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Canberra too ignorant and un-australian for AFL?

johnboy 2 June 2009 74

Over on The Roar someone called Pippinu has had a lengthy spray on the unworthiness of Canberra, or Sydney for that matter for “the Australian game”:

    One positive for Melburnians is that they get to have a bit of a look at their old MCG scoreboard which will bring back many memories.

    Apart from that, Manuka, and Canberra generally, has very little to offer the AFL, and they should leave the city, and its bureaucrats, to the other codes.

    The lack of understanding and appreciation for the Australian game in Canberra is only rivalled by one other city, and that is Sydney, who are on the verge of getting a second team, when they barely deserve the first one.

Are we unworthy?

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74 Responses to Canberra too ignorant and un-australian for AFL?
Woody Mann-Caruso Woody Mann-Caruso 1:06 pm 03 Jun 09

To get to a league ‘scoring range’ you get six attempts while 13 big men try to smash you into the ground, passing the ball in the opposite direction to the target the whole time. To get to an AFL ‘scoring range’ you just need to be prancing somewhere in the area (no positions, no offside – who has time to remember all that _and_ their first name?) and have the ball bounce off you (or the opposing team, who cares?)

pippinu pippinu 12:55 pm 03 Jun 09

But the scoring range is the full width of the playing surface – that’s pretty wide.

Fortunately the ground is the size of a postage stamp so the fat boys don’t have to run too far (because if they were playing aussie rules, they’d be sucking in the big ones within two minutes of the ball up).

pippinu pippinu 12:52 pm 03 Jun 09

You mean I’ve been under the illusion all my life that the game is Australian?

I will desist from calling it the great Australian game forthwith.

Woody Mann-Caruso Woody Mann-Caruso 12:50 pm 03 Jun 09

Aww, you can do better than that, pippy.

A league goal is 5.5 m wide and 3m off the ground. If somebody manages to kick the ball through that elevated, narrow target they get a whopping 1 point.

An AFL goal is three sets of posts, each 6.4m wide. You can dribble the ball on the ground from right in front of the goal and get 6 points. Hell, it could bounce it off an opposing player’s head and go through the posts by fluke and I’d still get a point for effort – the same as a league player gets for hitting a much, much smaller target from much further away. We’d say ‘that’s ar$e’ but you call it a ‘behind’ so nobody’s feelings get hurt.

AFL is a special sport for special little boys who need to feel special about everything they do, including missing. The whole game has been built around incompetence:

“I can’t run without fumbling the ball!”
“That’s OK – we’ll make it a rule that you *have* to drop it while you’re running!”
“I caught it! I actually caught it!”
“That’s super! OK, everybody stop while little Fernando gets a free kick for being such a special winner!”
“I tried to kick it in, but it bounced off my face instead.”
“There there precious. You can get a point anyway because you’re daddy’s special angel.”

Thumper Thumper 12:48 pm 03 Jun 09

I actually really don’t care.

But it’s funny reading the arguments for and against.

chewy14 chewy14 12:45 pm 03 Jun 09

No Thumper it was actually an aboriginal game played by the natives or whatever the AFL want to come up with this week, to prove the game is actually Australian.

pippinu pippinu 12:43 pm 03 Jun 09

that’s certainly part of the mythology of the great Australian game.

Thumper Thumper 12:41 pm 03 Jun 09

And of course Australian Rules where only made up so that cricketers had something to do in the winter.

Thumper Thumper 12:40 pm 03 Jun 09

I should add that I reckon it would great if we had a Canberra team in the AFL comp.

Canberra Cougars anyone 😉

pippinu pippinu 12:39 pm 03 Jun 09

Well Thumper – then you know what I’m talking about – your team mates can’t kick over a jam tin.

pippinu pippinu 12:38 pm 03 Jun 09

If the scoring target is 21 metres wide, you clearly are not getting a score for a miss, so anyone insisting that is even stupider than the fish in the barrell.

How wide is the try line 70M? 75M?

Thumper Thumper 12:37 pm 03 Jun 09

1. they can’t hit a barn door with eithe a kick or a handball
2. they can’t kick over a jam tin
3. they can’t kick on the run without doing a little hop (and then lolly pop it straigth up in the air)
4. they just can’t kick full stop.

I can. With both feet as well. I used to play at State level juniors many years ago before switching to league, and then union.

I can’t stand watching AFL these days.

pippinu pippinu 12:36 pm 03 Jun 09

The concept of the try was created once the incapacity of a rugby player to kick the ball thorugh the sticks was duly noted.

Woody Mann-Caruso Woody Mann-Caruso 12:29 pm 03 Jun 09

Does it matter if it misses? I’ll still get points anyway, won’t I? It’s amazed any of you are even born – your fathers would’ve been satisfied to get it between any posts.

Toying with you AFL numpties is like shooting particularly stupid fish in a very small barrel.

pippinu pippinu 12:25 pm 03 Jun 09

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

Look, there are obviously some hurt feeling here. How about this – you stand 15m over there, I’ll kick a ball to you, and if you can manage to catch it without dropping it, you get a Special Prize and we all get to call you ‘Mark’. That should make you feel warm and fuzzy.

I’ve played plenty of footy in regional NSW, and have come across fat boys like this bloke, who think they can stroll up and trick up a kick as easy as pie. But this is the problem with such fat boys:

1. they can’t hit a barn door with eithe a kick or a handball
2. they can’t kick over a jam tin
3. they can’t kick on the run without doing a little hop (and then lolly pop it straigth up in the air)
4. they just can’t kick full stop.

So when this fat boy says, stand 15 m away and I’ll kick it to you – will it get anywhere near me? because my experience with fat boys is that they can’t hit you on the chest from 15 m with anything approximating a half decent kick.

Better still fat boy, what say you stand 65 metres away from me and try and get the Sherrin anywhere within my vicinity (I’ll be standing there all week and it won’t happen)

pippinu pippinu 10:09 am 03 Jun 09

wow – I’m famous!!

Holden Caulfield Holden Caulfield 8:45 am 03 Jun 09

Keep on digging Woody.

stace8383 stace8383 12:28 am 03 Jun 09

I drove past Manuka oval on Saturday afternoon, must have been just at the end of the game, and despite having lived in the area for over a year I’ve NEVER seen it so busy as it was then. I tell ya, it was AFL in Canberra and it drew a heck of a crowd. I can only assume that, since half of Canberra used to live in Melbourne, we’ve brought the hysteria with us 😉

vg vg 11:06 pm 02 Jun 09

Nothing like objective sporting argument

bd84 bd84 11:02 pm 02 Jun 09

It’s funny for a City which everyone claims to be no proper market for the AFL, that the majority of people you meet around the place do follow the AFL and also have a favourite team. It really does show in the attendance records that the AFL home and away games held here have larger attendances than 90% of the Raiders home games.

Just watching the NRL drill the nail into their own coffins is more interesting than watching a dozen or so sexed up morons run around throwing the ball to each other like little girls with absolutely no thought or skill about it. I understand why they need the cheerleaders at the NRL games, to wake the 5,000 people up for the second half of stop start, stop start, stop start.. ZzZzZzz. There’s no real suprise why attendance numbers for the AFL more than double the NRL and club membership for most AFL clubs is at least 3 times higher than any NRL club.

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