12 June 2008

Sex in the City

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This is a weird request and I can see the stupid immature responses coming already, but can anyone tell me if there are any ladies in Canberra that offer Sex Coaching services? I don’t mean a counselling service but someone who offers 1 on 1 in bed room coaching.

And I don’t mean a working lady as there are plenty of them.

I have seen people offering these kind of services in Syd & Melb but am not sure if there is anyone in Canberra who provides the same?

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Wheelee said :

Can anyone recommend a wheelchair friendly (physical accessible and understanding girls) brothel in Canberra?

Having no experience of such, I am coil about visiting and wish not to embarrass anyone. But my physical disabilities mean that I can’t even satisfy my own daily/weekly needs. And, it is not something that I can simply ask everyone to help me with.

Wheelie – I’m ignorant of such matters (no, really) but I used to work with a guy some years ago who was in similar circumstances as you. This guy was a koomarri placement in my workplace and had issues with discretion etc. so from his experiences I can tell you that your best bet may be to find a brothel that will send someone to your house, assuming that is possible for you.

Can anyone recommend a wheelchair friendly (physical accessible and understanding girls) brothel in Canberra?

Having no experience of such, I am coil about visiting and wish not to embarrass anyone. But my physical disabilities mean that I can’t even satisfy my own daily/weekly needs. And, it is not something that I can simply ask everyone to help me with.

canberracafe.com11:16 pm 12 Jun 08

I think your best bet is to expand your search to Sydney and spend a weekend up there? Seriously, it never ceases to amaze me that you can see death and destruction daily on prime time news, yet a breast or someone asking for help with their sexuality is for some bizarre reason taboo. A breast never killed anyone.

I applaud your honesty and believe the world would be a better place if we could all feel more comfortable with ourselves.

And men often have bugger all support networks beyond the jovial mates-in-the-pub which, honestly, achieves little for anything of any depth.

I think the suggestion of, seriously, researching some fine ‘establishments’ is the way to go. Half the time these people are probably just that, one on one therapists. You just need to do some digging around to find the ‘niche’ market or specialisation you require.

It’s sad that it’s easier to obtain a weapon than it is get help like this.

I wish you all the best.

CanberraResident10:30 pm 12 Jun 08

@Bob B – Caaarn, spit it out. You’re Bob the Builder aren’t you? Or perhaps, SpongeBob Squarepants … That’s it. I’m calling the OFLC.

green_frogs_go_pop10:14 pm 12 Jun 08

Ari said :

The tagline I’m seeing on this page at the moment is quite appropriate: “For a good time email root@the-riotact.com

BAHAHA! me two!

Err. Try the brothels.

Or swinger hill. I hear they’re pratically the same 😀

Long time reader first time posting, very cliche, but this one really sparked my interest.

Personally I think your first port of call(s) would be the brothel’s in Fyshwick. Speak with the Madames, could be their official title or I could have made it up, and talk very specifically about what you would like help with and like to do. They can then recommend one of the girls or suggest a time to come back when their best pick is working. You might be surprised at their responses, they deal with all sorts of issues all the time, from disabilities to inexperience to fetishes to whatever. Then I’d make sure they speak with the girl and have them introduce you. You can then ask the girl anything you want to know and map out exactly what you’d like to do or “work” on. From your post a “1 on 1 sex coach” is a “working girl” regardless, just a thought.

It is in their interest to treat you well and provide whatever service you’d like. Brothels rely on repeat customers as much as any business does. For $200 an hour (negotiate a price if you think you’ll need longer, and always check your watch on the way in and out…some brothels have a habit of “interrupting” with time still left…enough said) it might be your simplest and most convenient option. Whatever it is you’d like to do I’m sure they have heard it or better yet done it before for someone.

If that doesn’t work for you then find a bored housewife and let her teach you what she’d like… sugar mummy (hahaha I jest…maybe)

Good luck

I think BoB’s problem is perhaps a little more complicated than that Serpico.

But BoB, I don’t think anyone here really knows anything to answer your unusual request – is the problem such that you really need a coach, and there’s no way to learn from videos or self-help books? Or alternatively, do you really need an expert on sexual techniques, or will an expert on problems of the mind (e.g. psychotherapist) be able to help you just as well?

Correct me if I’m wrong but it seems to me that problems are either going to be physical in origin (in which case experience with a sympathetic partner may be the most helpful), or psychological (where talking to a therapist with no specific knowledge or training in sexual techniques themselves should be just as helpful as a surrogate, if not moreso).

I can’t really envisage a scenario where a “sex coach” would be a better option than a sympathetic girlfriend or a professional trained in helping you get over psychological issues. This is especially true if, as you say, you have no trouble talking to women. If your problem is related to a traumatic experience in the past then a psychiatrist might be the person to talk to.

Just my opinion… I sort of think that sex coaches are the narrow niche they are because most people can make their way through a problem using the help of friends, lovers or health professionals. If you can indicate a situation where a sex coach is in fact a better choice than any of these, I’d be interested to hear about it, and if this is the case other people may be able to help you out a bit better.

You must be a virgin.I suggest you go to a brothol.They will show you how to do it.Might be even cheaper than a sex coach.

The tagline I’m seeing on this page at the moment is quite appropriate: “For a good time email root@the-riotact.com

Ingeegoodbee2:29 pm 12 Jun 08

Have you tried Canberra Connect?

“1 on 1 in bed room coaching” – sounds just like a working girl to me.

On http://www.assertnsw.org.au, the woman mentioned above has an email address on the Contact page.

I reckon she’d be a goer, or at least refer you to someone who is up for it.

Until that last sentence I was going to suggest the uni bar – much easier, cheaper, and natural(?) than therapy. Although your mileage may vary…

‘Sex therapy’ covers a great many grounds, and generally doesn’t involve physical contact or fluid exchange.

Sexual surrogacy is far more specific and overcomes specific issues people may need to work through, like performance anxiety, or as in the article cited above, the one-armed guy trying to overcome the fact he prefers to be on top, has to support himself, but doesn’t want to be guided in.

It gets criticised for crossing the personal dependence and emotional involvement bits of Psychology Ethics 101, as without forming an emotional attachment it doesn’t wrk as true surrogacy.

Not being a psychology major or having any further background in it than “I once knew a girl”, I suggest someone go find an expert.
(Maybe we can attract one through manetic lure of Google to RiotACT, when the daily pagerankings update recognises us)

To answer some questions I am a 26yr old single male & pt time student. I do not feel the need to discuss specifics in this forum, I am just looking for some answers that I can’t seem to find.

The type of service, or therapy if you will, needed is the type described in the article provided by Skidbladnir. The correct term does seem to be Surrogate Therapy and a few searches has yielded some results but still nothing in the Canberra region.

And no I do not have trouble meeting or talking to women so any suggestions of just getting out there and having a go is not helpful.

wouldn’t there be some soft porn type videos that would do this? There would be some woman-centric productions out there surely… A step up from Mills and Boon- a step down from Jemma Jamieson and two girls and one cup.

Hm, and another thing. I wouldn’t think a “sexual surrogate” would be needed if you’re just young and inexperienced, or if you’re worrying about not pleasing a certain lady-friend… I’d think if you were in that situation, which you may or may not be, time would solve all.

I would have thought (from no knowledge of the profession whatsoever!) these people would be there to iron out existing problems with couples like communication and give-and-take, or solutions for physical things like premature ejaculation rather than show you how to do “the old in-out-in-out”. 😀 The mechanics would be the job of a working lady, I’d be guessing.

You’re a brave (wo)man for posting this on The RiotACT, congrats! I must admit a few years ago, right before getting together with my now-fiance, I was mildly curious as to whether there was such a profession out there. Never would have had the guts or real desire to go to one though!

I-filed and Skidbladnir sound like they’ve got the right ideas.

I saw a documentary about an American sex therapist years ago on – must have been SBS I guess. She took a married couple through various techniques. She was a very warm person. It definitely wasn’t a threesome and wasn’t prostitution, yet wasn’t clinical. It was an interesting doco. Bob B perhaps you should contact the employee organisation WISE – Workers in Sex Employment, as sex counsellors probably sign up there. The Citizen Advocacy Bureau probably have their contact. Fiona Patten from the Eros Foundation would know.

i like it…….

Sexual surrogate is the correct term for the profession and not that unusual or uncommon these days but I’m reminded of …

remove the comma after psychologists.

In the interests of stemming the flow of silly answers accusing everyone in Fyshwick of being sex therapists, or calling the psychologists, sluts, whores and gigolos:

“Sex and the surrogate”, The Age, 05June08:
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2003/06/04/1054700271752.html

ASSERT (the Australian Society of Sex Educators, Researchers, and Therapists)
http://www.assertnsw.org.au
ACT Contact:
Ms Jane Keany

There are also a great many swingers clubs in Canberra.
(And they’re not in it for the therapy)

I believe Canberra has a suburb called Swinger Hill. Might be worth a visit.

neanderthalsis10:58 am 12 Jun 08

A friend visited a tantric goddess a while back to teach him the intricacies of sex etc. It all seemed a little strange and hippy like when described in a blow by blow account over a few wee drams afterwards but he swears that it “awakened” him to the power of sex.

It was a weekend of 1 on 1 instruction up behind the Gold Coast in QLD.

Maybe you could just buy a Karma Sutra guide and get adventurous, sex is about exploration, not instruction.

There’s a mob I’ve seen advertised at my doctor’s called ‘Relationships Australia’ (http://www.relationships.com.au/). If you don’t find a more specific provider, they may be able to point you in the right direction.

I’m guessing this post was triggered by “The G Spot vs the greasy van out back of the Belconnen Labour Club”.

They are totally different posts though – one about good burgers, the other about good buggery.

I’m am impressed that one of the potentially most random and off-topic threads of the month have some of the best, on-topic answers.

I too am interested in the Sex/Age/Relationship status of the original poster, as I think that it frames the question somewhat.

I went to Uni with a girl who was originally paying her way through a BPsych by working as a stripper, and then branched out into sex therapy.

She would talk to people (normally seperately, but couples together was also on the table) about their concerns with themselves or eachother, gave them examples of what not to do and what to do to improve things.
She generally tried to work through situations without needing to meet the other person, and let the couples enjoy eachother.

Her advice generally boiled down to it being more to do with dealing with feelings, emotions, and sensation (as in sensuality) than the actual mechanics.
But in the cases where there was a mechanical problem, she would try to help without needing to see it, and just made recommendations for some sort of return-energy spring chair, harness, or kind of toy.

If these worked, she was happy, but if the couple didn’t seem to improve things, were really up to it, could watch (normally by being sent video, rarely by being invited to watch directly) and offer -after the fact- suggestions.
As fun as she was, she was in a happy stable relationship, so would -never- join in.

(so also about as far from the Monty Python sex-ed class as you can get)

But, she works out of Newtown now.

makes me think of the sex ed skit from the meaning of life – monty python at its best….

Happy to offer my services at a reduced rate for RA readers and contributers 😛

I have heard that sex coaches give you blow by blow instructions.

Interesting.

I’m intrigued too… What exactly does this profession involve? … forgive my naivety, but…. does she just give you tips? or watch you? or what?

That’s the most interesting post on here for a while… lol

You need coaching? Isn’t one of the wonders of sex slowly unraveling its secrets with your chosen partner/s? Good luck with your quest.

I’m curious, how old are you?

Are you male or female?

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