5 July 2009

Confusing a young lady

| grownupman
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So last Friday, I was getting out of work. I was in a meeting so I was wearing a suit, which ended up being perfect.

I was waiting at a crosswalk near Mooseheads in civic, and this lady wasn’t paying attention and walked into the street. She would have been about 30 to 35 years old. The street was pretty empty in both directions except for a bus in the outside lane that the lady didn’t see. The bus was coming in pretty fast, and I don’t know how she missed it, but to her credit there was some cars and vans that may have obstructed her view.

Anyway, just as the bus started honking and slamming breasks, I grabbed her and pulled her back. Should have probably made it anyway, but it made a pretty nice dramatic effect.

So this lady was really freaked out by the whole thing. She was sorta stuck in between thanking me, and catching her breath. So (and why I did this ??), I pulled out my PDA and said “This is Commander Navarrette, I saved the subject. The time is 5:12pm.” She had no idea what was happening and kept looking at me all dumb. So I said something to the effect of, “Miss, I need your signature to affirm that you were here and I stopped you from getting run over by that bus.” (I had seen startrek the night before).

I didn’t know what she thought about the situation, but I decided to press it a bit further. I opened my pda’s drawing pad and asked her to sign it, which is did.

I thanked her then followed up with “Your grandson is very important,” which immediately I reaslised was really dumb because she didn’t look like she was old enought to have grandchildren.

“I don’t have a grandson,” is all she said. I freaked out for a second, thinking I had just made a total ass of myself. But then I said “you will,” and gave her sorta a wink/smile.

The road was clear and I quickly crossed. She shood there for a few seconds and yelled out “wait!” but I was already in the carpark making a b-line for my car and pretending I didn’t hear her.

I have no idea what she though of the whole thing, but there was a number of people around by the end who looked a tad suspicious about what I said to her.

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embarassing!

haha Fraud how does it feel to be caught out?

Speaking of oddly butchered plagiarism on blogs, I was perusing the grauniad today and found this:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/jul/06/charlie-brooker-random-babble-crowdsourcing

The comment by Tamalti at 1.43am looked disturbingly familiar. cf:

http://the-riotact.com/?p=6791

Do you know anything about this, Maelinar?

It was, I was the young lady who was the subject of this story..Or at least was dressed like..does that count ?

damnintellectuals1:19 pm 06 Jul 09

Boo! I wanted it to be real.

Funny, but something was off from the second sentence.

“I was waiting at a crosswalk…”

Woody Mann-Caruso11:31 am 06 Jul 09

John Titor told me you die alone, crying like a little girl.

Don’t know what’s more sad: the mature adults here who don’t condone the use of humour on the streets or the case of plagiarism.

haha! Nice story, shame it wasn’t your own.

You sir are a tool!

Thanks for the entertainment all the same.

eyeLikeCarrots10:01 am 06 Jul 09

Badgers dont wear pants, and neither should you.

Does RiotAct condone plagarism?

Hells_Bells748:19 am 06 Jul 09

I was blonde natural and otherwise for far too long to take humour in confusing a young lady for your own super-nerd entertainment and it clearly doesn’t take much to make you laugh!
Then to read it’s ripped off, smacks in the face of how unfunny you are.

this story reminds me of potatoes

Ivan76 said :

A funny story made even funnier because its a blatant word for word rip-off..

That’s the odd thing, in the RiotAct version he misspells brakes as “breasks”.

shenanigans, shenanigans, shenanigans!!!

A funny story made even funnier because its a blatent word for word rip-off..

Thanks for the research there Zig…….. Hillarious!!

Looks like a few here have found it a “tad suspicious” also!

#16!!

follow the link.

OMG how tragic is that – the guy lifts someone elses story and posts it on RiotACT

Not awesome at all

This is so awesome that I am in awe. Dude, if I ever meet you, I am buying you a pint of good scotch 🙂

Rawhide Kid No 27:35 pm 05 Jul 09

How cool is that ?

Nice one, and your follow up is very amusing. Well done.

Nice save, but yes, you did make an ass of yourself.

How old are you ? In earth years ?

VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy6:46 pm 05 Jul 09

I can’t wait to see one of these buses fitted out with breasks!

Now, to convert that ‘k’ to a ‘t’…

SamTSeppo said :

This isn’t the first time you’ve done this, eh, time traveller?

If he’s a time traveller, perhaps he hasn’t done that one yet . . .

Oh, man! Well, that is disappointing. I am disappointed.

This isn’t the first time you’ve done this, eh, time traveller?

LOL you made my day! We need more grown ups like that!

Err it was a good story, then came the 2nd part where I think you need to seek some professional help. I’m surprised she didn’t start screaming for help thinking you were some weirdo trying to abduct her

Reminds me of that scene in True Lies:

And your codename will be…
[hopeful] Natasha?
No…… Boris

Well done, Commander Navarrette. You have secured the future for us all. Proceed with Phase 2 of your assignment.

Beautifully done, I love your work.

Keep it up.

I love it!! Awesome!

: D

Don’t ever grow up. Despite the fact that it went to your head, you still really are a hero.

Which one of us doesn’t have the kid inside deep down still hoping the spaceship will land in the back yard, and life will become special and exciting? And if they don’t, they’re probably not my kind of people ….

Cheers!

amusing, and yet can’t help but cringe

Matty Sullivan2:15 pm 05 Jul 09

Mooseheads is great. Try Academy next time. Most of the insipid debutantes who go there would think you were Batman for pulling a line like that.

10 points for enthusiasm, another 10 for pulling it off.

Was her surname Connor? : )

Nice. I’ve often been tempted while walking down the street to put my finger to my ear and say something like “subject heading north-west on Bunda St” into my watch. Just for funsies.

they don’t have spellcheck in the future, but at least they have chivalry… ; )

barking toad11:58 am 05 Jul 09

In what bar was your meeting?

Nicely done, that’s awesome

You’re not very grown up are you man? Good save.

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