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Canberra Video Production and Green Screen Studio

Just don’t tell anyone that you’re applying.

By Eyes - 26 February 2008 25

As Canberra Public Servants flinch at imminent cuts, the unspeakable has come to the rescue. A new kind of government job in a form offered in new multi-hooked online ads in the Canberra Times. Have you got what it takes?

Without looking down, what’s the colour of your office carpet? Get it right? Then you’ve got what it takes.

Notice anything unusual today? Then you’ve got what it takes.

You’re cruising round State Circle, tuned into 104.7FM, fingers tapping the steering wheel. You see the flag on Parliament House flapping in the breeze. You indicate to move to the left lane, but a car swerves in front of you. You hit the breaks, look to your right and quickly move into another lane. You miss your exit. Slight problem. You’re already late for your big meeeting. Then you remember you can take the next exit and double back to Kings Avenue. Problem Solved. …… Adaptable. Decicive. Aware. Nothing unususal you figure, until you discover these are the qualities you’ll be valued for as a Surveillance Officer.

Guess who’s recruiting when we’re all cutting? Oh, and dont tell anyone you’re applying.

What’s Your opinion?

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25 Responses to
Just don’t tell anyone that you’re applying.
James-T-Kirk 12:48 pm 26 Feb 08

You are currently being trained as we speak.

Your assignment will be delivered to you in your next coffee.

Skidbladnir 12:04 pm 26 Feb 08

I can tell the difference between sugar and table salt, as well as the difference between margarine and butter.
Do I qualify for ASIO training?

Devil_n_Disquiz 11:56 am 26 Feb 08

can you tell the difference between BREAKS and BRAKES…Then you’ve got what it takes.


ant 11:41 am 26 Feb 08

I’ve been enjoying the spoofs broadcast by the FM 104.7 morning announcers. At first you think they’re the actual ads, and then they go all silly and want you to apply on and suchlike.

Aurelius 11:19 am 26 Feb 08

So ability to navigate when you’re in the wrong lane makes you able to be a spy?
Wouldn’t that mean ASIO would be filled with taxi drivers?

Mælinar 11:09 am 26 Feb 08

Since they’re so smart, they can call me, once they have filled out my resume, completed my claims against the selection critieria, interviewed me, and found me suitable.

I expect nothing less, on account of they are that good…

James-T-Kirk 10:48 am 26 Feb 08

If you are in the car, you probably aren’t a spy – Remember, as Paul Simon said – “The man in the gaberdine suit is a spy – be careful, his bowtie is really a camera”

There – Everybody on buses are spies – it is one massive spy fest.

Da Da Da — SPYFEST 2008 – coming to a Bus Stop near you!

Dave_K 10:45 am 26 Feb 08

They have used the same approach for ads in Sydney, ‘cept the reference is to Nova and other Sydney landmarks. Some ponytail probably got paid a lot of money for this tripe. (I mean, 104.7?) That said, let’s see whether RiotACTers are cut out for a career in the spooky crafts. If you took this manuever where do you think you would end up? I’m figuring you’re now making the missed turn left somewhere around Sydney or Brisbane Ave, going back along National Circuit to Kings Avenue.

James-T-Kirk 10:39 am 26 Feb 08

Could be that they want to identify all of the public servants who are actually serious security risks, by being the types who listen to 104.7, and keeping their noses in others business, clearly ignoring the basic security requirement of:

Keep your head down, bum up, doing your job, being focused on your work – not everybody elses….

Remember – “Need to know”, and you probably don’t have a need to know why I am here – move on.

Joe Canberran 10:10 am 26 Feb 08

It’s for real. The inane comments (the 104.7, kings ave stuff) in Eyes post are the actual lines used in ASIO’s webpage.

Seems ASIO has a very low marketing budget.

James-T-Kirk 10:00 am 26 Feb 08

Shhh – we aren’t supposed to be talking about this.

West_Kambah_4eva 9:58 am 26 Feb 08

Is this for real or is this guy just an idiot?

shiny flu 9:55 am 26 Feb 08

I don’t like 104.7 …can I still apply?

Aurelius 9:29 am 26 Feb 08

Is this the kind of article where, because of its nature, correcting the poster’s spelling and/or punctuation is acceptable? Is that observant, or anally-retentive?

p1 9:22 am 26 Feb 08

So I guess i souldn’t have put that I was applying on my facebook page then?

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