10 January 2010

Dealing with noisy neighbours

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Hello all.

For more than two years I have lived in a rather nice and quiet block of units. There are not too many of us. Some are owners, some like me are renters. I get on well with my neighbours. I make a point of never doing anything to my neighbours that I would not want done to me. I regularly ask them if any noise I am making is disturbing them, and they do likewise. In short, it is a great place to live where most of the time all is in harmony. Or at least it was until a couple of months ago.

On the opposite side of my courtyard a woman moved in. Older, with some grey hair. Almost immediately she started playing her television up late at night at a volume that was not excessively loud, but loud enough to be heard very clearly in my unit at night, even with my door to the courtyard closed. So I went around and politely asked her to turn it down. Which she said she would. But she didn’t. A couple of nights later, after having endured some more sleeplessness I go around and politely ask again. And I do mean politely.

This woman immediately gets irate and insists I come in saying that her television is not making any noise. Only it is not only making some noise, it is making quite some considerable noise. I try to point that out to her, but she stands there and yells at me that it is not, and is clearly getting quite irate. I explained that from my courtyard I could hear her television over my own television and invited her to come listen to it but she won’t have a bar of it. She insisted she was not making any noise and is clearly now very angry at me. So I decide to leave and say that the next time she has the television up I’ll call the police.

I have to admit I was pretty unhappy at her aggressive behaviour, and her total inflexibility in admitting she was making noise. Well, so begins two months of living hell.

This woman started to play her television up loud from the moment she got home to the moment she went to work the next day. That is ALL night, EVERY night. 🙁

Now I need my sleep, so I did the only thing I could do, which was to call the police. One night I had to call them three times because after they left (I could hear them talking to her at least once) she just turned the television up again. I didn’t want to annoy the police over what would seem to be a trivial thing. but when you get only 3 hours sleep a night, then some one keeping you awake is no trivial thing. To make it worse, she was clearly repeatedly playing a dvd or video as I soon came to recognise repeated sound tracks and words. This woman was playing some show over and over again!

I’m not the only one affected. My other neighbour who is an insomniac also heard this and we’ve spoken about it. Initially She was kept up by the incessant coughing of the noisy neighbour.

Anyway, before Christmas I contacted my real estate agent and the Queanbeyan Council about the issue. Thankfully the real estate is looking in to it. They can sympasise with the issue, and as I’ve always paid my rent on time and never done anything wrong, as well as looking after the place, they value me as a tenant. So I thought things were on the up and up.

Then this morning I get a knock on the door and there’s a couple of police officers wanting to know if I turned off her fuses this morning. Of course I have not. Though the thought had crossed my mind several times. Why the heck would I climb out of bed when I am sleeping, to turn off the woman’s power though? Early morning is the only time I ever get any sleep. Besides which, as a public slave I know full well that I could loose my job if I do something, anything illegal, and subsequently am extremely law abiding. I mean here’s this rather nice and polite police officer explaining how we all have to make allowances when we live in close proximity and I’m standing there thinking I know that, I live by that, I hope he told her that as well. I was also thinking that I’ve called them enough, they should know by now that if I have an issue with this woman the first thing I’m going to do is call them, not play with her fuses. It also occurs to me that some of my neighbours simply don’t have my patience and have probably flicked the fuses to shut her up. This silly woman has probably put 2 and 2 together and come up with 16.

Then again, as I said, the thought had crossed my mind, but if I was going to resort to sleep deprived insanity I’d make a proper job of it and take to the fuse box with a nice insulated hammer and reduce it to small unworkable parts and then I’d yank out the cable from it to the meter box ensuring that she could not have power for weeks. But in reality, I’ve always been a pacifist, and it is far simpler and easier to just move if she insists on continuing to make noise.

So, I’m in the situation where I barely get any sleep, the noise is enough to keep me awake, but not loud enough to be heard from the street. Ear plugs are not effective, and give me instant headaches. If I leave the courtyard door open I get a full blast of the TV. If I leave it closed I boil in the heat and can still hear the television. I’ve called the council, I’ve called the police (lots), I’ve spoken to my real estate agent who is progressing. Now I’m being falsely accused of flicking switches which may or may not have even happened (anyone crazy enough to play their television all night and isn’t a shift worker, is probably crazy enough to make stuff like this up to cause me trouble). On top of that I’ve become so fatigued I’ve had to take time off work, my doctor has prescribed sleeping tablets and I have noticed I am not as focussed driving as I normally am. I’m basically a walking zombie.

The frustrating thing about this though is that this woman has not bothered to do anything reasonable to come to a compromise. Right from the start she said she’s made no noise. Instead she could have spoken to me calmly instead of being intimidating and we could have worked out any number of compromises. She could have used teletext on the television, headphones, wireless headphones. If she needed the television on to get to sleep why not use a timer to turn it off when she was asleep? Why not close her courtyard door at night?

If anyone knows of any approaches I have not yet taken to remedy this situation please let me know. They have to be legal though. While I may have evil thoughts of jumping up and down on her television that will not solve anything. In the mien time I will probably have to spend yet another night sleeping in the heat in my van in the back yard.

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Hey Panic!

Besides which, as a public slave I know full well that I could loose my job if I do something, anything illegal, and subsequently am extremely law abiding.

Whatever happened to your wonderful website urbanadventure.org
You took it down and told everyone they were silly children?
You forgot to mention the fact that tresspassing was almost a professional hobby for ya mate.
Your site helped people and you just taking it down means someone else has to put a spidered copy back up.

catchya n00b

Sorry, here is the link to my page: http://retfordhall.blogspot.com/

Hi there!
I have read your post, I know exactly how you feel. This women is a bitch (to be polite).
I have exactly the same problem, so far, nothing has worked, I have tried every thing. Internet and bad publicity could be the answer…
I created a blog out of this, have a look, you are welcome to leave a comment at the bottom of the page.

I have a suggestion. Write a polite letter and get all the tenants to sign it and put it in her mailbox. If that doesn’t work, get everyone to knock on her door. If that doesn’t work get everyone to call the police so at least they know it’s not just you.

Did the same many years ago with a neighbours dogs (chiwawas), who barked incessantly all day and night at imagined boogiemen.

By Chiwawas do you mean Chihuahuas, or is that a different breed of dog? I’m honestly not trying to take the p*ss out of you either. I just want to know if is the same breed or not as I saw a few Chiwawas advertised for sale and I didn’t want to buy something that is smaller than a rodent.

UrbanAdventure.org said :

Well I am moving soon.
Last week two scratches appeared down the side of my car one morning, and some of tthe plants in the courtyard seem to have died with the look of having been sprayed by something. 🙁

I lived for one month in a block of units in Queanbeyan – never again. Really sad to hear that you’ve decided to move out, and that your car has been damaged too.

So as a parting gift, squirt some http://www.liquidass.com/ into the air vents of her car. It will last for ages.

🙂

Grrrr said :

Two thoughts:

White noise. Get a cheap pedestal fan for your bedroom and turn it on high. It’ll provide plenty of pleasant sounding noise which will cover up outside noises .. and cooling on hot nights.

Go over there and complain each and every time it’s too loud. Take your digicam and put it on movie mode if you want evidence of the old lady beating you up.

Even better, brown noise……….or was that a myth?

Been following this thread with some interest. Having experienced a week of sleep deprivation, I know that it can stuff with your head big time. Fortunately I’ve never been in the same situation as you Urban, so unfortunately I don’t have any sagely advice for you.

It shouldn’t, but it never ceases to amaze me how some people are completely ignorant of how they may be affecting other people around them.

UrbanAdventure.org6:46 am 18 Jan 10

Well I am moving soon.
Last week two scratches appeared down the side of my car one morning, and some of tthe plants in the courtyard seem to have died with the look of having been sprayed by something. 🙁

@urban – I’ve been there. I can understand 100% how you’re feeling.

@Katitonia – you are a legend, frankly you’re an even bigger legend for using TCM for the screams (screams don’t come better than those from TCM).

I went 6 months in a newly leased one bedroom unit with a nightmare student neighbour beneath me who would nightly (yes, I said nightly) use his residence as a meeting place for as many people he could cram in. Sometimes the yelling and shouting would only go until 10-11pm sometimes (if they were high) the noise would go on until the wee hours of the morn. I’d equate the noise to being like living above a nightclub or bar. For the record I’m based in Canberra, don’t know if there are differences in tenancy laws out your way but the Canberra laws were written simple, clear and easy to understand (and they tend to cover all manner of problem situations).

I started by talking to the resident, noting the impact of the noise on myself personally and politely asking if he could ensure his friends would tone down the noise later at night. I repeated that process three more times, by the fourth time it was clear that he wasn’t particularly happy that I hadn’t already given up. I ‘endured’. I ‘endured’ until I started to walk into walls at work (yes, I really really did that’s what actual physical fatigue does to your system) and began slurring my words when I was speaking to people on the phone. Still, I ‘endured’ until it literally got to the point where I would have to find a quiet place at work and try to sleep because I couldn’t focus on anything. At that point I contacted my agent and thus began the process of dealing with the noise maker more directly. This went on for about two months (I tolerated the lack of sleep for four miserable months believe it or not).

Given that I was already up at 3am on a Monday night (Tuesday morn) I would simply note the type, volume etc of noise then collect the fortnights worth of disturbance records and put them all in an email to the agent and point out to them that in order for myself to pay my rent I needed to be able to actually work to earn a living and, in order to do that I needed to obtain some level of sleep after hours. The times were a record to indicate that that was totally impossible (I was also trying to ‘case build’ to go to the Residential Tenancies Tribunal to see if I could have my tenancy contract ceased). The agent (we shared an agent – this action would normally be done via the body corporate) delivered three breach notices to the tenant across I believe a month and a half period (six to seven weeks – the tenant had two weeks to correct the behaviour and never would).

The ‘motives’ of the tenant in breach are irrelevant, all that matters is that they are in breach of a legal contract – the notices are ‘notifications to comply’ with the tenancy contract. Lack of compliance results in eviction. In my case the tenant actually acknowledged that they were making the noise but said that they viewed it as a ‘right’ – that as they were paying rent they could do whatever they wanted at whatever volume they wished whenever they wanted. Even the agent became flummoxed by this behaviour. The behaviour did stop upon delivery of the final final final notice. That behaviour did cost me dearly though.

For the record I also began calling the police quite regularly and (in Canberra) they were eventually quite supportive (and responsive) there was little they could do but by including them I was able to further my case that the behaviour was out of control. No, using the police is not a waste of their resources it is (and was) a highly effective way to advance the problem to its eventual solution and they were happy to do it (got to know the coppers who would man the phones locally quite well). Locally, I also used the canberra govvie ‘Yer TV’s too loud’ mob (mentioned previously I think) who sent a notice to the tenant and (I believe, upon my request) to my agent. All helped to support my case.

I couldn’t just walk out because I’d be in breach of a newly signed tenancy agreement and (frankly) moving does cost money and after having moved in I couldn’t just ‘move out’ over night. I like staying within the law myself, aint nothin’ wrong with being someone who honors contracts, agreements etc (whether your a public or private employee). I did play music very loudly once or twice whilst I knew the tenant beneath me would be sleeping to ruin their day (as they’d ruined my night) but I never much liked meeting fire with fire (where no fire should have existed in the first place) and besides it never stopped the behaviour for more than a day.

People consistently told me to ‘toughen up’ or ‘tell the agent to evict them’ (wow, brilliant ideas!). Deprive the toughest person of sleep for an extended period of time and I’ll show you a quivering pathetic bawling baby who’d do anything for just one period of unbroken sleep. As one of my fellow staff said after asking me why I looked like death warmed up one day, ‘sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture’ – yes, it sure as hell is. Your feelings are not abnormal, not irrational and most importantly – not your fault (doesn’t take more effort than turning a knob or pressing a TV button to rid you of this problem does it and yet that seems unlikely or just ‘too difficult’ for the other party to do).

I think it’s pathetic that you have to go so far as to request to mediate with this tele-bully, I don’t agree with the negatives posts against you thus far and (after my own experience) I’m not interested in considering anyones ‘other side of the story’ (remember, there are ‘laws’ there for a reason, ‘laws’ are not options they are ‘laws’). (In my best Clint Eastwood voice) Law says you should have the right to enjoy your residence in peace, she aint playin’ the laws game so feel free to use the law to remind her that while she may be queen in her own lounge room she’s as beholden to the law as are you or I in regard to what she does in that loungeroom (and as to how that behaviour affects the people around her). I say this as a person who did just that myself, in my own way (and with the help of a variety of people – all the peoples I could muster to assist me) over the course of several months. If you leave then all that happens is that the next poor tenant who moves into your vacated residence unknowingly cops it when they move in (and that my friend is how I ended up in just the situation that you’re experiencing now – and that’s the ‘third’ side to this story, the one where the next tenant in line has their life ruined too).

Happy trails to you my friend and to her, Yippee ki-yay M*********!!!!

WonderfulWorld6:09 pm 16 Jan 10

A couple of years ago I received bongo drums for Christmas. We also used to play the radio in our garage, not what we thought we loud, but was on a lot as we came in and out of the house gardening and playing with the kids. We received a letter in the mail from an ACT Government place, unfortunately I don’t have their name at hand, but I would be surprised if the police didn’t advise you to contact them.
They came to our house and measured the decibals of our radio and the bongos to the back corner of our fence. We then knew what the acceptable and allowable limit of our radio and bongo playing was, and it was a different level depending on what time of the day/night it was. Basically we were advised that during the night, say after 10pm our talking level from our back deck to the boundry line fences was the acceptable level for the radio and bongos.
It was a good learning curve as prior to our neighbours complaint we did have the noise higher than that. We are long term owners in the area, and I guess other neighbours were OK with it, but we were considerate and changed our ways with the new neighbours present.
Long I know but bascially I’m suggesting that there are other legal agencies that do deal with this and for ACT/Queanbeyan I’m sure it would be in the yellow pages.

Sorry can’t help with the name of the agency itself but was local government.

Urban – anyone who enjoys driving around documenting perceived traffic infringements has some issues. You also sound depressed – I suggest you seek some counselling. Google SANE Australia – you won’t find much quality advice here.

I love #55!
“Get one of those citrus no-bark dog collars and put it around her neck. You could stick bling on it and call it a necklace. If she makes too much noise, it’ll give her a squirt. Or better yet one of the static shock collars. They come with remotes that work over 100 meters. That way you can zap her from your bed, or your bathroom, or out on the street in the car.”

ROTFL!

Document everything. For 2 or 3 weeks, write down the date and time of every interaction with and reaction from your neighbour. Present your real estate agent (and your neighbour’s) with the information and break your lease if you can’t manage to get her evicted.

Buy a Sonic Nausea device from eBay (yes, they are legal). They actually work! Leave one near an open window of hers.

Two thoughts:

White noise. Get a cheap pedestal fan for your bedroom and turn it on high. It’ll provide plenty of pleasant sounding noise which will cover up outside noises .. and cooling on hot nights.

Go over there and complain each and every time it’s too loud. Take your digicam and put it on movie mode if you want evidence of the old lady beating you up.

OK, she isn’t frail and aged. She hasn’t taken steps to turn down the noise. The Police aren’t interested as they view it as a neighbourhood dispute.

Have any of the different types of earplugs that have been suggested work?

Have you tried approaching Conflict Resolution?

Seriously, the lawful path has failed, time to take matters into your own hands. Start blaring your own music when you suspect she is sleeping, provoke her into attacking you and have her charged with assault, contact the strata and attempt to get her removed (your RE agent thus far has proven useless), contact a lawyer, get the neighbours together to angrily confront her (mob style for max intimidation), grow some balls or ur gonna have to gtfo.

Asking twice is about right. Once should be enough for any normal person to take notice.

UrbanAdventure.org7:48 pm 13 Jan 10

Oh, and I forgot to point out, despite her age, this woman could quite easily cause a lot of harm if she attacked anyone. She’s not aged and frail.

UrbanAdventure.org7:46 pm 13 Jan 10

Mordd said :

UrbanAdventure.org said :

You chose to delibretly ignore where I wrote that I politely spoke to the woman first twice and *she* got agressive at me. I a not going to risk her assaulting me. I don’t now her, I don’t know if she is harmless or if she will fly off the hanle at me. As far as I am concerned, once she gets agressive, it is better to play it safe and have the police deal with the issue.

No I didn’t miss that part at all. You’re defence of “oh I don’t know how she might act, she might attack me” is ridiculous and lame though. She is quite elderly as you mentioned, when was the last time a 60yr old? was it woman physically attacked you? If she flew of the handle at you asking her nicely to turn it down, maybe she didn’t view the way you asked as being plilte but as aggressive and thus she responded to you in kind. Not even going back and trying to talk to her again though, but instead calling to call the police night after night, is not only doing nothing to solve the issue, but is simply ridiculous. If you really are that scared of her attacking you, why don’t you get another neighbour or friend to go with you and try going to talk to her again. You are simply avoiding dealing with the issue in one of the many ways suggested to you here UrbanAdventure. A troll I may be at times, but in this case I am not trolling, I am continuing to ask the same questions i’ve asked in my previous posts to try and shed some light on the other side of the story. Theres always 2 sides to every story my friend, and you started out by saying “im a public servant so i never break the law” lost you all credibility in my eyes. Its up to you to prove you have done everything reasonable to talk to the woman, not expect us to take it for granted, and frankly you obviously haven’t attempted to talk it out in full yet.

Okay, sorry for calling you a troll.
But honestly I politely approached her twice before calling the police. She’s not in her 60s, she’s probably about mid 50s. Yes, a lot older than me granted, but I’ve also been the victim of several compleatly unprovoked violent attacks in my life, including being shot at and being stabbed in the shoulder, so I am quite scared of people who yell at me and who get agressive.
I am a public servant, and yes I am extreemly law abiding. I have no criminal record what so ever, and only ever had one parking fine for overstaying in a two hour parking spot and even then I was legally allowed to stay there for twice the displayed time as I had a disabled parking permit.
I have never had a complaint against me made by any of my other neighbours, and communicate very well with them.
I have tried speaking to this woman twice politely.
I have contacted a mediation service and requested their assistance. They have written to her.
I have contacted the Queanbeyan council who have totally neglected their responsability to do something, and have not visited the woman, claiming that if noise occours at night it is a police responsability and that they can do nothing.
Instead of taking the law into my own hands and doing something illegal or stupid, I have followed the guidence given to me by the police when I first contacted them which was “If it happens again, let us know” which I am beginning to realise might perhaps mean “we’re just telling you this to be polite, in reality we don’t want to deal with this.”
I have used foam and silicon ear plugs and both block the sound to some degree but both make my ears feel like they are on fire and cause head aches.
I am now spending most nights sleeping in my car, and only getting limited sleep doing that.
On Tuesday I was so tired I could not go to work and had to take a day off without pay.

I am really loosing hope and perhaps my sanity with this. I have done everything a reasonable person could do here. I’ve acted with politeness and good moral intent. I’ve followed the guidence of the relevant authoraties. I really can not cope with this much onger. I find myself on the verge of tears an the sheer imposability of my situation. I know my work is not happy with the time I am taking off and as I am on probation having just started I realise that there is a very good chance that they will not keep me on.

In short, my life is hell, and I just don’t feel like going on any more. If you think I am bullshitting, give me your contact details, you can come over here and see if you still think that way after a week with no sleep.

housebound said :

Universal remote – if she’s asleep, she’ll never know ’til morning.

i like this one!! could really have some fun. Would it work with the next unit though? Haven’t used one before so not sure what their ranges are

UrbanAdventure.org said :

You chose to delibretly ignore where I wrote that I politely spoke to the woman first twice and *she* got agressive at me. I a not going to risk her assaulting me. I don’t now her, I don’t know if she is harmless or if she will fly off the hanle at me. As far as I am concerned, once she gets agressive, it is better to play it safe and have the police deal with the issue.

No I didn’t miss that part at all. You’re defence of “oh I don’t know how she might act, she might attack me” is ridiculous and lame though. She is quite elderly as you mentioned, when was the last time a 60yr old? was it woman physically attacked you? If she flew of the handle at you asking her nicely to turn it down, maybe she didn’t view the way you asked as being plilte but as aggressive and thus she responded to you in kind. Not even going back and trying to talk to her again though, but instead calling to call the police night after night, is not only doing nothing to solve the issue, but is simply ridiculous. If you really are that scared of her attacking you, why don’t you get another neighbour or friend to go with you and try going to talk to her again. You are simply avoiding dealing with the issue in one of the many ways suggested to you here UrbanAdventure. A troll I may be at times, but in this case I am not trolling, I am continuing to ask the same questions i’ve asked in my previous posts to try and shed some light on the other side of the story. Theres always 2 sides to every story my friend, and you started out by saying “im a public servant so i never break the law” lost you all credibility in my eyes. Its up to you to prove you have done everything reasonable to talk to the woman, not expect us to take it for granted, and frankly you obviously haven’t attempted to talk it out in full yet.

Universal remote – if she’s asleep, she’ll never know ’til morning.

Too many comments to read every single one, apologies if someone else has already suggested this. Buy her some headphones, forget your earplugs. I realise that you may not wish to buy the woman a gift, but think of it as an investment in your sleep, and might work towards restoring the peace with this unreasonable woman.

Good Luck

No, I am not a toll Urban Adventure. I am a person who realises that the police will only have very limited powers in this case … and even more limited powers (read none whatsoever) if no laws have been breached.

🙂

Sorry you can’t get the police to do what you want in this situation.

Talking to you neighbour is a good start. Taking steps to reduce the noise (eg wearing plugs) is also a good step. However, as nothing has come from that, try mediation. It is a neighbourhood dispute, not a police issue.

Maybe you should take the fuse out a few times until she gets sick and tired of replacing the fuse, maybe she will stop then.

UrbanAdventure.org9:52 pm 12 Jan 10

Mordd said :

Gobbo said :

Did I miss the post where the decibel level this woman is reaching was given?

Perhaps the Police aren’t doing anything about it because her level of noise is within acceptable guidelines. It could just be the unfortunate design of your house.

Perhaps you could rent elsewhere?

No you didn’t miss it, as far as we are all aware the OP hasn’t made any attempt to measure the noise, although keep in mind the law actually goes off whether the noise is excessive from inside the complainants residence, not a set decibel level. I too suspect though that the noise isn’t actually as loud as made out, keeping in mind queanbeyan is normally very quiet at night and even lesser noises will travel and sound louder that they really are, that would also explain why the police haven’t done much about it, I suspect they walk away each time shaking their heads at the OP and the woman he is complaining about.

You know I did have this problem once myself, I tried talking to the neighbour a few times though instead of calling the cops on them after the 2nd/3rd occasion, and after asking them 3-4 times over the course of a couple of weeks when it was a problem they agreed to move their tv slightly so the sound didn’t go straight out their window and into mine. Fact is this is a “normalm peoblem” in blocks of flats, and in 99% of cases can be worked out by simply being reasonable and willing to compromise and being friendly with your neighbours. Fact is the OP seems to have 0 interest in resolving this through any method other than the police though, so personally I can’t exactly blame the woman for trying to antagonise him further if that is what she is doing.

Ahh, a troll.

You chose to delibretly ignore where I wrote that I politely spoke to the woman first twice and *she* got agressive at me. I a not going to risk her assaulting me. I don’t now her, I don’t know if she is harmless or if she will fly off the hanle at me. As far as I am concerned, once she gets agressive, it is better to play it safe and have the police deal with the issue. The police themselves avise us to follow that course of action. “Don’t take the law into your own hands, call the police” So I have.
Now admit it, anyone who posts the crap you have been postng to delibretly inflame the issue is just a troll.

Gobbo said :

Did I miss the post where the decibel level this woman is reaching was given?

Perhaps the Police aren’t doing anything about it because her level of noise is within acceptable guidelines. It could just be the unfortunate design of your house.

Perhaps you could rent elsewhere?

No you didn’t miss it, as far as we are all aware the OP hasn’t made any attempt to measure the noise, although keep in mind the law actually goes off whether the noise is excessive from inside the complainants residence, not a set decibel level. I too suspect though that the noise isn’t actually as loud as made out, keeping in mind queanbeyan is normally very quiet at night and even lesser noises will travel and sound louder that they really are, that would also explain why the police haven’t done much about it, I suspect they walk away each time shaking their heads at the OP and the woman he is complaining about.

You know I did have this problem once myself, I tried talking to the neighbour a few times though instead of calling the cops on them after the 2nd/3rd occasion, and after asking them 3-4 times over the course of a couple of weeks when it was a problem they agreed to move their tv slightly so the sound didn’t go straight out their window and into mine. Fact is this is a “normalm peoblem” in blocks of flats, and in 99% of cases can be worked out by simply being reasonable and willing to compromise and being friendly with your neighbours. Fact is the OP seems to have 0 interest in resolving this through any method other than the police though, so personally I can’t exactly blame the woman for trying to antagonise him further if that is what she is doing.

Ask the Waldorf how they did it.

Urban, unfortunately, Queanbeyan Police have a disease that is relatively common in such organisations, where they will exert considerable effort in *not* doing their jobs. They also have demonstrated a habit for charging those who are critical of them with offences they have no evidence for, because a case can drag out for months before they’re actually required to stump up and show some justification for their actions.
As for complaining to their Superintendent, he is a worse sufferer of the aforementioned disease than his staff are.

Get the ear plugs – several of us have suggested sources – and give them a whirl.

If they work, problem solved.

If they don’t you’re only down a few dollars and you know you’ll have to move.

Did I miss the post where the decibel level this woman is reaching was given?

Perhaps the Police aren’t doing anything about it because her level of noise is within acceptable guidelines. It could just be the unfortunate design of your house.

Perhaps you could rent elsewhere?

Really, you could have done one of the many other things than to whinge to the coppers yet again.

I suggest you set-up a video camera and ointed in her direction and record her over several nights, and then present it to the authorities

Heard this story some years ago & hope it is not an urban legend.

Similar kind of story but from Rockhampton in Qld.

A shift worker would come home and then play classical music very loudly from 11 pm to 3 am and keep all the neighbours awake. Complaints followed but the guy totally refused to do anything.

Neighbours then got together and hired some good sound equipment and placed speakers right around this guys property. 15 minutes after the guy stopped playing the classical music, just in time for him to go to bed, the neighbours started playing country music very loudly and kept it going until about 7 am. Kept this up for about a week, during which time no one got much sleep.

Result – the problem classical music player was no longer a problem and no longer bothered the neighbours.

I’ve got a similar problem with a neighbours barking dog. We cannot go out on our deck without the dog barking, and he frequently wakes us up at 3 – 4 am. When we first moved in, the neighbours introduced themselves as the ones with the noisy dog, so they were well aware of the problem. I’m thinking about recording the dogs barking, and whenever he wakes us at night, I will phone the neighbour (whatever the time) and play the barking back at them.

UrbanAdventure.org1:10 am 12 Jan 10

Well 1 am, after trying to sleep I’m still awake. She’s still playing her TV, the police have not bothered to come around, funny though, when I was listening to their chanel through the live streaming (http://anwgans.dyndns.org/cgi-bin/scanner/launch.pl) it was remarkably quiet. They seem remarkably reluctant to do anything about her.

UrbanAdventure.org11:38 pm 11 Jan 10

Damn, the quiet was short lived.
It is 11:37 on a stinking hot night and she is at it again. I rang the Queanbeyan police, and then drove down there to report it but I’ve been told that they are too busy to deal with it.
I have run out of sick days, so I expect that as I will be too tired to go to work tomorrow that I will have to take a day off without pay. How is it fair that she can take money away from me like this?
Bugger it for a joke, I guess I do have no other choice but to move. 🙁

Get one of those citrus no-bark dog collars and put it around her neck. You could stick bling on it and call it a necklace. If she makes too much noise, it’ll give her a squirt. Or better yet one of the static shock collars. They come with remotes that work over 100 meters. That way you can zap her from your bed, or your bathroom, or out on the street in the car.

blueberry said :

Musical instrument stores generaly have a huge range of high quality reusable ear plugs.

They also sell TRUMPETS.
Have you seen ‘The Fixer?’ on telly?

This idiot we have had to deal with for years.
Extract from ABC news.
Man guilty of throwing boiling water at partner

Posted Fri Jan 8, 2010 10:00pm AEDT

A 40-year-old Canberra man who assaulted his partner two years ago has now been found guilty of intentionally throwing boiling water at her.

Kenneth James Armstrong was charged with intentionally inflicting actual bodily harm.

His partner told the court he was very angry when she arrived home from work in September last year.

When they got into the kitchen, she said Armstrong broke the lid off a kettle and threw boiling water over her face and upper body.

She told the court Armstrong said “you’re going to get what you deserve”.

Armstrong told the court he had been filling up a bath with hot water and slipped in the kitchen, causing the water to spray over his partner.

Magistrate Maria Doogan said there was no way the woman’s injuries could have happened in his version of the incident.

He will be sentenced next month.

The problem here is the woman is just as bad as the boofhead himself. Taking drugs, booze etc… and going on nightly rampages, we have put up with this crap for years.
When her teenage kids lived with her it was even worse. Burnouts etc…
I wish they would both be locked up, they deserve it.

UrbanAdventure.org8:26 pm 11 Jan 10

Cameron said :

Your other neighbour was kept up by this lady’s incessant coughing? HAH! Please!

I kid you not. My other neighbour is an insomniac, and the lady used to cough quite incessantly. Thaankfully she isn’t doing it now. Not her fault though.

UrbanAdventure.org8:14 pm 11 Jan 10

Ahh bliss.

Last night, just after my post last night, silence, quietness. The TV went off. I got a nice quiet sleep for the first time in ages.

I have to agree with some people, there’s no sign that this woman is deranged or insane. She obviously holds down a job She obviously drives. I think the defanition of an “average” person is one who can catch a bus. When it comes down to it perhaps we should deal with her behaviour, the TV noise, not her motives.

I’m not sure whether it would help your problem much, UrbanAdventure, as it is quite some months away, but I advocate Rigmarole and others suggestions of offering a friendly face. It is amazing the difference a friendly smile can make to someones day!

Rigmarole – Neighbour Day sounds great. Are you aware of anything official happening in Canberra for the day this year? I think you should create a post on RA about this – I would be interested in seeing how others may be celebrating and what they may be doing.

I think that pink silicone earplugs are much better (though more expensive) than foam. Available in some chemists. Don’t get clear silicone – it is much harder.

Crime and Punishment has some useful suggestions on how to deal with unpleasant old women who are spoiling one’s life..

I live in units in Narrabundah and something similar happened to me last year. Happily my neighbour immediately turned his TV down and now when it occasionally gets a bit loud I ignore it, or turn mine up to compensate, as I know he will lower it if I ask.

Your courtyard sounds like a great space to have a get-together for Neighbour Day (last Sunday in March) to bring all the neighbours together and make sure that your noisy neighbour gets an invitation and the opportunity to bring a plate along. That might put her in a better frame of mind.

I’m planning one myself. See more here: . Good luck.

The best ear plug material of all time is Blue Tac.

OF ALL TIME!

Snappy trip to Fyshwick buy some porn and play it non stop with speakers facing her apartment while you enjoy some sleep with the headphones or earplugs in. Coul dalso provide some mild amusement when the Police come knocking at you door with a complaint about the loud sex noises.

I use the silicone earplugs (shiftworker) and they block out the noise created by small children and much better for the ears over repeated use.

neanderthalsis said :

You can get specially made latex earplugs… Try calling one of the gun shops…

Any audiologist can make these for you, and you can choose the level of attenuation you want. They’re very comfy, easy to get in and out, can be cleaned and used again and again.

You can even get them in ‘ear bud headphone’ configurations for blocking out the world when listening to your iPod.

I’d hate to mention this urbanadventure but I’ve been in your situation 2x now, both times living in apartments in NSW, tried everything. Including petitions, letters to BC, police, liasion officers, etc etc etc.
Outcome – nothing happened, nutters stayed and I moved. Peaceful sleep is so important. The inconvenience of moving is worth it – oh, BTW you can actually legally break your lease when this sort of thing happens – without penalty.
Live in a lovely quiet neighbourhood now. In a house….

Mordd said :

Wow, that really is an impressively long whinge, life must be so hard for you….

Ok now without the sarcasm my response is: Awwwww, poor diddums!

Sounds like there is more to the story anyway that portrayed, personally the line of “im a public servant so I never break the law” is just too much for me. Let me put this to you real simple like: Get…. a….. life…..!

I love it! Note to all Canberrans: there are good public servants just as much as there are good private company employees just as much as there are nasty public servants just as much as nasty private company employees. Being in the public service is IRRELEVANT to your character and tendancies to commit naughtiness. C’mon seriously, the only difference between a public servant and a private company employee is who pays you! Work ethic btw (as I have found out over the years) is surprisingly the same…

So anyway, my advice is to buy noise-cancelling headphones. They can be expensive but at the same time you can use them to listen to your own tv show or your own music in the bliss of your own little non-distracting audible world. If you are worried about wanting to hear smoke alarms etc. don’t worry because from what it seems your block is made to the same shabby standards of most new NSW-ACT buildings so your neighbours will clearly hear that noise for you and then wake you up! Easy! In fact why don’t you occassionally burn some toast when you know your neighbour is asleep. Or better still go and catch a cold so you can have an incessant cough for yourself! And don’t worry my friend I don’t think either of these things are illegal.

blueberry said :

Musical instrument stores generaly have a huge range of high quality reusable ear plugs.

They also have a huge range of musical instruments. Have you considered taking up drumming?

I really am amazed at how readily the readers here ascribe the woman mentioned in the OP as the problem with conditions ranging from insanity (“she’s crazy”) to dementia, or even just deafness. As well how everyone just takes as evidence what the OP has said without anyone questioning the OP on whether maybe theyre a tad too sensitive to noise (god I can imagine how they would go living in a lot of places in Sydney or Melbourne, maybe they should move to Tassie for the rural quiet they crave, not the fastest growing town in NSW for the past 5+ years….) and you all just presume this woman has to be to blame and must have something wrong with her that explains why she is obviously so “horrible” to live with. Whatever happened to caring communities, looking after our frail and elderly, and a bit of goddam understanding and common human decency. The OP says they attempted to talk to the person what a whole 2 times before they started calling the police on the woman. If that was me in the womans position I would have been pissed off about that myself. The only half sensible suggestion made in here is some type of mediation with the neighbour, most disputes like this usually can be worked out by sitting down and calmly discussing the issues with a trained mediator. Try common sense before jumping to extremes.

How about when she is actually being noisy when you are trying to sleep, going over and talking to her. If you can have the conversation of “I’m trying to sleep right now, because it’s the middle of the night”, that may get the message across.

I’d be trying some more direct approaches before I formed a committee to get up a petition to write a letter to request someone ask her to quieten down.

I second the suggestion with holding a meeting with the other residents, particularly inviting representatives of the body corporate, and the landlords of both of your properties (and the woman herself, obviously). If there is such a thing as a police community relations officer, their inclusion might be useful as well.

If that doesn’t work out, the other resident who has been discussing the noise problem with you should also be making official complaints and calling out the cops. Obviously someone else has a problem if they’re flipping the breakers.

neanderthalsis9:46 am 11 Jan 10

UrbanAdventure.org said :

troll-sniffer said :

Buy a bag full of foam earplugs. …Hand out some of the plugs to your neighbours as well…

🙂

You can get specially made latex earplugs that are moulded to the shape of your ear and provide a perfect seal. I had a set made a few years back at a gun show and they work very well.Try calling one of the gun shops here or an independat hardwqare store.

Failing that, Ravels Bolero, on repeat, played loudly. The constant repitition will drive her to insanity.

Hi

I totally sympathise. I’ve lived in various locations and have attempted to co-exist with some amazingly obtuse, uncooperative neighbours. The first was a ACT Public Housing tenant who, despite an avalance of first polite then official complaints (including numerous police calls for verbal and physical abuse – one neighbour had to take out an AVO on him) he was never evicted. ACT PH finally admitted they had NO WHERE else to place this person. I sold my flat & moved.

Next place had exactly the type of tenant you’re describing (I wonder if she’s the same woman?! Looks like Mrs Magoo?) Total insomniac, smoked like a chimney, coughed all night and watched repeats of old movies with the TV volume up so loud we could hear every word. We first asked politely, then we put notes in her letter box every time, expressed utter exasperation, talked to other neighbours, got the BC involved etc. To no avail.

We moved out and bought a house. Only to find a german shepard living 2 doors down barked constantly when the owners were away – seemingly EVERY weekend, so from Friday afternoon to Sunday it barked CONSTANTLY because it was so bored and lonely. Thankfully, they have moved just vefore Christmas (best Christmas present I could have hoped for). So, finally peace! Until the next new neighbour moves in?

An official noise complaint has to involve the some PS doing a sound recording to see what level of nuisance the TV is (decibels) to comfirm its an offence. Trying to convince a govt PS to come out at 12 midnight with the guarantee that your crappy neighbour is going to oblige you by having the sound up on THAT particular night is almost doomed to failure – murphy’s law.

The police are useless in this situation. My advice is, unless the BC really takes the issue up with avengence and makes stong demands she change her ways or be evicted, I’d be looking to move. Before signing up for a new place, I’d chat to the neighbours (more than one) and get the low down on any problems. Spend a few nights staking out the neighbourhood to hear/see what your neighbours & traffic are like (sounds creepy but its the ONLY way).

If you can’t move, ear plugs and meditative music (like sounds of the sea) help. Good luck!

This link regarding noise abatement order may help you.

http://www.environment.nsw.gov.au/noise/noiseabatement.htm

This is almost certainly an early onset dementia issue. The fact that she plays the same TV shows most likely a favourite VCR of hers over and over. They watch tv but they usually don’t adsorb whats happening. Also the refusal to acknowledge that she is doing anything wrong and getting annoyed when you approach her about it. Likewise these people can get extremely paranoid and hence accusing you of turning her fuse off. They have a very short term memory and that could be why she said she would turn it down but didn’t.

The other thing is unless you have known the person for a long time and see the changes its not immediately obvious that it could be dementia.

Ive had to deal with this in the past with a family member. If it is the case that she has early dementia coming on there is nothing you can do about this. And my advice to you is move out. The only way this women will get help if no family intervenes is when she gets worse and the govt has to step in and her welfare is looked after by the public trustee or family gets appointed guardians. The thing is this can drag on for several years and its all down hill. Its a terrible disease.

Tell your real estate agent that you are going to leave if they don’t do something about it. Good tenants are hard to find so if they really want to keep you they will do something.

Hi get a petition going with the neighbours, then send to body corporate.

Have you seen this document which details allowed noise standards in the ACT?

http://www.environment.act.gov.au/__data/assets/pdf_file/0013/144112/Noise_in_Residential_Areas_22Sept09.pdf

Oh wait, you said you were in Queanbeyan. Looks like this is your starting point then:

http://www.environment.nsw.gov.au/noise/neighbourhoodnoise.htm

Your situation is terrible. Noise pollution is very intrusive and stressful, and sleep deprivation is crippling.

I agree that this inconsiderate neighbour probably has a hearing problem (per post #3) and is in denial. Perhaps you could gift her a pair of hefty headphones, so she can have the telly as loud as she likes but no one else will be disturbed?

If I were in your circs, I would also ask your agent if they can find you another rental property pronto.

To think that governments want us all living in medium and high density housing. I thank God for the quarter acre block I live on, every day.

Piratemonkey10:48 pm 10 Jan 10

Try a chemist for soft ear plugs.

I would also definately suggest gathering a partition of folks in your complex that are considering moving out due to this woman. Pass it around to every real eastate agent with ties to the complex and the crazy old bat should be evicted quick smart.

This place sells a variety of ear plugs…

http://www2.protectoralsafe.com.au/infoBANK.aspx?SG=6018166&S=4018007&G=2003235

You can find them here…

Protector Alsafe
1/80-82 Kembla St
Fyshwick ACT 2609
(02) 6280 0155

I sympathise with your situation and hope it works out for you.

eyeLikeCarrots9:33 pm 10 Jan 10

Go to any chemist or pharmacy – look for the soft foam earplugs that are bright orange and have a tapered shape (narrow -> wide – not cylinder) and a smooth surface . The best ones are I’ve used for that last 10 years have a concave depression in the bottom.

Don’t wet your ear canal before inserting. Clean your hands and dry them, roll the plug between the tips of your finger, try and twist is 180 degrees (helps as the plug expands in the canal).

Pull the top of your ear out and back to distend the ear canal, gently insert the plug in. Keep your finger on the end for 15 seconds to allow it to expand.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earplug <– DONT get the yellow ones pictured in that article.. they are BAD.

Prolonged use of plugs for sleeping can lead to ear infections and some other wonderful things so dont use the same pair for too long.

UrbanAdventure.org9:08 pm 10 Jan 10

Aaargh! I just don’t get this woman!
For some one who apparently told the police that she does not want to get kicked out, she’s making no effort to compramise, and no effort to be quieter.
Different day, same shit.
Back to the van for another night’s sleep. It is crazy that I’m sleeping in my van and paying rent on a unit.

UrbanAdventure.org said :

I wish In could find some soft ones like I had then. The hard foam ones give me an instant head ache. I’ve tried Bunnings and Magnet Mart and they’ve both got the hard foam ones. If anyone knows where to get the soft foam ones, please by all means post here.

I bought a big container of plugs at the Protector safety shop in Fyshwick and use them all the time when travelling, kids having friends over etc. Not sure if they qualify as “soft” – they certainly feel soft to me – but worth a look because they’re absolutely brilliant – cannot hear a thing. A container of 100 sets cost $25 from memory.

Felix the Cat7:22 pm 10 Jan 10

UrbanAdventure.org said :

troll-sniffer said :

Buy a bag full of foam earplugs. …
Hand out some of the plugs to your neighbours as well…

🙂

I actually quite like the idea of handing them out to my other neighbours. I used some when driving around in Europe back on 2007 and they were great. Parked in road side rests with no issues. I wish In could find some soft ones like I had then. The hard foam ones give me an instant head ache. I’ve tried Bunnings and Magnet Mart and they’ve both got the hard foam ones. If anyone knows where to get the soft foam ones, please by all means post here.

Try Protector Alsafe
Unit 1, 80-82 Kembla St Fyshwick phone 13 2832

http://www2.protectoralsafe.com.au/infoBANK.aspx?SG=6018166&S=4018007&G=2003235

Musical instrument stores generaly have a huge range of high quality reusable ear plugs.

Your other neighbour was kept up by this lady’s incessant coughing? HAH! Please!

Wow, that really is an impressively long whinge, life must be so hard for you….

Ok now without the sarcasm my response is: Awwwww, poor diddums!

Sounds like there is more to the story anyway that portrayed, personally the line of “im a public servant so I never break the law” is just too much for me. Let me put this to you real simple like: Get…. a….. life…..!

Holden Caulfield6:28 pm 10 Jan 10

UrbanAdventure.org said :

If anyone knows where to get the soft foam ones, please by all means post here.

Your local chemist, perhaps.

Good luck, sounds like a pretty crap situation, even if we are only getting one side of the story.

If all else fails, watch the “Communication problems” episode of Fawlty Towers, that will most likely give you a giggle at the very least.

http://www.fawltysite.net/communication-problems.htm

Conflict Resolution Service, ACT (CRS)
Description
The Conflict Resolution Service (CRS) was established in 1988 as a not for profit community organisation which provides dispute advice, mediation, facilitation and community education to assist in the prevention, management and resolution of conflict within the wider ACT community. The service is confidential, impartial, easy to use and mediation is free in most cases. The service is suitable for multi-party disputes such as workplace disagreements and is accessible to those individuals with disabilities and from non-English speaking backgrounds. CRS can also provide Training and Professional Development courses for any size company, organisation or government department. Course content can be tailored to suit the individual needs of the business including role plays and activities which allow participants to relate the theory of the course to their everyday workplaces and situations.
Contact details
Telephone number(s)
Switchboard: (02) 6162 4050
Fax number
(02) 6162 4070
Email(s)
Dispute Assessment: mediation@crs.org.au
Training and Professional Standards: training@crs.org.au
Web address
http://www.crs.org.au
Office address
Level 3 Griffin Centre, 20 Genge Street
Canberra City ACT 2604

Woody Mann-Caruso6:10 pm 10 Jan 10

Get yourself a bowler hat, a crotch protector, some big black boots and a glass of milk.

Generally you can buy the soft foam earplugs at any chemist.

UrbanAdventure.org5:31 pm 10 Jan 10

Eby said :

Have you thought about contacting the Conflict Resolution Service? I believe they can deal with neighbourly disputes.

This is by far the best suggestion. Any idea how to contact them? Google is being too friendly and giving me results from every where but Queanbeyan. I found the conflict resolution service in Google but their web page http://www.crs.org.au/ does not open for me. A phone number would be great.

MrPC said :

She’s probably half deaf and doesn’t know it. To her the volume is normal. Dig up a flyer for your local audiologist, make copies, and leave one under her windshield wiper every day.

I thought she might be, and suggested this to my neighbours and the police, but the police officer who visited on Friday said she wasn’t and he’d tested that theory. Which has me even more mystified as to why she would need her TV up so loud that neighbours can clearly hear it.

troll-sniffer said :

Buy a bag full of foam earplugs. …
Hand out some of the plugs to your neighbours as well…

🙂

I actually quite like the idea of handing them out to my other neighbours. I used some when driving around in Europe back on 2007 and they were great. Parked in road side rests with no issues. I wish In could find some soft ones like I had then. The hard foam ones give me an instant head ache. I’ve tried Bunnings and Magnet Mart and they’ve both got the hard foam ones. If anyone knows where to get the soft foam ones, please by all means post here.

Ive noticed that in a lot of apartment complexes in Canberra there is usually no consideration for sound dampening between units. For example in apartments above the Coles in Manuka I could her my neighbours switch their lights on and off quite clearly through the wall, so them watching the TV at a normal volume level was also very loud. If she is keeping her noise levels in the legally accepted levels for the time of day then here is not much you can do I mean without installing sound dampening products in the walls.

… or move, your sleep is important.

troll-sniffer4:13 pm 10 Jan 10

One more thing, the body corporate/units dwelling laws have clauses stating that no tenant or occupier may cause noise sufficient to interfere with the peaceful enjoyment of another unit or words to that effect, so the managing agent/body corporate can arrange for the matter to be dealt with permanently.

troll-sniffer4:11 pm 10 Jan 10

Buy a bag full of foam earplugs. You can get a box of 200 on ebay for $50.00 delivered. Moisten the ear canal slightly to ensure they slide in all the way and seal the ear canal properly. Then she can do what she likes, you won’t hear a thing. I used them on a recent holiday and there wasn’t single yobbo or truck kept me from my sleep, despite their best intentions.

And yes, a smoke alarm will get through to alert your sleeping brain, it’ll be audible rather than piercing.

Hand out some of the plugs to your neighbours as well… 🙂

Harriet Vane3:30 pm 10 Jan 10

Is she renting? If so, report her to the real estate managing the property. Similarly, report her to the body corporate, who can get in touch with the owner about the issue.

If she is the owner, report her to the body corporate and ask that it be passed on to the owner of your property (or do this via the real estate agent–though, if they’re anything like the property managers I dealt with while renting, don’t expect them to do much at all). The owner of your property has an interest in protecting their investment.

Make sure you get similarly affected neighbours to do the same thing, so it comes off as more than just you complaining.

Have you thought about contacting the Conflict Resolution Service? I believe they can deal with neighbourly disputes.

Did you happen to write this at 3am when you couldn’t sleep?

I think you’ve done pretty much everything that you can do to silence the old bird. Body corporate, council and police. The body corporate issuing a directive for her to turn the volum down or if she is renting it would be the responsibility of the owner of the unit.

I personally liked the idea of jumping up and down on her tv, the fuse boxes of most units are normally on the inside of the unit so it sounds a bit strange that someone flicked the switch, it’s a good idea though! I wouldn’t worry about the police questioning you about it, they did it as their duty to shut the old bird up and keep her happy with an attempt to keep the peace. Even if it was you, they couldn’t do much about it. Maybe do it a few more times and she will learn.

Any chance you can get the women to post her side of the story? Nearly as good as Jerry Springer.

Sounds like you need to drink a cup of cement but I there again I can’t really relate to your issue. 😛

You could try buying one of those “turn off any TV” style remotes and keep turning her TV off when you think she isn’t actually watching it or has fallen asleep.

http://www.universal-remote.net/

not making any excuses however maybe she’s deaf and has no idea how loud her tv is – she may have gotten pissed off with you for pointing out her issues.
i care for a couple of elderly relatives so i know how cranky they can get over losing their hearing as they age – as anyone would.

good luck – hope you find a resolution asap – it’d drive me crazy

I can sympathise with you as the dog next door barked all night (and I mean ALL night) last night and, without aircon, I had to sleep with the window closed – very stuffy.

You seem very pro-active, and that’s great! At least you are doing something and sound very calm under the circumstances. Since you are friendly with the other neighbours, perhaps you could host a units meeting and make it clear you are hosting a meeting so even if she doesn’t show she knows everyone else is meeting. Maybe have a speaker from the police or some issue-resolving type govie person attend. Peer pressure may break her stubborn streak.
Good luck, I really do feel for you. Some people may suggest you just need to harden up, but loosing sleep for long periods, weeks on end is a horrible torture.

She’s probably half deaf and doesn’t know it. To her the volume is normal. Dig up a flyer for your local audiologist, make copies, and leave one under her windshield wiper every day.

the utter frustrations of modern urban living 🙁 sounds like you seriously have done everything you can. my only question which may help with a solution is do you live in a body corporate – if so, report the problem to them as there are rules about reasonable noise etc in body corporates and you may be able to force solution that way ie if she is a renter too, she could be evicted. alternatively, if she is a renter too – do you remember who advertised her place, and report the problem to them?

the woman sounds beyond inconsiderate – ie completely irrational.

How awful for you – if you’re a renter, surely it would be less hassle and stress to move house yourself than try to fix what seems to be an impossible situation?

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