In exciting news I have this night met the most obnoxious oxygen thief of my life.
Not being willing to pay for foxtel I made my pilgrimage like visit to All Bar Nun tonight to watch the Brumbies, one of my guilty pleasures and a necessity of my work.
For the first sixty minutes of the game I endured people standing in places that blocked my view of the screen. I moved as needed, waited as needed, and put up with it because that’s part of being in a shared space.
So imagine my shock and surprise when a gap opened up to spot I could both put my glass down and more easily exchange banter with the cute girl watching the game on her own, and suddenly I’ve got this big bloke in a tight tshirt in my ear.
“You’ve moved so me and my mates can’t see the game.”
I rolled my eyes and moved back to where I’d been.
“Don’t you roll your eyes at me!”
“I’ve moved, but I’ll roll my eyes at whoever I want.”
Angry words ensued, it was frankly ridiculous.
If I had been in his house, blocking his view of his television then I still would have expected a more jovial approach to getting me to move.
But the best came ten minutes later when I looked around to check I wasn’t blocking the precious princess’ view.
There he was again in my ear.
“Have you got a problem?”
“What are you looking at?”
“Who do you think you are looking at me?”
I returned to watching the game and ignored the tool.
But I would ask you, dear reader, to forward this story through your channels so that I may pass on the following message to the princess.
Your genitalia is small and malformed. You have an undeserved sense of entitlement. If everyone was like you the world would be a terrible place.
And in the 38 years I’ve spent in this world meeting wide variety of wierdoes, you’re the worst person I’ve ever met.