20 April 2011

I just lodged a formal complaint against my guvvy house neighbours...

| Captain RAAF
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My special neighbours have started to deconstruct several cars on the front lawn of their house, there are car parts and tools strewn all over the place, along with rubbish etc.

They’ve been doing this kind of thing for years, wrecking the colourbond fence, throwing rubbish into my yard, mobile phones onto my roof, using my driveway to get to and from their caryard parking facility and so on, not to mention their kids, all girls, getting around in just their undies, their cats and dogs wandering into my property to do what cats and dogs do, to cut a long story short, I’ve had enough!

So, I lodged a complaint and will soon receive a letter acknowledging same, with a reference number so I can refer to the departments gross lack of action in future.

I decided that a Blitzkreig approach is best, so I spoke to the elderly couple across the road and they too are submitting a formal complaint.

The question I pose to the RiotACT is, what do you think the Department of Housing will do about it?

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They will do nothing. I have been reporting a woman that has the lease on a guvvy flat and in 2 years has only lived there for 3 weeks. Housing have done nothing about it.

SidneyReilly2:08 pm 03 Jan 16

I have been in this situation myself. I bought a house next to a Guvvy place and did not realise it was a guvvy till the older guy who used to live there told me. Poor old guy passed away in trot some right bogans, 9 cars on the front lawn in various states of decomposition, the guy across the road complained to Housing who issued a clean up notice that was ignored. there was a contniual stream of ACTEW and police visiting. Problem was the bogans could not read….. Housing suggested that we move (I jest not) and I had a dummy spit and eventually things got sorted and those residends were moved on to be replaced by some great Kiwis….
Anyway just let me tell you that for those who say “sell up and move” you try selling a house next to a place with 9 cars on the front lawn and 4 males wandering around shouting obscenities at all and sundry….

TelecasterLPGTop said :

You haven’t mentioned whether you’ve sat down with them and had a chat about the situation, have you ? Going to the offending neighbour in a calm and friendly manner can have good results.

Oh, FFS. There’s always someone who comes out with this.

Cluetime: ferals, scum, anti-social substance-abusing lunatics and their ilk are not to be reasoned-with and to try will give them a definite target for attention in their substance-addled, bored, violent, welfare-funded lives.

TelecasterLPGTop9:41 am 21 Feb 12

You haven’t mentioned whether you’ve sat down with them and had a chat about the situation, have you ? Going to the offending neighbour in a calm and friendly manner can have good results. Of course if they’re crazy THEN you go for the throat.

The Antichrist8:44 pm 06 Sep 11

Captain RAAF said :

Easiest fix is to just burn the house down while no-ones home but no way I’m going to the slammer for these pigs, so it’s got to be done right, utilising the system

It is the easiest way, and it worked a treat in our street. Watch those electric blankets, they can cause all sorts of fire issues ya know !

Capt RAAF I’ve recently finished an 11 month stint at Housing ACT. Oh the stories I could tell.

Your neighbours will get their notice to vacate. If they’re smart they’ll lodge an appeal and get assistance from Northside or Southside Community Services or one or more of the many advocates they have access to. .

The chances of them actually getting turfed out is pretty slim from my experience. Once they get their visit from the RM they might behave for a few weeks then they’ll probably go back to their ways. I’ve seen it happen a hundred times. Oh and you’ll never get to know because the Privacy act stops anyone from Housing ACT telling you anything at all about their tenants.

The one thing you have to remember is; if they do get evicted, the new residents may be worse. Believe me there are families out there that you do NOT want to have as neighbours!!!

(but yes, it does put unnecessary stress on the rspca)

Captain RAAF said :

cat and now it may be but down..

The ceo of RSPCA was on RA about a year ago, he said that there are very few animals are put down, basically the ones that are injured so badly they won’t survive rehabilitation.

Captain RAAF5:10 pm 06 Sep 11

matt31221 said :

oh’, and I caught one of their cats and took it to the pound, I think I have two or three to go.

Very pleased that you got some action happenning to sort out your neighbours Capt. Just gotta say though – kidnapping someone elses pet cat and taking it to the pound is not cool, the owners may be douchbags but they were looking after and feeding that cat and now it may be but down. That is a pretty low act man.

I didn’t creep into their yard and trap it ya know, it came into my yard, i trapped it and took it to the RSPCA. If they really missed their cat(s) that would be the first place they’d look but all their mangy animals are unregistered, not micro-chipped therefore they are committing an offence so don’t bother retrieving them. That’s their problem, not mine!

Captain RAAF said :

Just a quick update and something to consider if you are in a similar situation as I.

The neighbors had five derelict cars and about five daily drivers. I can’t see anything being done about the five dailys, but I am pleased to report that two of the wrecks have been towed away and another two have been moved into their back yard.

The front yard is almost unrecognisable, you can actually see the grass now! There remains just one old wrecked people mover thing there. My fence has been straightened and once they pick up the 50kg of old clothes they dumped by the front door, things should be looking up…..

Complain often and loudly, get your good neighbors to complain also and you may just start getting results.

oh’, and I caught one of their cats and took it to the pound, I think I have two or three to go.

Very pleased that you got some action happenning to sort out your neighbours Capt. Just gotta say though – kidnapping someone elses pet cat and taking it to the pound is not cool, the owners may be douchbags but they were looking after and feeding that cat and now it may be but down. That is a pretty low act man.

Good news, pls keep the updates coming.

My public housing neighbour works as a foreman with a plumbing firm, owns a caravan down the coast and has just installed a pool. This no doubt fits the criteria!!!

Captain RAAF3:15 pm 06 Sep 11

**UPDATE**

Just received a call from the acting regional manager of the Dpt of Housing and they are going to issue the tenants with a notice to fix all the issues within 14 days (they were given 30 days to fix the problems and did nothing, which expired yesterday). Failure to address the problems and bring the property up to standard in that time frame will see them issued with a notice to vacate and legal action taken against them.

The acting regional manager will be personally visiting the property this week to bring these people up to speed. She’s been there before so knows what to expect. The Dept is not happy with the state of the property and they are acting so I don’t know why they are acting for me where others have failed? Maybe it’s my threats to write to the Minister as a disgruntled war veteran or the fact that I have photo’s of everything?

Anyway, noisy gear gets the grease!

Captain RAAF9:36 pm 04 Jun 11

Just a quick update and something to consider if you are in a similar situation as I.

The neighbors had five derelict cars and about five daily drivers. I can’t see anything being done about the five dailys, but I am pleased to report that two of the wrecks have been towed away and another two have been moved into their back yard.

The front yard is almost unrecognisable, you can actually see the grass now! There remains just one old wrecked people mover thing there. My fence has been straightened and once they pick up the 50kg of old clothes they dumped by the front door, things should be looking up…..

Complain often and loudly, get your good neighbors to complain also and you may just start getting results.

oh’, and I caught one of their cats and took it to the pound, I think I have two or three to go.

Captain RAAF, I hope you considered the disadvantaged homeless people before you posted (as was suggested to me : http://the-riotact.com/thanks-for-the-footpath-but/40776

I took matters into my own hands, for your information, and disposed of the rubbish in the park across the road. Maybe you should consider disposing of your rubbish in a similar way………… Oops, was that insensitive given the recent occurrences in Sydney where some poor innocent child was disposed of by her parents in bushland near their house).

big call, pb!!

Pommy bastard10:59 am 23 Apr 11

astrojax said :

like the song says, all ya do to me is talk talk…

Brilliant (eponymous) single by the best band of the 80’s.

Bemused said :

Well, this has been a good thread.

While I appreciate the frustration of having neighbours like this, so far the “solutions” have covered threats of murder, criminal damage (by fire and otherwise), paedophilic salivating over small children in underwear, suggestions that those same children should be plied with alcohol before being sexually assaulted and animal cruelty through the murder of household pets. I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

Gotta love a balanced and tolerant community.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR CLARITY
we all make our own kahma,
my wise aunty always use to say “two wrongs don’t make a right”
i can garenteee that retalliation IS NOT going to fix the problem, only make it worse.
there is a win/win situation

unfourtunatley nothing…(unless you know someone or can call on a favour!)
must be that time of year, my mum has been living in the same house for over 30ys and in the last 3 months her new neighbour has started verbally bullying her over a tree that is probabley older than he is, and making her general life so uncomfortable that she is actually concidering selling up!!!

Captain RAAF said :

Excellent, you all think I’ve gone soft. Mission successful!

This way, when plod comes to my door and asks me if I know anything about all the cars in the house next door catching on fire I can say ‘That’s so sad, what a tragedy for that poor struggling family’, and keep a straight face.

Firstly, I did go and speak to them and the result was ‘Whatever maaaaan!!’

So, dialogue has ended, you only get one chance with me.

Next step, complaints to the Department, lots of them, a lot of pictorial evidence building up before a report of biblical military proportions finds its way on Joy Burch’s desk with a ‘please explain’.

I then sit back and do nothing…for a long time, regardless of whether the filth cleans up their act or not, and when the end result is that they just trash the joint and start glaring at me evilly I start baiting them…enticing them, daring them, they’ll make a mistake, they’ll jump a fence in the middle of the night to kick my dunny down or poison my goldfish and I’ll be there, with a shotgun and the knife they tried to stab me with, or one by one all their cars die a few hundred metres down the road as the Obama style ‘cash for clunkers’ goop I put in their oil system blows their engines up.

I have by this stage, already ratsacked their prize bird collection and blown up the cat and two dogs.

Just getting warmed up at this point. They by now have probably put two and two together, come up with five and think it’s someone from interstate (hellooo, I’m just over here!). Quietly, I sit in my chair by the front door, happy in the knowledge that my spy camera is slowly collecting evidence of them poisoning the hedge that separates our property and them jumping the fence to do number two’s on my spa cover and so on, should their small brains start to look in my direction.

They leave all their sh/tbox cars open all night, doors open, windows open, so easy for them to mysteriously roll down the yard and take out the fence, other cars, corner of the house or for mysterious deposits of oil, litres and litres of it to appear on the ground under the car and then bursting into flame, of foreign bodies finding their way into carburetors, wonka-esque sugar deposits making their way into fuel tanks, the water being turned off and the pit housing the valve filling with quikset cement, all the car tyres being deflated and then topped up with just enough expanding foam that they think they can make it to the servo and then wonder why no air is getting in and so on.

I can keep it up forever. If they ever decide to play hard ball I am sure I have much better toys than they or their mates do.

like the song says, all ya do to me is talk talk… i thought you were captain raaf, superhero no 9. but you’re just a grumpy old man who likes to think tough and act meek. what a disappointment. where’s the hummer, the sweatband, the uzis blazing and the faithful sidekick saving you from time to time?

Pommy bastard8:20 am 23 Apr 11

Bemused said :

I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

It could be worse I suppose, they could be Welsh…

Postalgeek said :

Girls in Undies – eventually come of age. Fail to see the problem here, especially if you ply them with alcohol.

So, for what purpose were you planning to ply the girls with alcohol?

It is a little hard to see how my comment marks me as racist – presumably recognising that the kinds of people who suggest killing their neighbours and their pets, destroying their property and plying their children with alcohol (for whatever purpose) while expressing simplistic, stereotyped attitudes towards anyone dependent on welfare are reasonably likely to be intolerant in other ways (including racially) makes me racist. Probably better that I just stick to being violent, sexist and hating foreigners.

Oh, and no, I don’t agree with killing household pets, even in the very unlikely that it is done with the intention of eating the pet afterwards. Killing the pet quickly with a well-aimed bullet does not make it any less cruel.

Bemused said :

Well, this has been a good thread.

While I appreciate the frustration of having neighbours like this, so far the “solutions” have covered threats of murder, criminal damage (by fire and otherwise), paedophilic salivating over small children in underwear, suggestions that those same children should be plied with alcohol before being sexually assaulted and animal cruelty through the murder of household pets. I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

Gotta love a balanced and tolerant community.

What goose suggested a threat of murder? You either murder someone or you don’t. You don’t give them the heads up. I’m as outraged as you.

As for animal cruelty, I think you’re insinuating that the Captain couldn’t hit the inside of a barn. I’m sure the Captain could effect a humane headshot at 15 meters, and if he ate it, who could single him out in this meat-eating culture of ours? Unless of course you think its okay to kill some animals but not others, which would make you some sort of horrible specie-ist.

But I have to say that ignoring the ‘coming of age’ thing and suggesting underage girls should be plied with alcohol and sexually assaulted is a stroke of nefarious genius, far more pervy than what I came up with. If it weren’t for twisted kiddy fiddling interpretations like yours keeping the standard, I don’t know where this forum would be.

God bless all you concerned netizens, because when the captain mentioned foreigners, I was thinking about Poms and Americans and the French. But thankfully INFP stepped in and corrected the Captain, reminding him that only people of particular races are considered ‘foreign’.

p1 said :

Bemused said :

I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

I hate to mention that you are the only person to bring race into this. So while we might all be murdering, animal hating, arsonistic pedophiles, *YOU* are a racist.

actually no, Capt RAAF was the first to mention race (or foreigners to be exact).. i am tempted to presume he is joking here, but from the tone of the post, it seems he is serious?: Which is love the pathetic irony of, since most bogan roughies i see are white, born and bred (like weeds) Aussies. And yes I am an aussie born child of two foreigners, and fuck… my parents outwin most of the non-foreigners in almost every aspect of life. Shove that in your rifle, Captain.

Captain RAAF said :

Yes, yes I have, and there are so many similarities between that bloke and me it’s kinda scary.

We both own big old Fords from our youth, we both have been to war, we both have a bang stick, we are both old and cranky, we both don’t like the world and especially foreigners.

I fully anticipate one day, greeting one of the filth family on my property with the shooty end of a rifle.

Maybe they’ll make a sequel about me?…….

Bemused said :

I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

I hate to mention that you are the only person to bring race into this. So while we might all be murdering, animal hating, arsonistic pedophiles, *YOU* are a racist.

Captain I’m sure you’re aware of a fine CBC documentary; ‘Vietnam, the ten thousand day war’. Well, you’ve just finished day one of your own ten thousand day war.

You can compare yourself to the might of the US military and your neighbours are the wily VC and NVA; weak but backed by the endless logistical support of the communists.

cleo said :

Captain RAAF

The housing department will probably throw your letter in the bin, thinking to themselves NUT JOB!

+1

Captain RAAF

The housing department will probably throw your letter in the bin, thinking to themselves NUT JOB!

Your neighbour’s won’t be thrown out of their housing, as long as they pay their rent, and don’t light fires in the house, lol

Well, this has been a good thread.

While I appreciate the frustration of having neighbours like this, so far the “solutions” have covered threats of murder, criminal damage (by fire and otherwise), paedophilic salivating over small children in underwear, suggestions that those same children should be plied with alcohol before being sexually assaulted and animal cruelty through the murder of household pets. I can only assume these neighbours are of Anglo background, otherwise the racial insults would have been coming thick and fast by now.

Gotta love a balanced and tolerant community.

I sympathise with the Captain, and regularly thank the deity of your choice (since I don’t have one) for my good neighbours. There have been one or two correctional episodes about barking dogs and feral children, but as a long serving bureaucrat and a person who can be scary when required, they have been dealt with satisfactorily.

Robert Frost was right when he said that good fences make good neighbours. My first advice to the Captain and the person in another thread whose neighbour has built onto their land is – erect barriers, even at your own expense. After a few years of having adjacent dogs hopping the fence into my yard, I just coughed up for a high fence. Worth every penny.

In a way, the Captain is better off than some. Obnoxious neighbours who own their property are plentiful, and even harder to get rid of.

Captain RAAF said :

Erg0 said :

Ever seen Gran Torino?

Yes, yes I have, and there are so many similarities between that bloke and me it’s kinda scary.

We both own big old Fords from our youth, we both have been to war, we both have a bang stick, we are both old and cranky, we both don’t like the world and especially foreigners.

I fully anticipate one day, greeting one of the filth family on my property with the shooty end of a rifle.

Maybe they’ll make a sequel about me?…….

Go for it Captain – full steam ahead!! Good luck with the letter – and with the urban terrorism! Let us know the result.

Captain RAAF1:18 pm 21 Apr 11

Erg0 said :

Ever seen Gran Torino?

Yes, yes I have, and there are so many similarities between that bloke and me it’s kinda scary.

We both own big old Fords from our youth, we both have been to war, we both have a bang stick, we are both old and cranky, we both don’t like the world and especially foreigners.

I fully anticipate one day, greeting one of the filth family on my property with the shooty end of a rifle.

Maybe they’ll make a sequel about me?…….

Pommy bastard1:14 pm 21 Apr 11

colourful sydney racing identity said :

That is quite a rant, even by your standards, so much anger.

What are you up to over Easter? A bit of Michael Douglasesque Falling Down?

I was hoping some one would bite, and your so kind to oblige..

Sometime it’s like shooting fish in a barrel around here.

🙂

colourful sydney racing identity12:14 pm 21 Apr 11

Pommy bastard said :

Well now you’ve torn it captain! You’ve done the worse possible thing.

As soon as these letters hit the desks, action will be taken, and hordes of Govvy workers will descend on your neighbours. Armed with policies, human rights legislation and backed by the taxpayer, they will go straight to the house next door, round up the neighbours, assess the state of the property, look at the kids and their health and school attendance, and bring down the full force of the ACT civil service to bear on them.

“Can we get you more benefits? Would you like a bigger and better house? Would you like more social support? How about a couple, no three or four dedicated social workers at your beck and call to help you out daily? Would you like some home help with cleaning and cooking? Any fines you need to get paid off? Do you have relatives incarcerated, maybe we can help get them off. Anyone vaguely ethnic or aboriginal in this household? If so we can get you lots and lots and lots more help!!”

Oh, and next they’ll be onto you captain, with cease and desist warrants for harassing the poor blighters.

Didn’t you know that law abiding white working males are ALWAYS in the wrong?

That is quite a rant, even by your standards, so much anger.

What are you up to over Easter? A bit of Michael Douglasesque Falling Down?

Captain RAAF said :

wonka-esque sugar deposits making their way into fuel tanks,

Sugar in the fuel tank doesn’t work. However. Bleach in the oil works wonders.

If you ferret around on the ‘net, you’ll find many folk outlining effective ways of discouraging undesirable neighbours. Some of them are very do-able, and apply quite well to your situation. Have you thought of the possibilities offered by stink-pipes, for instance?

Pommy bastard said :

Well now you’ve torn it captain! You’ve done the worse possible thing.

As soon as these letters hit the desks, action will be taken, and hordes of Govvy workers will descend on your neighbours. Armed with policies, human rights legislation and backed by the taxpayer, they will go straight to the house next door, round up the neighbours, assess the state of the property, look at the kids and their health and school attendance, and bring down the full force of the ACT civil service to bear on them.

“Can we get you more benefits? Would you like a bigger and better house? Would you like more social support? How about a couple, no three or four dedicated social workers at your beck and call to help you out daily? Would you like some home help with cleaning and cooking? Any fines you need to get paid off? Do you have relatives incarcerated, maybe we can help get them off. Anyone vaguely ethnic or aboriginal in this household? If so we can get you lots and lots and lots more help!!”

Oh, and next they’ll be onto you captain, with cease and desist warrants for harassing the poor blighters.

Didn’t you know that law abiding white working males are ALWAYS in the wrong?

+1
Haha, gold.

Ever seen Gran Torino?

Captain RAAF8:59 am 21 Apr 11

Postalgeek said :

Disappointed, Captain.

Throwing rubbish into your yard/roof – collect rubbish and ram down toilet inspection hole located outside toilet window when they are not at home. Rescrew lid. Epoxy for added entertainment.

Driveway – folding bollard/caltrops/star pickets in the shrubs

Cat/Dogs – .22 softdrink bottle special edition or broadheads

Girls in Undies – eventually come of age. Fail to see the problem here, especially if you ply them with alcohol.

Cars – Arrange for scrap merchants to visit when the family goes away. Stand on their front lawn like you own it and offer to assist them.

All good ideas but as tempting as it is to stuff them around, the objective is to have them move out, either by choice or by order of the department. I need the department to come to the conclusion that they must go, either due to a consistant abuse of the tenancy policy or by the cost of maintaining the house to the point they want to sell it off.

Easiest fix is to just burn the house down while no-ones home but no way I’m going to the slammer for these pigs, so it’s got to be done right, utilising the system.

Why not just report it as a meth lab?

Captain RAAF said :

Excellent, you all think I’ve gone soft. Mission successful!

This way, when plod comes to my door and asks me if I know anything about all the cars in the house next door catching on fire I can say ‘That’s so sad, what a tragedy for that poor struggling family’, and keep a straight face.

Firstly, I did go and speak to them and the result was ‘Whatever maaaaan!!’

So, dialogue has ended, you only get one chance with me.

Next step, complaints to the Department, lots of them, a lot of pictorial evidence building up before a report of biblical military proportions finds its way on Joy Burch’s desk with a ‘please explain’.

I then sit back and do nothing…for a long time, regardless of whether the filth cleans up their act or not, and when the end result is that they just trash the joint and start glaring at me evilly I start baiting them…enticing them, daring them, they’ll make a mistake, they’ll jump a fence in the middle of the night to kick my dunny down or poison my goldfish and I’ll be there, with a shotgun and the knife they tried to stab me with, or one by one all their cars die a few hundred metres down the road as the Obama style ‘cash for clunkers’ goop I put in their oil system blows their engines up.

I have by this stage, already ratsacked their prize bird collection and blown up the cat and two dogs.

Just getting warmed up at this point. They by now have probably put two and two together, come up with five and think it’s someone from interstate (hellooo, I’m just over here!). Quietly, I sit in my chair by the front door, happy in the knowledge that my spy camera is slowly collecting evidence of them poisoning the hedge that separates our property and them jumping the fence to do number two’s on my spa cover and so on, should their small brains start to look in my direction.

They leave all their sh/tbox cars open all night, doors open, windows open, so easy for them to mysteriously roll down the yard and take out the fence, other cars, corner of the house or for mysterious deposits of oil, litres and litres of it to appear on the ground under the car and then bursting into flame, of foreign bodies finding their way into carburetors, wonka-esque sugar deposits making their way into fuel tanks, the water being turned off and the pit housing the valve filling with quikset cement, all the car tyres being deflated and then topped up with just enough expanding foam that they think they can make it to the servo and then wonder why no air is getting in and so on.

I can keep it up forever. If they ever decide to play hard ball I am sure I have much better toys than they or their mates do.

Todd Carney does need any ideas.

Pommy bastard8:09 am 21 Apr 11

Well now you’ve torn it captain! You’ve done the worse possible thing.

As soon as these letters hit the desks, action will be taken, and hordes of Govvy workers will descend on your neighbours. Armed with policies, human rights legislation and backed by the taxpayer, they will go straight to the house next door, round up the neighbours, assess the state of the property, look at the kids and their health and school attendance, and bring down the full force of the ACT civil service to bear on them.

“Can we get you more benefits? Would you like a bigger and better house? Would you like more social support? How about a couple, no three or four dedicated social workers at your beck and call to help you out daily? Would you like some home help with cleaning and cooking? Any fines you need to get paid off? Do you have relatives incarcerated, maybe we can help get them off. Anyone vaguely ethnic or aboriginal in this household? If so we can get you lots and lots and lots more help!!”

Oh, and next they’ll be onto you captain, with cease and desist warrants for harassing the poor blighters.

Didn’t you know that law abiding white working males are ALWAYS in the wrong?

I used to live next door to a person like you,but after I wrote a letter…

georgesgenitals8:00 am 21 Apr 11

Postalgeek said :

Disappointed, Captain.

Throwing rubbish into your yard/roof – collect rubbish and ram down toilet inspection hole located outside toilet window when they are not at home. Rescrew lid. Epoxy for added entertainment.

Driveway – folding bollard/caltrops/star pickets in the shrubs

Cat/Dogs – .22 softdrink bottle special edition or broadheads

Girls in Undies – eventually come of age. Fail to see the problem here, especially if you ply them with alcohol.

Cars – Arrange for scrap merchants to visit when the family goes away. Stand on their front lawn like you own it and offer to assist them.

I like the last suggestion a lot. Ring the scrap guys and say “hey, got a buch of old cars and wife says they have to go or she’s leaving. If you pick them up you can have ’em”.

Tee hee…

screaming banshee7:42 am 21 Apr 11

Seems capt raaf accidentally used his ‘tough guy’ login for the softly softly stuff. So what’s your cardigan wearing, tea drinking, letter writing login normally captain?

wildturkeycanoe6:12 am 21 Apr 11

Doesn’t that show on TV [ACA or something] sort these kind of things out for you on the public arena? Make some calls and see if you can get some fast moving reactions from bad publicity.

Disappointed, Captain.

Throwing rubbish into your yard/roof – collect rubbish and ram down toilet inspection hole located outside toilet window when they are not at home. Rescrew lid. Epoxy for added entertainment.

Driveway – folding bollard/caltrops/star pickets in the shrubs

Cat/Dogs – .22 softdrink bottle special edition or broadheads

Girls in Undies – eventually come of age. Fail to see the problem here, especially if you ply them with alcohol.

Cars – Arrange for scrap merchants to visit when the family goes away. Stand on their front lawn like you own it and offer to assist them.

Captain RAAF, I am assuming they are not ‘owners’ of the property? The owners of the property would need to abide by their lease conditions and therefore I believe ACTPLA can enforce the cleaning of ‘dirty blocks’. However I am not sure of the situation when the property is rented (in which case it would be the Department of Housing that would be the lessee?)
Maybe give ACTPLA a call to see if they have any recommendations?

Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer.

Captain RAAF9:05 pm 20 Apr 11

Excellent, you all think I’ve gone soft. Mission successful!

This way, when plod comes to my door and asks me if I know anything about all the cars in the house next door catching on fire I can say ‘That’s so sad, what a tragedy for that poor struggling family’, and keep a straight face.

Firstly, I did go and speak to them and the result was ‘Whatever maaaaan!!’

So, dialogue has ended, you only get one chance with me.

Next step, complaints to the Department, lots of them, a lot of pictorial evidence building up before a report of biblical military proportions finds its way on Joy Burch’s desk with a ‘please explain’.

I then sit back and do nothing…for a long time, regardless of whether the filth cleans up their act or not, and when the end result is that they just trash the joint and start glaring at me evilly I start baiting them…enticing them, daring them, they’ll make a mistake, they’ll jump a fence in the middle of the night to kick my dunny down or poison my goldfish and I’ll be there, with a shotgun and the knife they tried to stab me with, or one by one all their cars die a few hundred metres down the road as the Obama style ‘cash for clunkers’ goop I put in their oil system blows their engines up.

I have by this stage, already ratsacked their prize bird collection and blown up the cat and two dogs.

Just getting warmed up at this point. They by now have probably put two and two together, come up with five and think it’s someone from interstate (hellooo, I’m just over here!). Quietly, I sit in my chair by the front door, happy in the knowledge that my spy camera is slowly collecting evidence of them poisoning the hedge that separates our property and them jumping the fence to do number two’s on my spa cover and so on, should their small brains start to look in my direction.

They leave all their sh/tbox cars open all night, doors open, windows open, so easy for them to mysteriously roll down the yard and take out the fence, other cars, corner of the house or for mysterious deposits of oil, litres and litres of it to appear on the ground under the car and then bursting into flame, of foreign bodies finding their way into carburetors, wonka-esque sugar deposits making their way into fuel tanks, the water being turned off and the pit housing the valve filling with quikset cement, all the car tyres being deflated and then topped up with just enough expanding foam that they think they can make it to the servo and then wonder why no air is getting in and so on.

I can keep it up forever. If they ever decide to play hard ball I am sure I have much better toys than they or their mates do.

you could try building a deck over the front of their property.

georgesgenitals8:21 pm 20 Apr 11

tonkatuff82 said :

georgesgenitals said :

tonkatuff82 said :

georgesgenitals said :

If you can find them, maybe you can hire…

THE A TEAM!

Actually probably want to go with the B Team on this one, it’d be long and protracted

He already referred it to the B team…

Kudos Genital Man, glad I could set that up for you

Couldn’t have done it without you, wingman…

screaming banshee8:14 pm 20 Apr 11

The capt raaf I’ve read about would have just revved one of his many v8’s until his neighbours were scared away.

Honestly the best thing to do is try to move somewhere else. I suffered the same fate and following complaints to ACT housing I was told they couldnt tell me the outcome of the investigation for “confidentiality reasons”- meanwhile it was just business as usual for the tards next door.

You aren’t softening up in your old age, are you Captain?

Is this really the mighty Captain RAAF? Or has someone stolen your log-on?

Working for a certain authority I often work in suburbs and go to almost 50% of all the houses in a suburb over a couple of months. About 5 particular houses around that I know of in various suburbs are THAT bad and have colourbond fences. I can imagine how you feel living NEXT to these grubs, I absolutely LOATH going on to those type of properties, they give me the shits but I still have to smile and do my job.

You being Capt RAAF though, I can imagine you just drawing the line one day and having a snap – going round to your neighbours with your guns blazing. Maybe it is the only way you’ll get results short of moving house.

How old are said “Girls in Undies”? 😉

I’m kind of disappointed. I thought the Captain would have gone next door and shown these punks what for, but no. He’s a letter writing softy…

georgesgenitals said :

tonkatuff82 said :

georgesgenitals said :

If you can find them, maybe you can hire…

THE A TEAM!

Actually probably want to go with the B Team on this one, it’d be long and protracted

He already referred it to the B team…

Kudos Genital Man, glad I could set that up for you

georgesgenitals6:33 pm 20 Apr 11

tonkatuff82 said :

georgesgenitals said :

If you can find them, maybe you can hire…

THE A TEAM!

Actually probably want to go with the B Team on this one, it’d be long and protracted

He already referred it to the B team…

georgesgenitals said :

If you can find them, maybe you can hire…

THE A TEAM!

Actually probably want to go with the B Team on this one, it’d be long and protracted

georgesgenitals6:11 pm 20 Apr 11

If you can find them, maybe you can hire…

THE A TEAM!

“The question I pose to the RiotACT is, what do you think the Department of Housing will do about it?”

I’ll give you the hot tip: absolutely nothing.

You don’t actually expect them to do anything do you?
You’re the letter-writing type of citizen. Your neighbors are probably the brick-throwing, stabby-stabby type of citizen. I’m sorry, but if I worked for the Department of Housing I wouldn’t do anything about your complaint either. What are you going to do, write another letter? What would your neighbors do, shank me? I bet they wouldn’t even scrawl my name on the toilet of the interchange…

luther_bendross4:37 pm 20 Apr 11

I hope they do more for you than they did for me. I submitted 8 formal complaints over 2.5 years, and I knw of another 12 submitted by other residents. ACT housing, for some reason could only act on each case individually and were unable (bureaucratically or through sheer incompetence) to join the dots. Good luck.

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