4 May 2012

The Economic Development Directorate lectures on racism, cheering, and sport

| johnboy
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There’s little in this world as nauseating as the growing legions of Government social media experts re-tweeting everything a minister says (often followed by a leaden “thank you for the re-tweet” from the Minister).

But this morning’s effort from the Economic Development Directorate really takes the cake.

Remember taxpayers. You’re paying to be lectured on who you cheer for and how you cheer. With a bonus implication you’re racist and sexist and please try and hide it while you’re at the ground.

https://twitter.com/ACTEDD/status/198208585799450625

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gazket said :

If I cheer for Australia at the olympics am I racist ?

Yes.

You monster.

If I cheer for Australia at the olympics am I racist ?

poetix said :

Dear Economic Development Directorate,

I am troubled by some of the Brumbies’ song:

‘PROUD TO BE A BRUMBY’
(To the tune of ‘Click go the Shears’)

‘From the Heart of Mountain country, where the Brumby reigns supreme,
From the country’s capital there comes a rugby team,
We keep the spirit going, as we stick it to the foe,
And crush the opposition with the final telling blow.

Chorus

Stick to your guns boys, play with pride,
Hit it up the middle then spin the ball out wide,
Standing at the coalface, taking on the best,
Proud to be Australian with a Brumby on our chest.
…’

I feel that this is somewhat aggressive in tone, wouldn’t you agree? May I suggest:

‘From the womb of Mountain Country, where the Brumbies are sometimes adequate,
From the compromise between Sydney and Melbourne comes a rugby team and associated support staff,
We are aware of our strengths, while acknowledging work-shopped weaknesses, and attempt to achieve our goals,
And make it clear that we are a genuine force to be reckoned with, and look forward to meaningful discussions with the Waratahs [opposing team to be updated week to week].

Chorus

Put down those weapons, boys (and let us not rule out girls), play with satisfaction,
Attempt to assert oneself within the rules of the game,
While engaged in any useful industry, engage with all who would give consent to engagement,
And acknowledge the unique biodiversity of this section of Gondwanaland through sartorial representation.’

‘Cheer hard’, from your tweet, is perhaps a little overly masculine too. May I suggest ‘support in any way you might feel support may be appropriately expressed?’

Thank you for your time.

Salutations

Some comparatively (and certainly only physically) weak woman who thinks you should stick to economic development.

Fail: you forgot to mention the traditional owners of the land… 🙂

poetix said :

Dear Economic Development Directorate,

I am troubled by some of the Brumbies’ song:

‘PROUD TO BE A BRUMBY’
(To the tune of ‘Click go the Shears’)

‘From the Heart of Mountain country, where the Brumby reigns supreme,
From the country’s capital there comes a rugby team,
We keep the spirit going, as we stick it to the foe,
And crush the opposition with the final telling blow.

Chorus

Stick to your guns boys, play with pride,
Hit it up the middle then spin the ball out wide,
Standing at the coalface, taking on the best,
Proud to be Australian with a Brumby on our chest.
…’

I feel that this is somewhat aggressive in tone, wouldn’t you agree? May I suggest:

‘From the womb of Mountain Country, where the Brumbies are sometimes adequate,
From the compromise between Sydney and Melbourne comes a rugby team and associated support staff,
We are aware of our strengths, while acknowledging work-shopped weaknesses, and attempt to achieve our goals,
And make it clear that we are a genuine force to be reckoned with, and look forward to meaningful discussions with the Waratahs [opposing team to be updated week to week].

Chorus

Put down those weapons, boys (and let us not rule out girls), play with satisfaction,
Attempt to assert oneself within the rules of the game,
While engaged in any useful industry, engage with all who would give consent to engagement,
And acknowledge the unique biodiversity of this section of Gondwanaland through sartorial representation.’

‘Cheer hard’, from your tweet, is perhaps a little overly masculine too. May I suggest ‘support in any way you might feel support may be appropriately expressed?’

Thank you for your time.

Salutations

Some comparatively (and certainly only physically) weak woman who thinks you should stick to economic development.

Poetix, I think I want to marry you. Your work is on a par with the Great Bard (Willian McGonngall I mean) himself. 🙂

Cheer hard for the @BrumbiesRugby

Which masculinist male oppressor with a penis fixation wrote that?

Cheer vaginally for the Brumbies!

So, as long as it’s not racist or sexist, it’s all good? Sweet. Here comes a night of discussing the Waratahs in the following terms:
– Their lack of intelligence (Waratards being a crowd favourite)
– Their lack of ability to sexually satisfy their partners
– Any perceived homosexuality, particularly in their backline
– Perceived disabilities of the match officials
– Suggestions that the parents of the match officials were from the same family unit

That should be fine, right?

Dear Economic Development Directorate,

I am troubled by some of the Brumbies’ song:

‘PROUD TO BE A BRUMBY’
(To the tune of ‘Click go the Shears’)

‘From the Heart of Mountain country, where the Brumby reigns supreme,
From the country’s capital there comes a rugby team,
We keep the spirit going, as we stick it to the foe,
And crush the opposition with the final telling blow.

Chorus

Stick to your guns boys, play with pride,
Hit it up the middle then spin the ball out wide,
Standing at the coalface, taking on the best,
Proud to be Australian with a Brumby on our chest.
…’

I feel that this is somewhat aggressive in tone, wouldn’t you agree? May I suggest:

‘From the womb of Mountain Country, where the Brumbies are sometimes adequate,
From the compromise between Sydney and Melbourne comes a rugby team and associated support staff,
We are aware of our strengths, while acknowledging work-shopped weaknesses, and attempt to achieve our goals,
And make it clear that we are a genuine force to be reckoned with, and look forward to meaningful discussions with the Waratahs [opposing team to be updated week to week].

Chorus

Put down those weapons, boys (and let us not rule out girls), play with satisfaction,
Attempt to assert oneself within the rules of the game,
While engaged in any useful industry, engage with all who would give consent to engagement,
And acknowledge the unique biodiversity of this section of Gondwanaland through sartorial representation.’

‘Cheer hard’, from your tweet, is perhaps a little overly masculine too. May I suggest ‘support in any way you might feel support may be appropriately expressed?’

Thank you for your time.

Salutations

Some comparatively (and certainly only physically) weak woman who thinks you should stick to economic development.

Ben_Dover said :

“Go Go Go Brumbies! Participate to the best of your abilities, but not in such a way as to humiliate or dishearten your opponents too much!
Hooray for the Brumbies!! While recognising the wonderful contribution of any our opponents who are non-white in a manner which respects them as equal!!
Go Brumbies Go!! In a fully masculine and male oriented way, which respects women as equals and does not disparage any gay players, transsexuals, transvestites or dog sh@ggers!!

Now you’re talking!

Cheerleaders – a mixture of young, old, hale, infirm, of representative nationalities and skin colours, wearing non-exploitative dress (including burqas, if desired, by the Muslim women) – should lead those cheers at the game!

Reminds me of the Archie comic strip where Archie – as editor of the college newspaper – asks Betty to write a headline for the football report because Big Moose is ill. She looks at the headlines written by Moose such as “Riverdale Bombs Central” and thinks they are too violent sounding. She presents Archie with the headline “Riverdale Proves Itself To Be The Better Competitor”.

You do have to give them credit for their spelling though! It is better than the usual standard.

“Go Go Go Brumbies! Participate to the best of your abilities, but not in such a way as to humiliate or dishearten your opponents too much!
Hooray for the Brumbies!! While recognising the wonderful contribution of any our opponents who are non-white in a manner which respects them as equal!!
Go Brumbies Go!! In a fully masculine and male oriented way, which respects women as equals and does not disparage any gay players, transsexuals, transvestites or dog sh@ggers!!

I wonder if referring to unsatisfactory players as “girls” comes under this?

“…remember racist or sexist remarks have no place in sport.”

I was going to say that delivering this message via Twitter is unintentionally ironic… but on second thought it might be genius.

CrocodileGandhi10:52 am 04 May 12

I’m glad that I’ve recieved this information in time. My plan was to remain mostly quiet at the gae, only breaking the silence to hurl racial slurs at Henry Speight. I won’t be doing that anymore.

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