13 September 2013

ACT Policing declares war on shift workers

| johnboy
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There’s little in the world quite as exciting as a new police campaign.

This tweet was particularly exciting:

It lead to something even more exciting, a new video inciting paranoia against shift workers and the growing ranks of people who work from home!

God forbid anyone lead a life not conforming to ACT Policing’s grim little view of life.

But what should we expect after this March’s sex war upon the hipsters,

God help a shift working hipster.

screenshot

UPDATE FROM BARCHAM: I just went and visited their stall in Garema place during my lunch break, where I was equipped with powerful knowledge to help me defend my neighborhood.

BE AFRAID AND SCARED OF TOMATOS

It’s hard to see, but that shed has tomato plants in there.

I am now scared of people with curtains, sheds, gardens, cars, fences, or any job that isn’t 9-5 Monday to Friday.

In short, I am now convinced everyone in Braddon is a drug dealer.

I’m on to you lot!

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Barcham said :

Man I hope Octopus Wheelbarrow Humperdink becomes a “thing”.

Well I hear that he has a ‘thing’ going with Skywhale.

Man I hope Octopus Wheelbarrow Humperdink becomes a “thing”.

beardedclam said :

YeahBuddy said :

I was driving along Tillyard Drive yesterday and realised (in horror) that every house is harboring drug dealers and meth labs. ALL curtains closed at 4pm in the afternoon.

What’s the number for CrimeStoppers again?

haha, except if you did that along Tillyard drive, the cops would probably be pretty successful……

I’d give them a 20% success rate – most of which would be on the lower Charnwood/Flynn end of the road.

YeahBuddy said :

I was driving along Tillyard Drive yesterday and realised (in horror) that every house is harboring drug dealers and meth labs. ALL curtains closed at 4pm in the afternoon.

What’s the number for CrimeStoppers again?

haha, except if you did that along Tillyard drive, the cops would probably be pretty successful……

I was driving along Tillyard Drive yesterday and realised (in horror) that every house is harboring drug dealers and meth labs. ALL curtains closed at 4pm in the afternoon.

What’s the number for CrimeStoppers again?

Stevian said :

IrishPete said :

johnboy said :

Chillout people or I’ll have to put someone in the naughty corner.

I think I like FrankieBT. He reminds me of Borat. Surely Stevian deserves the naughty corner? In fact I assumed he spends so much time there, that you charge him rent.

IP

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink

Can we just abbreviate this to OWH?

IP

Comic_and_Gamer_Nerd7:25 pm 16 Sep 13

Pork Hunt said :

FrankieBT said :

Stevian said :

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink.

Which in one of those languages means: Go make the sex with yourself.

You, Sir, are a champion and you will go far on RiotACT. Love your work so keep it coming.

I lolled pretty hard.

You win, frankie.

FrankieBT said :

Stevian said :

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink.

Which in one of those languages means: Go make the sex with yourself.

You, Sir, are a champion and you will go far on RiotACT. Love your work so keep it coming.

IrishPete said :

johnboy said :

Chillout people or I’ll have to put someone in the naughty corner.

I think I like FrankieBT. He reminds me of Borat. Surely Stevian deserves the naughty corner? In fact I assumed he spends so much time there, that you charge him rent.

IP

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink

FrankieBT said :

Stevian said :

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink.

Which in one of those languages means: Go make the sex with yourself.

So the answer is: Yes

thebrownstreak694:09 pm 16 Sep 13

IrishPete said :

Eyeball In A Quart Jar Of Snot said :

Nobody picked up on the former WIN TV journalist turned actress?

I thought I recognised her, but not being an aficionado of commercial television, never mind their inane news programmes, I would never have placed her.

I am sure she was a great newsreader, but I don’t think she’s a very good actress.

IP

Who is she?

johnboy said :

Chillout people or I’ll have to put someone in the naughty corner.

I think I like FrankieBT. He reminds me of Borat. Surely Stevian deserves the naughty corner? In fact I assumed he spends so much time there, that you charge him rent.

IP

Ghettosmurf873:43 pm 16 Sep 13

Stevian said :

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

+1

It’s all well and good to speak lots of languages, but there’s not much point writing posts that are not comprehensible. It is next to impossible to work out what you are actually trying to say in your posts across the site, which sort of defeats the purpose of posting at all.

Stevian said :

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

Octopus wheelbarrow Humperdink.

Which in one of those languages means: Go make the sex with yourself.

Chillout people or I’ll have to put someone in the naughty corner.

FrankieBT said :

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

.

Are you as incomprehesible in the other three?

Holden Caulfield said :

Sammy said :

Does DSE know they stole their branding?

Dick does drugs!

(I noticed that too.)

So that would be Dick’s Meth?

Holden Caulfield11:57 am 16 Sep 13

Sammy said :

Does DSE know they stole their branding?

Dick does drugs!

(I noticed that too.)

Ah. I see my quote marks take out what policeman have say. He say to man standing near me: This is for media, not public.

Ok.

Humblest of apology to Mr Smurf. I speak four language of which English is fourth. How about you?

Thank you for warm welcome to your multicultural inclusive city. Week 2 and all is well….well….as many in your country have me warned.

Ghettosmurf8710:44 am 16 Sep 13

FrankieBT said :

I was of mild interest in these event on Frijday but the Corbell person was speaking to media but no loudspeakers for publics to hear. I hear policeman say to someone who ask: <>

Ok.

Please type your posts in coherent english

I was of mild interest in these event on Frijday but the Corbell person was speaking to media but no loudspeakers for publics to hear. I hear policeman say to someone who ask: <>

Ok.

They forgot to mention ‘iffy’. Drug people, I’ve heard, tend to be a bit ‘iffy’. So watch out for that, too.

Heh, the house i grew up in, my neighbours which r still there are drug dealers/pros. The cops raid her house like every six months and they still cant put her away. Maybe after her kids hit 18. It sucked ever since they moved next door.

Pork Hunt said :

Eyeball In A Quart Jar Of Snot said :

Nobody picked up on the former WIN TV journalist turned actress?

Not Mr G’s type…

Mr G’s type will be easy to pick: she’ll have her curtains drawn all the time, and will have lots of surveillance around her house.

Does DSE know they stole their branding?

I always kept my curtains drawn on the old house while at work, you know, to stop people looking in and deciding my big TV and Xbox would look better in their lounge room than mine. I’d also keep the eaves down all summer, because the house was a god damn sweat box and I needed to keep as much sun out as possible.

Must of been because I was trying to recreate Breaking Bad at home though…

Eyeball In A Quart Jar Of Snot said :

Nobody picked up on the former WIN TV journalist turned actress?

Not Mr G’s type…

Eyeball In A Quart Jar Of Snot said :

Nobody picked up on the former WIN TV journalist turned actress?

I thought I recognised her, but not being an aficionado of commercial television, never mind their inane news programmes, I would never have placed her.

I am sure she was a great newsreader, but I don’t think she’s a very good actress.

IP

Queen_of_the_Bun8:37 am 14 Sep 13

DrKoresh said :

Spitfire3 said :

“If you’re not doing anything wrong, you’ve got nothing to hide.”

Doesn’t mean that it’s anybody else’s business though.

I think you missed the irony.

Eyeball In A Quart Jar Of Snot11:22 pm 13 Sep 13

Nobody picked up on the former WIN TV journalist turned actress?

HardBallGets11:21 pm 13 Sep 13

Exactly

Aeek said :

Concerned said :

tim_c said :

Can’t you see it guys?! A brand new flash car, next-door neighbour has CCTV surveillance… I’d be “Concerned” too. 🙂

so what are you trying to imply…. that because a young person works their butt off from 13 years old to buy a decent but certainly not flash car that they must be drug dealer??

I thought it was a humorous attempt to link the two threads, on one hand we have the police disappointing people like your daughter, on the other we have this campaign wanting something from us. Maybe if they disillusioned people less, this advertising would be taken more seriously?

My apologies… I didn’t read it like that at first but now you’ve mentioned it I do.

Right now I just feel like the police in this town are a joke… Don’t do anything to help… But then want us to do their jobs

I rented a house in McKellar after I split up with my horrible ex wife. A few weeks after I moved in, another dude moved into the house next door.

He put up 6 foot high colorbond fences all around his new house. Then he got a giant slavering savage rolling eyed monster dog the size of a horse that I thought might gnaw its way through the colorbond. He never walked it or anything, and he obviously hated it based on the shouting I heard from his yard, but no sane person would ever have gone into that yard while the dog was there.

People constantly came and went from his house at all hours. And I mean noon, midnight, 4am, whatever. Constantly, all hours.Some of them seemed pretty skanky, and others seemed to be teenagers with vast amounts of money. One regular teenage visitor drove a late model Mercedes sedan with a custom aparkly metallic-fleck paint job, lowered suspension, fluffy dice hanging from the rear vision mirror and a number plate that read “Mr Big”. I swear I’m not making this up.

Although it never occurred to me at the time, I now suspect that I may have lived next to a drug dealer.

Concerned said :

tim_c said :

Can’t you see it guys?! A brand new flash car, next-door neighbour has CCTV surveillance… I’d be “Concerned” too. 🙂

so what are you trying to imply…. that because a young person works their butt off from 13 years old to buy a decent but certainly not flash car that they must be drug dealer??

I thought it was a humorous attempt to link the two threads, on one hand we have the police disappointing people like your daughter, on the other we have this campaign wanting something from us. Maybe if they disillusioned people less, this advertising would be taken more seriously?

tim_c said :

Can’t you see it guys?! A brand new flash car, next-door neighbour has CCTV surveillance… I’d be “Concerned” too. 🙂

so what are you trying to imply…. that because a young person works their butt off from 13 years old to buy a decent but certainly not flash car that they must be drug dealer??

‘I’m cooking up verse, officer, on the muse’s glorious hotplates.’

Love that headline.

FXST01 said :

Yes let’s all ridicule the Police for being proactive and actually trying to do something about drug dealers and manufacturers.

Yes, lets!

FXST01 said :

Yes let’s all ridicule the Police for being proactive and actually trying to do something about drug dealers and manufacturers.

They’re not though.

They’re encouraging the public to be proactive and try to do something about drug dealers and manufacturers.

Yes let’s all ridicule the Police for being proactive and actually trying to do something about drug dealers and manufacturers.

Can’t you see it guys?! A brand new flash car, next-door neighbour has CCTV surveillance… I’d be “Concerned” too. 🙂

I’ve never seen the curtains open across the road. There’s also 4 uni students live next door. There’s people there all the time. AFGestapo

The gov still think we’re convicts.

Judging by those yellow speech bubble signs with that font, the AFP appears to be linking Dick Smith stores with drug lords.

I think the man visible at the window in a gas mask should be a bit of a giveaway.

But now we know how to get the police to turn up to thefts from motor vehicles – go to the neighbour’s house and dob yourself in for having the curtains closed during the day.

IP

So, not everyone in Braddon is a drug dealer, just a user?

The police could bust a few dealers and their clients by watching the payphones around Braddon ..

Aeek said :

kea said :

Jeez, we’ve always been in the habit of closing the curtains when we’re out so that nobody can see in the windows.. or sometimes in summer I keep the curtains closed to keep the heat out..

and on these cold days, to keep the heat in.

Then you may be a drug dealer and not even realise it! Do you or someone you know, use curtains?

Then it may be too late………..Curtains KILL!!!! (by proxy in the way everything is connected in some way)

Hopefully it will never get to this ridiculous stage and we become Fortress Canberra®.

For them to say that curtains may be a sign of nefarious deeds being hidden is drawing a pretty long bow. I really hope that it is all a joke.

I suppose you could say spermacide is a form of genocide by that same logic (better get the boys down in legal to look at that one) and logically these genocidal wankers need to be stopped, but it wont happen because it is silly premise to base anything on and realistically, no one would want to try to cuff criminals until they washed their hands.

One could effectively stay on the run for weeks if they didnt wash their hands.

I say this because with this mentality, even owning them would make you susceptable to unwanted scrutiny by John Q. Law and being able to make them could make you a criminal empire or even less likely, a potential choice of skill-sets if they make an Oceans 14.

Linus Caldwell: So this new guy, whats he do?
Danny Ocean: Whats PBO do? I’ll tell you what PBO does, PBO makes a mean set of curtains and he is gonna be the one hiding us from unwanted attention.
Linus Caldwell:He can do that?
Danny Ocean: He’s doing it right now, have a look. Can you see anyone out those windows?
Linus Caldwell: Daaaaamnn!

I really there will not be any roadblocks or car searches when I do my Lincrafts run because I am now afraid that my overlocker will count as drug paraphenalia and I will only be able to by denim in sex-shops (except it would probably be called something different like Sensual burlap or Rough rider cotton from then on and black stone wash denim would be the material equivalent of a black guy).

Looks for the signs, chemical containers and strange smells……

“Every time you make a cup of tea or coffee you are doing chemistry,” he says. “You are extracting certain materials you do want from those you don’t want – you don’t want to crunch your way through coffee grinds to get the delicious coffee taste.”

The easiest way to tell if your neighbour is a drug dealer is when you hear the dodgy music playing in the background when you walk past their house.

Updated with photos of the Civic event.

Spitfire3 said :

“If you’re not doing anything wrong, you’ve got nothing to hide.”

Doesn’t mean that it’s anybody else’s business though.

I know several people with those roller shutters on their windows. God forbid you use them for their intended purpose…

That’s the frame they chose as the thumbnail?!

kea said :

Jeez, we’ve always been in the habit of closing the curtains when we’re out so that nobody can see in the windows.. or sometimes in summer I keep the curtains closed to keep the heat out..

Yeah, that’s what all drug growers say.

kea said :

…or sometimes in summer I keep the curtains closed to keep the heat out..

This one is a good point. Same at my place. Looks like the coppers are going to be busy this summer – and they think they’re overworked now….

My unit faces east-west, and has sliding doors and windows at the front and back of the unit.

My TV sits in front of my front sliding door, and so I’ve got the curtains closed nearly all the time.

I’ll be expecting a visit from the po-po soon I guess?

kea said :

Jeez, we’ve always been in the habit of closing the curtains when we’re out so that nobody can see in the windows.. or sometimes in summer I keep the curtains closed to keep the heat out..

and on these cold days, to keep the heat in.

“If you’re not doing anything wrong, you’ve got nothing to hide.”

wildturkeycanoe1:05 pm 13 Sep 13

I’d better roll up my garden hose, clean up those buckets at the side of the house, stop going shopping and get a cheap rubbish car. Also have to remember not to use garlic whilst cooking and stop being so paranoid.

Jeez, we’ve always been in the habit of closing the curtains when we’re out so that nobody can see in the windows.. or sometimes in summer I keep the curtains closed to keep the heat out..

So, security cameras and fancy cars = drug dealer. Riiiiight….

Ah, I love the ‘snitches’ tag, JB. 😀

Now that I think about this, a lot of coppers could well end up with their neighbours grassing them up.

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