’ll do you for misconduct – for speaking out but not actually naming anyone.

Gotta love this place.

Sasha – I don’t disagree with much of what you say. I know of a couple of cases where agency heads got involved to deal with SES staff who needed to be dealt with in relation to rgeir treatment of staff, but it’s not as common as it should be. As you suggest, they are often too busy running their agency to be able to deal with the people in it.

It’s a pick and choose approach. With one of my monsters, I was able to make a frank statement that at least made it clear that I thought the manager’s actions to me and others were very poor. The person in question was very clever and far more interested in ideas and less worried about running squashing exercises. With the other manager, I had to get away – this manager lacked the intellect or inclination to see beyond a very healthy self-image that showed a good-humoured, caring soul. The manager associated principally or only with subordinate staff personally selected in the manager’s own image who owed their careers to the manager. The manager worked upwards by keeping the executive in the dark about issues. Anyone who questioned anything was marginalised and any work from the outgroup was either credited to the ingroup or rejected for reasons that owed nothing to content, expression, sense or consistency. The manager was simply unable to see that the disconnect between self-image and reality. I got out because I could not see a way to let some light shine in. The agency moved the manager on a while later, once a few things came to light.

I suppose, in shorthand and apologising for the labels, I found it easier to deal with a perfectionist mad person than with a smiling and thick psychopath. The mad person was at least capable of thinking reasonably. Some people could not deal with the first, some could not deal with the second and some presumably could either deal or not with both of them. One was capable of reasoned discourse, the other understood what I meant only when I asked someone in the Executive to point out why I was leaving. IMHO, neither should ever have been put in charge of people.

Perhaps there could be an entirely new discussion about henchpersons, but this thread has been very valuable for me and I certainly don’t need to embark on one. Does anyone sense a thinly veiled threat there I wonder.

Nice threatening post by “LaughingAtYou”. Where did that come from? why the venom? Seems rather personal.

LaughingAtYou9:52 am 16 Sep 07

Read between the lines, people. I would suggest that this website has heard only one very biased side of this story by ‘Masquara’. I suspect that, were this so-called ‘subtle bully’ able to tell her side, we would hear a very different story. I would also like to point out to ‘Masquara’ that she isn’t as anonymous as she thinks she is. Perhaps ‘Masquara’ needs to find another way of salvaging her career – like finding one she is actually good at.

Vice Pope, thanks. Apologies too for taking so long to respond. Look, I think the bottomline is this. The top brass do not want to have to deal with this stuff. Even though it is their job, there is nothing in it for them. In fact, most of them are where they are because they work long hours. And why? Either their families can’t stand them or they can’t relate to people, or both. They want to get credit for big vision shit. Not touchy feelie shit.

Having said that, you don’t have to dob the one who is bastardising you. It’s the underlying threat that’s important. Regardless of the recruitment practices, Vice Pope, SES have to meet the SES leadership capability framework in their performance appraisals. Fear that they can’t get their bonus can be very motivating. The other issue is, if everyone leaves in the same situation, then this bastardisation is going to continue. I know the Secretary involved (there aren’t that many female Secretaries ie heads of departments) – and I think she would be appalled that this shit is going on on her turf. I would tell her. But, hey, that’s me. Career kamikaze. Always worried about the treatment of the next set of graduates. But leaving could be good too. I just never found running away helped anything. The one time I did this it was to a worse situation – something I hadn’t contemplated as being possible at the time!

@Smallchicken – You want to chastise me on my spelling over the grammatical anomalies in your post ?

I cannot put into this thread you how much I am laughing AT you right now.

Have you even heard of paragraph structure ?

Anyways – Toodles, on account of I’m never hearing from you again.

Bye. Comment by smallchicken — 13 September, 2007 @ 10:35 am

P.S. I stand by my comment re: Texta marks and fanta bottle. At no time did I say that you were sharehousing, I merely categorised you as a person who would in that situation. Thanks for the update on your personal life though – again I cannot impart how utterly worthless that information is in mere black and white form.

Thank you.

Ingeegoodbee7:23 pm 13 Sep 07

Nyssa – stuff like that must come as the bleeding obvious for you, but not me. You know, you’re probably right – I stand by my later comments about passive-agressive types making out like the worlds after them when they’re the real problem but my labelling all and sundry as nutters was unhelpful.

Ant you can email me at masquaramATgmail.com. I’ll cancel the account if I get spammed or abused. cheers

Well spotted Nyssa. On a thread about bullying, some people said things that could look like hectoring or ridicule. Not helpful.

Ingeegoodbee, here’s a thought, did it not occur to you that people would be ‘afraid’ to talk about it on here for fear of being labelled a nutter? When positive comments/advice were given, people felt comfortable in speaking up.

SmallChicken – I cannot apologise for Maelinar or for anyone else. Their opinions are their own.

For my part, your account had such a ring of truth to it. Sometimes, it’s possible to fight and sometimes not. You made the call that seemed best, and it was the call I suspect a lot of us would make if we had the strength to do so.

I have not been a RA participant for long, but I can see every reason you should continue to contribute and none why you should not. Best wishes.

smallchicken10:35 am 13 Sep 07

Smallchicken – I already know that in a share flat, you are the person who marks where they have drunk on the fanta bottle with a texta, and count how many sheets of toilet paper you use.

Call it a steriotyping all you will, it’s an effective way of categorising people.

Comment by Maelinar — 12 September, 2007 @ 2:51 pm

Maelinar I own 2 houses outright, I’m married and I am often a messy slob. Your ‘sterIotyping’ didn’t work but I expect you are just another narrow minded bigot, who, as sepi has said, provides me with just one more reason why I won’t bother coming back and sharing my experience on a web-site again. Yeah, it’s great fun having an anxiety disorder Maelinar, and having a-holes like you who put down those who decide to open up and share their experiences is boring and predictable. Maelinar, why not visit a site where other narrow minded bigots like yourself can discover your true inner insecurities? I know the typing practice without a spell-checker would be good for you. Sorry to everyone else but I’ve had a gutful of losers like Maelinar, nothing positive to contribute, small brain and sounding a lot like they wrote Pauline Hanson’s first ever paliamentary address. Bye.

Ingeegoodbee8:04 am 13 Sep 07

nyssa, advice was sought, advice was given, I ‘d just hate to see what is otherwise a very useful thread degenerate into a agony-aunt session for every agrieved employee.

Also, while it’s undeniable that there are a bunch of a-hole bosses out there, it’s also true that workplaces have their fair share of passive-agressive personality types in the employment ranks, that make an artform out of pissing everyone off and then claiming underdog status like the whole world is out to get them.

end of rant.

Ingeegoodbee – why is it that all the people that don’t want to ‘see’ or ‘hear’ about workplace bullying, think the victim is always a nutter?

It’s called being accountable for your behaviour. If a boss does bully or harass you, they should be disciplined. However, due to the BS and suck-up ability of most bullies, it is never seen as bullying e.g. “We were just joking around and he laughed at first but then got all stroppy.” Translated “I took the piss outta him being a nancy boy and he couldn’t hack it.”

sepi, I know what you mean.

it’s a pity we can’t email each other. My particular bully is still making hay out of the bullying thing… I’m actually gobsmacked at how blatant it is. I googled him after this discussion began and was stunned to note that he’s been recently involved in the anti-bullying scene. If only they knew.

The idea that anyone who is having workplace issues must be a nutter is why I chose not to complain when I was having an issue.

I’ve worked in heaps of jobs in public and private, large and small depts/organisations and I’ve never had a problem. Then I suddenly got a psycho boss, in an organisation I was new to, and suddenly it was happening to me.

Before that I was probably guilty of thinking these things happened to people with problems themselves, but not anymore.

And as soon as I moved to a different area everything went back to normal. Several other people went to great lengths to leave the team with the strange boss, not just me – one took a demotion to get out. So I’m confident he was the problem, not me.

Very gingerly told part of the story to the GM today. Interesting isn’t it – they are so skilled (trained) at listening and pretending the conversation is going somewhere – then you’re back out of the office with no outcomes! I was very careful, but put a few things on the record in a non-blaming fashion, and referred to the team meeting sledging without specifics. The facts speak for themselves. As I expected, while I was having the discussion I quietly came to the conclusion, as pretty much everyone has told me here, that going the official complaint route would get me nowhere. Thanks again.

Ingeegoodbee8:11 pm 12 Sep 07

Oh god it’s time to be honest people – call it naming the bleeding obvious if you will – but how come everyone who ends up having workplace problems is really some kind of closet fruit-loop (as evidenced by the denials and attacks that will follow this post like night follows day)

If anyone’s going to correct Mael’s spelling, it’s me.

smallchicken5:29 pm 12 Sep 07

Maelinar – Isn’t it embarrassing that when you tried to have a bit of a go at me, that you couldn’t spell? Call it stupidity if you will, it’s an effective way of dealing with tossers.

I will say that there is a LARGE DIFFERENCE between the Public Service and the private sector. And the actual differences are …well I’m sure we all know. It’s sad, but true.

Anyway. I am not gonna harp on it. I plan to have a life outside of work.

Smallchicken – I already know that in a share flat, you are the person who marks where they have drunk on the fanta bottle with a texta, and count how many sheets of toilet paper you use.

Call it a steriotyping all you will, it’s an effective way of categorising people.

smallchicken1:44 pm 12 Sep 07

Take up meditation once a day! It helps. I sympathise with all of you who have suffered at the hands of the vindictive. I have a crippling anxiety depressive disorder and decided soon after I joined the APS to inform HR and my Director so that I was covered: Ouch! My Director decided to make me her experiment: doing the strangest of things like promoting me to Acting APS6 and then not two weeks later – making me have weekly meetings with her and my supervisor to address my many failings – including a weekly assessment from her whilst she played psychologist with my head. Then I was physically attacked at work – so what does she do at the meeting between me, the attacker, my supervisor and her? She believes the attacker’s quickly made up story that I had been sending inappropriate emails, and tears me to shreds – without a shred of evidence and in the middle of a meeting to resolve a serious case of a workplace attack! She was wrong by the way – after my Branch Head personally checked there were no inappropriate emails! Oh how I wanted to tell the Branch Head then and there that the only inappropriate email I ever received was from my Director. She sent me a lovely animated picture thingy of a woman lifting up her top and you could make the boobs move by moving your mouse. I guess that was my introduction to the variety of double standards here! I am not going to destroy her life by telling anyone about it though, as the commentators above have so aptly said, there are really two choices more often than not, put up with where you are and suffer – or move on. I know I could have dobbed her in, but life seems to have taught me that revenge doesn’t play out like is does in film – and bad people don’t always lose. My greatest escape, once again, was to resign over the inappropriate email thing – then when the powers that be checked and found I was in the clear – I was asked back – and this time I asked for a few extras – and got them, including being moved to a new section with a new Director who is a breath of fresh, un-stressed air. Meanwhile I helped HR to join the dots around my previous Director’s poor management of me and other staff – in that exit interview I had…. That’s revenge enough for me. Cheers.

seepi, try non-existant.

Equity officers are really only sounding boards and direction givers.

No one will be effectively disciplined until the system is overhauled and the bastards, who do nothing, are thrown out.

It is interesting that noone has come in with a success story of taking on a bully or seeking assistance from an equity officer. I suspect their success rates are low.

Nyssa I am very interested in your website The Trouble with Teachers (I NEED it!) but can’t see the ad here on RA nor find it through searching. Can you post a link?

um, did anyone bother to ask masquara if s/he actually wanted the job and took it because ‘that job’ was what s/he wanted to do?

if you feel that you are in the right job and it is what you want to do, masquara, then stand up and go to the division head of corporate, or to your own FAS unless instinct tells otherwise. but first, does your department have something like an harassment contact officer network? use it!

good luck!

Ingeegoodbee8:48 am 10 Sep 07

On the absence of a reference from your boss – if you see a job/position advertised that you want to go for ring the contact person, meet them, have a chat over a coffee and explain that you are reluctant to seek a reference from your boss – find out if thats going to be an issue – if the person doing the hiring dosn’t care, why should you.

Also, most departments will have a number of senior people who for one reason or another end up being unoffical recruitment brokers – they know who’s looking to move, they know who’s a a-hole, they know where the work is, what projects are comming up, who’s desperate to find someone etc etc. this is outside of any formal HR process, they won’t have it in their job description but you should be able to find them – again, have a coffee, talk them through what you want to do – in terms of a new job and get yourself on the shadow recruitment network.

VYBerlinaV8 now_with_added grunt8:25 am 10 Sep 07

It’s always possible to take the moral high ground and try to do something formally, but this often hurts you in the longer term, as you may (rightly or wrongly) be branded a troublemaker.

Start looking for new jobs today. Check the gazette, check some online sites. Regardless of the moral positions, this is your job and career we’re talking about here – don’t be one of the many people who get shafted all the time in this way. Also, try to work as well as possible between now and when you leave. This will achieve 2 things:
1) You will be getting into practice for being a high performer in your new role, and
2) Your boss will look all the stupider to their management when they fail to retain a good staff member.

Also, don’t ever bad-mouth or bag your boss, to anyone. This can catch up with you if you’re not careful.

Realise you can be the better person, find a new job, and move forward without ever looking back.

luke.downing8:11 am 10 Sep 07

Some very good advice in the comments Masquara. Document everything, especially the small things, they will indeed establish a pattern of behaviour.
Ask for directions / requests to be in writing at all times – don’t back down on this, as it will force the bully to spend more time defending their actions and reduce their time available to conduct their verbal abuse.
Above all, smile and be courteous to them at all times. It will petrify them and get them thinking as to how they have been outmanouvered.
Good luck – and get out as soon as you can!

Yep, I agree with virtually everyone here (what a change!). The job market is booming at the moment, so:
a) Look for a new job.
b) Encourage, pursuade, use jedi mind tricks on your boss so they get a new job.

Meanwhile work hard, work above your level, get noticed by people higher up (or sideways at your bosses level) – that way you’ll get a good reference for promotion/transfer applications.

Definitely get out. There are tonnes of jobs around at the moment, you could find yourself enjoying any number of new things. I also was the victim of a workplace bully years ago – definitely a psychopath. Karma was definitely on my side. I ended up with a way better job, he eventually ended up unemployed (seriously!).

swamiOFswank9:17 pm 09 Sep 07

Swaggie, you and I should be besties…(see my post above)

Sepi, no the novel is not set in Canberra.

Masquara, please keep us posted as to what happens, and I hope it’s positive and soon.

Sasha – I’d agree with your approach, if the person is able to take it up to the monster without having to endure unacceptable consequences. The rhetoric about SES managers having to nurture their staff sounds a little APSC to me – not just Australian Public Service Commission but All Platitudes, Seldom Convincing. The APS made a move to grab the worst of private sector practice, and all it got hold of was a capacity to develop and recruit dud managers with motives that have nothing to do with actually providing service. It didn’t grab the whole of the private sector structure, just an ability to place into important positions people with simple financial motivations and no appreciation of the objectives for which they worked or the possibility that their staff might include people whose motivation was a little more textured.

For some light relief sprinkle Senacot in her coffee ever morning…..

Sasha some people are nutters, and it will only destroy you trying to take them on.

My ‘boss’ used to ring his friends and talk about me while I sat at the next desk. He’d say ‘the albatross is still sitting there – ooh no, now she’s packing up for the day.’ etc. Meanwhile he never spoke to me, only emailed long diatribes about my deficient hours of work. Every time I tried to talk to him he’d say he was busy, and to come back at 3.00. Every day at 3.00 he was out for coffee. The rest of the time he’d surf Sydney real estate online.

I don’t think I even did anything to annoy him – I was a new starter. I think he was bored, and doing it to see how long I would last or something.

Sometimes you just can’t win, and it isn’t worth the effort of trying.

Thanks everyone, very much appreciate the comments and advice. I’ll post again as things develop …

Here’s why:

my manager stated with a lot of cruel mirth that the grad was now on a slow track to annihilation and now had no future in the department.

Who would want this done to them? A job isn’t worth your self-esteem or sanity.

This lady has said that she likes the job – so why are people telling her to get out? Managers – SES or otherwise have an obligation to nurture their staff and if someone is being sidestepped for promotion and or there is a skill atrophy, this is bad for the whole department and the manager concerned would be derelict in his or her duty if they do nothing about it. I would still approach this person before throwing in the towel eg I’ve noticed that things are working as well as they should. What advice do you have. Can we put in place a plan to put me back on the fast track? If no response, you could say, perhaps we could do this in conjunction with the Dep Sec or whoever. They’ll soon get the message.

VicePope, yes I tried the union way too. As a result of the head of the union demanding that no mediation or talks take place, I resigned my membership and haven’t held it since. He cracked it because I complained about management doing nothing. Yet if you look at the last EBA, he signed off on the part that referred to mediation in such circumstances.

I have little time for the union now.

Besides, the union is out for themselves. They don’t care about the bullying issue, or they would have more guts to deal with it period.

In my case, I also spoke to the staff equity contact officer at my workplace, still nothing.

We both know that there are people out there who can do what they want in our profession and get away with it.

Now I choose to be a staff equity contact officer to try to protect others from the same crap I went through. No one should be made to feel like that.

swamiOFswank12:53 pm 09 Sep 07

Anyone thought of junk-mail bombing? It’s easy. You just need their home address, and then follow these simple rules:
1) don’t pay for postage
2) don’t send anything they’d want

What you do is sign them up for every coupon you can find in every magazine that is ‘postage paid’. This way you can send a ‘yes! please have the Mormans visit’, free samples of incontinence pads, all kinds of time-share apartment invites, financial seminars – the world’s your oyster.

Next, go to the home shows, the motor shows…and sign them up for all kinds of things (nothing they can win a prize from though).

Get them onto the Time-Life mailing list. The Readers Digest mailing list…you name it.

Get your friends and family to help. Do this for long enough, and they’ll either have to move house, or get a PO Box.

Either way, you’ve had a lot of fun, it’s cost you nothing, and its inconvenienced them to the max.

Sooooo worthwhile.

Nyssa

The union has been known to arrange for people to accompany others to meetings like this. Someone from a different workplace/site is an option that can make sense. (I have been asked to sit in on a couple just to witness a record of discussion). But really it’s about the relative positions/power of those doing the monstering and those being monstered.

One difficult manager that I dealt with was a ludicrously intelligent and articulate professional whose staff walked when they could and went on sick leave when they couldn’t. The person simply did not realise that the reason for the turnover, sickness rates etc was the person’s demeaning, angry style. (I was at a meeting where I was told that better was expected of me, because unlike X, another person at the same meeting, I had some idea and some brains). Things got better when it was pointed out (which took courage and some support), but someone had to bell the cat.

Far worse was a smiling psycho who managed upwards, had the grasp of function of a chimp, cloned in similar people. That manager had a deeply set and totally inaccurate self-image of tolerant, competent management. Pointing out the facts was an obvious sign of looniness. I got help and bailed out – the agency moved the person to another agency after a while when the cluelessness became obvious.

Ant – any clues as to the novel?? Is it set in Canberra?

My bully now has no staff, which is interesting, but I’m not sure if it happened accidentally, or if they worked him out. He seems to be doing ‘special projects’ now. hehe.

Masquara, I would try to befriend all other managers around you – try to seem really enthusiastic about what they do, and say you’d love to work in their area for a bit to gain experience. And try really hard not to badmouth your current boss until you are out of there. (and even then try to stick to the occasional really subtle barb (eg – She tried hard, but she never really seemed to understand X, y, z) – you’ll look like you have an issue if you go on and on about them.

VicePope, I did that too – take a witness.

Shame she too was harassed for doing it.

It’s not always a ‘fair’ playing field.

ant, my website – The Trouble with Teachers (ad is on RA) – is about workplace bullying in education. Not many people are willing to speak out. They’re afraid they’ll be ‘done’ for doing it.

Shame really as silence makes it worse.

Ingeegoodbee7:40 am 09 Sep 07

Move. You have complete control over what you can do and achieve – almost none over others. Getting out is your key to surviving.

As far as the reference goes – seek peer references, and if you’re not confidant with getting somthing decent from your manager go above them, like the section head, branch head or division head be ready to discus your work and provide examples to support your performance/competence – any decent senior manager should be able to give you a good reference if you walk them through it. Talk to someone you trust in HR first and walk them through your exit strategy – they should be supportive, if only for selfish reasons given that helping you into a new job is goinging to be way easier than dealing with a workplace bullying sh!t-fight.

Vic Bitterman12:25 am 09 Sep 07

I do agree with the above comments totally. Go find a new job, just your strings. You’ll feel so much better!

And before you do it, make sure you sign the slag up to as many porno and spam mailing lists as you can possibly find via Google. Call me petty….

My particular bully wrote a novel… about bullying. At an institution close to home. So I figure he experienced it, and then played it out when he was in a position to do it. like I said, weird and intelligent.

Yeah – I never thought it would happen to me either. And i never thought I would have cared if it did, but they grind you down. My workforce monster was definitely intelligent and wierd. He was bored at work, so he used to pick on people for fun.

For the reference, can you try any past supervisors? Or just go for acting roles in your current area, so you won’t need referees to get those, and then you will get referees there.

Or in desperation get a friend at a past workplace to say that you reported to them in some way, and write you a reference (even if you just did some small aspect of work for them once in a while).

I’d move quickly – if there’s a change of government – or even an election called, new jobs will dry up for quite a while.

Look at all the posts this topic has elicited. I’d say there’s a big problem, a very big problem! It’s a shame we can’t email each other… although some of the advice here (actually, most of it) is excellent.

I’m now in the strange position where bullying can’t touch me, for 3 reasons (which I shan’t hint at). And that which did not kill us does make us stronger. but I still look back at the whole business with astonishment, and I get very angry when I find others are copping this.

Someone set up a “dob in crap drivers” site for the ACT. I think that someone needs to do the same for bullies in ACT region workplaces. I suspect that some of the bullies would be nominated by more than 1 person. And the best bullies are intelligent, and weird.

Nyssa: This is why you take a witness along if possible. You also need to know precisely what you will say, in a measured way, and to have the strength of purpose not to be deflected from it. The “sin” for which one can be considered for misconduct is failing to act with courtesy.

It is, however, a judgment call. Some monsters are just too big and bad, and some otherwise normal people run away from asserting themselves.

I remember that Workplace Psycopaths book. when it came out, I was ticking off the “signs” one by one. I’m still amazed I ended up in that position, and what happened. and our boss, after my complaint, got us both in to “talk it through”. He went into psycopath mode, she saw it all, and did nothing. After I left, his next bullying target told me that he just took up with her where he left off with me, and the director still did nothing.

However, there are many departments and businesses that just don’t have that crap going on, or protect it. the reference thing is a stumble, so think laterally, who else can you ask? Or, play nice, ask for her advice etc, just to get her near enough so that when you need that ref. report, it won’t be a biggie. Also, when giving ref. reports, I have to tell you (from the other side) that most givers are very conservative. To put it plainly, most are sh!t scraed of giving a negative one for fear of being held to account (ie sued) for it later. Don’t worry unduly about that one.

Play it safe, go for a dead-easy job at level somewhere else, and get your head and soul back together.

Solution: Tell the teacher

VicePope, it would be nice but as I have already said, if you speak out you can be done for misconduct and literally ‘blackballed’.

I was “threatened” with that for speaking out and one of my cousin’s works for the CT!

Ruby, I also know what you mean. I could do so much more in my job but I am hindered by people who only want ‘suck ups’ and I have the moral fortitude to disagree.

Masquara, I recommend the book “Workplace Psychopaths”. I can’t remember the author’s name but it got me through my ‘issues’ because it named the behaviour and gave me steps in which to protect myself until I left.

I’d chat with the person – in a non-confrontational way. Yes it is possible eg talk about what you like about the department but mention that you are a newbie and want her advice about what you can do to fit in better. People love that shit ie when you ask their advice. Turn your enermy into your friend and bury this – until the day she is working for you!

Getting references can be hard. I have sometimes given “peer references” for colleagues/frequent contacts who were having difficulty with their managers. Talking to contact people about jobs that interest you can be an opportunity to flag this issue and suggest alternatives to what may be a degrading/patently insincere reference from the monster. Applying for jobs when you know the monster will be unavailable is another option.

By the way. I know at least some people from the Canberra Times keep an eye on RA. How about a Public Sector Informant feature on workplace monsters or a capacity for readers to provide verifiable horror stories from the public sector workplace?

Ruby Wednesday9:04 pm 08 Sep 07

Now, for a more comprehensive response. I worked for a particular state government since I started university. I had four years at a job I really liked, but needed to move for a job that was fulltime (the other was permament for several days a week, but other days were on an as-needed basis). I moved to work for the police service. I had one job where I liked the guys I was assisting in the legal office, but the manager’s idea of resolving disputes in the office (of which there were many longstanding ones) was to ignore them. I moved to another section after being told off by the manager for having a can of Coke on my desk, because one of the other women in the office didn’t like it. The next manager had a similar approach to management as it was a call centre and we were all just interchangeable to him. I stayed in that section for a year working 24/7 rotating shifts, and then moved again to a job with not a whole lot to do and a manager who didn’t give a toss. I had a degree, and knew I could do a lot more than the filing, photocopying and typing that they seemed to decide was all young women could really do.

I then took a very risky secondment. It was only for three months, but it was to the state parliament’s committee office. If, after three months, there was no need for me, I would have had to go back to the second section (a police call centre). I went, and that experience got me thinking about a whole new career path that is relevant to my admittedly not-very-career-enhancing English Lit degree. Because of that three month secondment, I got the experience to beef up my resume that allowed me to put in for a far, far better job down here in Canberra at PSL5 level, which was a big jump from AO3 in pay.

I’m finally doing real, interesting and challenging work, not just administratively supporting those who are doing the work. I’m not saying my current work isn’t without issues–it does have some–but I took a chance to get out of a system where I would always be seen as a PA and nothing else, and that one secondment opened my eyes to a whole career path that I am really enjoying. If I’d have stayed, I’d still be bitching and moaning about my old managers and their ineptitude. Sure, they couldn’t manage their way out of a paper bag, but the system isn’t going to make them change. Don’t worry about jumping around until you find a job you enjoy and where the managers are somewhat competent. They do exist!

Ruby Wednesday8:52 pm 08 Sep 07

If you do resign and move to another department, do take advantage of the exit interview that most agencies are obliged to offer. You’ve already got your reference and a new position, so there’s nothing to lose (assuming you don’t want to come back to that agency in the near future) in telling them exactly why you are leaving.

I’ve been where you are, Masquara, and tried to help others, and so I can honestly share your pain. At the bottom of it all, I agree with others who have suggested you move elsewere. This is not a bad time to be looking, and I’m sure you know reliable people who can tell you about workplaces where there are at least some sane people at the top. I work in one, and I know about a couple of others.

Recent years have probably produced more short-termism, groupthink and simplistic belief in money and promotion as motivators than the past. It will end, but it may take years to flush the idiots and their supporting networks of cowards out of the system. A change of government may get a few out at the top. Most of them will move on before the collapse of the self-aggrandising structures that they have created. There are a few reasonably general and accessible books about psychopaths in the workplace that might let you know.

Some observations. You have less power and will probably not win – any complaint will be looked at by one of the monster’s peers, who is more invested with protecting the organisation than with acting fairly towards you. The Australian Public Service Commission is of almost zero value and your individual concerns will be treated as being below the dignity of any of its staff. The union can still be quite effective in some workplaces, and joining might give you at least a feeling of support. Many organisations retain a de facto sane person in their SES level management (often without ambition but with real internal credibility) who can intervene and speak frankly – is there one in yours? Most organisations have Employee Assistance Programs staffed by counsellors who can suggest coping mechanisms and may support a move elsewhere.

If you would prefer to stay and fight, you should know that the compensation avenue has probably dried up. Most managers will die before admitting that one of their peers acted in an inappropriate way. One way that can work is to arrange a meeting (take a supporter if possible) and state as clearly and neutrally as you can what it is you find unacceptable. It may make the person recognise what is happening, or it may make them aware that you are not spineless.

Making notes of every interaction with the psychopath can be an effective way of creating a bit of cold sweat. Try not to drag others into the battle – they will not appreciate it and may turn on you if threatened. Soliciting others to your cause is seldom a good move.

Be brave. Keep your head above water, even if you must keep it below the parapet.

Wow, you have got to get out of there NOW. I am not joking. You won’t win this one. Just get the hell out: transfer, get seconded, whatever. Be quiet, and be swift.

Why? I’ve been there. I didn’t get out, until it was too late, and then I did the ultimate get out, I resigned (for something a lot better I must admit). without my dream job to head to though, I wonder where it would have ended?

Most APS areas do not have good managers and supervisors, so what is happening to you won’t be recognised, and it won’t be dealt-with. People might even realise what’s happening, but NOTHING WILL HAPPEN. You can’t beat city hall. The only chance of bullies like this being beaten is if a number of underlings band together and take action. And the APS (and other big companies) tend to protect their senior staff.

Don’t cling on to a job you like, in a poisonous atmosphere that is going to poison you. Just fade out of the picture. Seriously.

Once you’re out, then explore what you can do to beat that bully. She’ll move on to others, guaranteed. And wherever she’s come from, there will also be people she’s trashed. Strength in numbers.

I have seen peoples’ lives destroyed trying to fight systematically entrenched organisational bullying.

GET OUT – you will never change this woman or the culture of the organisation you are working in; it takes a very brave maverick at the absolute top of the food chain to manage such a task.

Don’t sacrifice your own wellbeing with this shite. Take one of the gazillion great jobs that are around at the moment and make your future success your victory over the loser who is bullying you now.

I agree with everyone else- get out. If you then still want to work in the job one rung up, you can get the promotion elsewhere, then move back sideways. Probably though, you’ll find something else just as good.

I had a sh*t boss who gave me absolutely nothing to do, and then used to tell me off if I left early. I was used to being busy, and being my own boss, so hanging around late with nothing to do seemed ridiculous. He started to make me doubt myself, but as soon as I moved sideways I felt 100 times better.

In a way I feel guilty that I didn’t make official complaints against him, in case he continues to do this to others, but in reality I was new to the department and it would have reflected badly on me. I didn’t want to look like a whinger. He was surprisingly well liked too – although not so much now.

Anyway – I got out by applying for every ‘acting’ role I could even halfway do. I didn’t actually get one, but by putting my name out and sending my resume around to managers with vacancies, one eventually offered me something else. And now I have no shortage of decent referees.

If you don’t get out, you may never get to that job one rung up, cos your current boss may not provide a good reference at the crucial time. Best to test the waters now – you never know – she may be glad to move you on and write something glowing anyway.

It may be possible to get out with a good reference, depending on how you handle it. This is someone who obviously doesn’t want to see you advance, so she won’t help you for an upwards step, but she might help with a sideways step if you frame it as “wanting to gain more exposure to other portfolio agencies.” That is, nothing critical of her (employ a bit of suckup about how you admire her breath of knowledge if the relationship isn’t too far gone for that to be plausible). You can write an email, to both her and her manager, to the effect that you have benefited a lot from your time there (gag) and want to get some extra exposure and start working on succession planning, with a timeframe of 3-6 months, and can you all meet to talk it over? You’ll probably impress her manager with your consideration for the department and graceful handling, and might be able to get a reference there.

Another option is to put up your hand for short projects that take you away from your immediate manager and put you under someone else’s supervision – even if it’s just for a half day a week for a month or two. Then you’ll have that person as a possible referree as well.

I so know this topic.

I’d get out. Don’t hang around, get out for your own sanity.

The system won’t care that you’re a victim, they’ll only care about their bottom line.

They won’t care if the bully has a history of bullying staff, as long as their work is good, they won’t be reprimanded. Hell, they’ll even be promoted!

The bully won’t care, they’ll see it all as ‘sport’ and gladly watch your health deteriorate.

Furthermore, anything said in public will be taken by your employer as misconduct and you can be punished for speaking out, even on here……

I’m not in the PS, but assuming it works similarly to private enterprise:

Everytime you feel uncomfortable, write the situation down, including times and people there. Document everything, especially the small incidents. The natural tendency is to document the big ones because they feel more important, but it’s actually the small ones that are more important for the later tribunal in establishing a trend of continuous intimidation and a culture of acceptance. You want to show that it wasn’t just a few isolated incidents.

Once you have several incidents documented, make an official complaint about the culture or the bullying to HR. It will establish your bona fides (sort of) and at least start the process before your manager is able to complete their chain of intimidation that is designed to remove you.

Accept that the likely outcome is that you will move positions. It’s highly unlikely they will move the manager instead of you unless others have the same problem.

Having said that, the incident with the manager disclosing gossip that is critical of another employee is very unsavioury and would be a good case to document.

Don’t let them wear you down. Adopt a position of righteous indignation. You will be moved so don’t try and accept the unacceptable in an attempt to prevent conflict, your relationship with your manager is already over.

I agree with basically everything that’s been written so far – time to move to a different department entirely – SHITLOADS of jobs around at the moment.

Loosebrown absolutely hit the nail on the head WRT working with good people, too.

I agree with the theme of the responses here. I was in one team and ‘counselled’ by a manager for non-performance of duties. This was almost immediately after I began my career in the public service, when I probably needed a little guidance as opposed to disciplinary action! Thankfully I was moved to another team where the manager was amazing – very supportive and gave opportunities to her staff to try new work and develop new skills. About six months later I won an award from the departmental secretary for my achievements in her team. I think the moral of this is that if you are in a team where you are not ‘in’ or feel you are being bullied – move to another team, or look for a new job. I don’t care how good the work is, if your manager is a bully or incompetent then it will suck.

I have now come to the realisation that now I really don’t care what work I am doing – as long as I work with people I like. Life is too short to have anxiety attacks, etc because of an oppressive work situation.

And there are so many jobs out there at the moment! You could ask someone higher than your current boss for your reference.

Trouble is, how do you move to a decent alternative job without a good reference from current manager?

Move… drongo! Why the flock would you hang around when there are hundreds of jobs on the gazette. Don’t imagine for one moment that your area is the only chance you’ll have of finding interesting work. Most PS jobs above the ASO3 level are as interesting as you choose to make them anyway.

You will only continue to lose out by hanging around in an area where someone has got it in for you. How do I know? I was in the same boat until the last two months when I was shunted over to another area. For the first time in years the effect of the bitches from hell has been left behind and I amd recognised for my abilities, not the rumours that old molls have been circulating behind my back.

I have to say I agree with Chester.

Felix the Cat3:29 pm 08 Sep 07

Chester might be on to something there…
Women bosses seem worse than men for some reason in my experience (I am male).

Felix the Cat3:27 pm 08 Sep 07

I’ve been in a similar position myself previously and found it a no win situation.

# 1 Rule – the Boss is always right
#2 Rule – if the Boss is wrong, see rule #1

It’s not right but it’s how life works.

There are two ways in which to remedy the situation, one is for you to find another job in a different area/dept or, # 2, hope that she does.

Eventually my position was made redundant, “officially” I had a period of 3 months to find a job elsewhere within the dept (supposedly with the help of HR) or take the money and run. I hung around for a couple of months and HR kept finding all these jobs that were nothing like the one I was doing and ones I had no experience of qualifications for so I decided to take the money and run. The other thing was that even if HR found me a job then my old boss could have a word in the ear of my new boss and tell her/him that I was an incompetent arsehole and after the 3 month probation period they could sack me and I wouldn’t get any redundancy money.

The only thing to do is to be proactive about the situation yourself and not rely on HR, Secretary, Union delegate or anyone else to look after you. When push comes to shove everybody will look after their own interests first and yours second.

Gosh you’ve picked my special subject area!

Short answer: Do yourself a favour and get out of the PS and get out of Canberra. Find a way to go into business for yourself. You’ll work a lot harder, you’ll still have to deal with morons but you’ll have the satisfaction of being able to tell them to simply f@*k off rather than kowtow to them.

This town runs on the culture of mediocrity. If you already know half a dozen 10 year olds who demonstrate more intelligence and maturity – and it sounds like you do – I’m afraid it’s all down hill from here. And worst of all while you see a bunch of adults (and inevitably they run in packs) acting like spoilt, ill-behaved brats, they will be drunk on what they believe to be their sheer cleverness the whole time they’re doing you.

They are the modern Chinese mandarin. They’d drown in the bath if they didn’t get in wearing their floaties. They are the equivalent of men with very, very tiny d*@ks which is probably the underlying problem a good many of them are experiencing. Don’t even get me onto the weird species of frigid bitches who seem to derive some kind of perverse sexual pleasure from it. WTF is that all about???!!?

Oh and nepotism is alive and well, see. ccraven.blogspot.com

Hey I was a paying customer. As an employee you don’t stand a chance. No point moving up or sideways. Out is the only escape. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

PS And I rate that post as a piece of classic chester. Clear, succinct (relatively speaking) and straight to the point. 😀

Use the word ‘Naturally’ when being subtly bullied.

It’s dismissive, and it passes the perception back to any listeners that you are more competent than the bully.

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