6 January 2009

What's the worst thing you've seen a diplomat doing?

| johnboy
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The ACT has a large diplomatic corp. To some extent they’re beyond the law.

Most of course do not abuse the privilege, but there are bad eggs everywhere.

So, dear readers, what’s the worst thing you’ve encountered a diplomat doing in Canberra?

(If you haven’t actually seen it yourself make sure you clearly describe your sources).

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And there’s always good old trial by media if they try to get away with anything…

^ Certified Gold! ^

Once I was doing ‘Limbo’ with a few friends. I was quite good at it, but one of my mates, Matt, wasn’t as good.
We decided to give him some support by cheering when it was his go.
“DIP LOW, MATT!” we would yell.

btw, the original version of that joke goes for much longer than that. Aristocrats are much more offensive than diplomats.

A joke based on The Aristocrats
A family with a pet dog walk into the office of an entertainment agent. The father says “We’ve got an act for you”. The agent says “We don’t take any family acts”. But the father insists of showing him, and the agent finally agrees.

The father beats up the agent, while the kids start drawing on the walls. Then the mother starts buying products over the phone, using a credit card but she has no intention of paying. The dog takes a dump on the carpet, and then the kids start using that mess to smear on the agents table.

Finally the family go outside, and smash up the agents car.
They come back inside, and take a bow.

After the act, the agent is open-jawed. “I’ve never seen anything like that before. What do you call that act”

The father replies “The Diplomats”

Best one I saw was a son of a diplomat pay over $5000 in speed camera fines. He was a uni student and asked for a discount for being a student as well. He was not going to lose his licence even though he run up about 20 points on his provisional licence. But at least he paid them.

Saudi Bob ring a bell?

Well he certainly ended up being sent back to Saudi Arabia – after being tagged and bagged!

Thats why “DC” plates stand for “Don’t Care” driver…

Beserk Keyboard Warrior10:03 am 07 Jan 09

I once saw a Diplomat get behind the wheel of a car. That was pretty scary.

fnaah said :

Just to tip this on its head a bit, who’s heard stories of Aussie diplomats in “dry” countries hosting cocktail parties and vagrantly flaunting the local laws?

Yeah, me too.

That would be because Australia is not a dry country. When you are on diplomatic soil it is the land of the country the diplomat is from. If you goto the American Embassy in Canberra it is US Soil.
I worked in the Chinese Embassy for a concert and they did not have any OH&S laws – they were using ladders made out of old fence pailings and when I asked the guy to not use it around me as I felt in danger, he said there’s no rules in this country. They also did not want me to tape electrical cords down over doorways, when I said it was against OH&S laws the guy said to me “not by chineese law, you in China now”.

circusmind said :

JC said :

Immunity is automatic and near absolute. It can be waived by the diplomat’s government if they so choose, but otherwise the diplomat enjoys (almost) full immunity from criminal and civil action while they are posted here. That is the current international law, which is given effect by domestic legislation in Australia. So no, a copper cannot arrest a dippo, nor fine him, etc.

Bzzzt on the fine front and legaly right on the other but not in practice.

Have a look at the link below (specificaly about foreign Dipo’s driving in Aus):

https://www.dfat.gov.au/protocol/Protocol_Guidelines/08.html

and

https://www.dfat.gov.au/protocol/Protocol_Guidelines/

BTW the worst thing I’ve ever seen a dipo do was avoiding paper balls being thrown from the windows of the old DFAT building. We were throwing them at a mate and the Mexican ambassador to Australia got in the way. He had the audacity to duck our best efforts.

complaints about diplomats are sent through the dean of the diplomatic corps who then talks to the embassy concerned. I think most dipos are ok but when they come from a country run by a corrupt regime, there’s no chance they’re going to tow the line here.

I have a relative at DFAT who, while posted to Saudi, used to get a new set of hi fi speakers every few months. They had no woofers or tweeters but were full of Johnny Walker Blue label……………..which were given to Sheikhs when invited for dinner.

JC said :

They get this protection so that they can do their job. Most of what you read in the paper and the anadoctes here about immunity are total bullshit. The eally post from P1 is spot on. Things like traffic fines etc are meant to be payed. Immunity is not automatic and must be requested through the head of state. Ie a Dipo cannot just tell a copper to nick off and claim immunity.

Immunity is automatic and near absolute. It can be waived by the diplomat’s government if they so choose, but otherwise the diplomat enjoys (almost) full immunity from criminal and civil action while they are posted here. That is the current international law, which is given effect by domestic legislation in Australia. So no, a copper cannot arrest a dippo, nor fine him, etc.

Will noone think of the children?

V twin venom said :

The worst thing a lot of these arrogant bastards have done is stain our beatiful shores with their very presence.

On the other hand we send them people from DFAT, so we probably end up ahead.

I am ashamed to say that some of us act the same when we are in foreign countries as a diplomat.

I have seen it.

A family member (I will not say how I am related) used to be a complete %$#^stick in a car because they knew they could not get into trouble.

It’s an embarrassing memory and I am sorry.

H1NG0 said :

I don’t know what the rules are, but for him to tear up the piece of paper in front of me, I’m guessing the police can’t do shit.

Guess again, there is a lot that could happen, including having your right to drive in Australia revoked and being shown the door if you keep it up. Destroying Daddy’s diplomatic career isn’t a smart thing to do in some, if not most, cultures

If a diplomat causes embarrassment to his home nation he/she will be ripped home quick smart. If they are naughty people (and that includes not paying fines) their right to stay can be re-assessed by our govt.

Lets just say that either causing embarrassment to your country or getting punted out for not paying fines may well do a lot of damage to your future diplomatic career.

Be clear about it, there isn’t a plague of DC cars getting pinged for whatever and screaming diplomatic immunity. By and large diplomats standards of behaviour is far better than your average bogan, and so it should be.

Just think of how a diplomat from, say, the middle east, will be treated on getting back to wherever after embarrassing his country and getting punted out of Oz

The Yogoslav who shot German Shepherd in Sydney. Thne walked away.

p1 said :

Although, it raises interesting questions about why diplomats get these protections, and what parts of a countries “culture” are politically correct, import human rights, and what parts are inappropriate fluanting or human rights?

They get this protection so that they can do their job. Most of what you read in the paper and the anadoctes here about immunity are total bullshit. The eally post from P1 is spot on. Things like traffic fines etc are meant to be payed. Immunity is not automatic and must be requested through the head of state. Ie a Dipo cannot just tell a copper to nick off and claim immunity.

‘What is the worst thing you’ve seen a diplomat do?’

Dance

randalpennington5:30 pm 06 Jan 09

I’ve seen them swimming in Googong dam and they were blwing their noses into the water and stuff..

not what we want.

May have been the guy who did some damage to a family member’s car a few years back. He was at fault but got verbally abusive when they tried to talk to him, declared he was a diplomat and therefore not liable. End of story.

My friends from a while back had Diplomat parents. His dad was drunk one night, crashed into another womans car and sped away declaring ‘diplomatic immunity’.
He divorced later, so it’s ok.
Karma god judges all!

V twin venom4:24 pm 06 Jan 09

Now THAT is funny.

Fnaah, I think you will find that the ‘dry’ countries grudgingly allow ‘wet’ diplomats to import/access grog.

Many years ago, the (Islamic) foreign ministry rang a major European embassy to advise them that unfortunately the wharfies had dropped the grand piano the embassy was expecting, and could they please come and get it as it was leaking.

caf said :

vagrantly?

As in, in the manner of someone homeless?

would that be flagrantly taunting homeless people?

Although, it raises interesting questions about why diplomats get these protections, and what parts of a countries “culture” are politically correct, import human rights, and what parts are inappropriate fluanting or human rights?

vagrantly?

As in, in the manner of someone homeless?

V twin venom4:00 pm 06 Jan 09

Good point^. I guess with protection comes disrespect for the norm.

Just to tip this on its head a bit, who’s heard stories of Aussie diplomats in “dry” countries hosting cocktail parties and vagrantly flaunting the local laws?

Yeah, me too.

Sorry my misunderstanding venom.

V twin venom3:41 pm 06 Jan 09

Good riddance

V twin venom said :

Don’t get me wrong jakez, this thread is presicely about diplomats that visit our fair land and ignore both the moral and legal standards prescribed by our society. Those who respect and embrace those standards are wonderful (I have met many), those arrogant bastards who show no respect of our standards while on their diplomatic mission deserve every bit of my venom, and yours!

what about their compatriots, that break our laws, then get sent home for being bad?

V twin venom3:09 pm 06 Jan 09

Don’t get me wrong jakez, this thread is presicely about diplomats that visit our fair land and ignore both the moral and legal standards prescribed by our society. Those who respect and embrace those standards are wonderful (I have met many), those arrogant bastards who show no respect of our standards while on their diplomatic mission deserve every bit of my venom, and yours!

V twin venom said :

The worst thing a lot of these arrogant bastards have done is stain our beatiful shores with their very presence.

…well you got the venom bit of your name right.

V twin venom2:11 pm 06 Jan 09

The worst thing a lot of these arrogant bastards have done is stain our beatiful shores with their very presence.

VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy2:10 pm 06 Jan 09

No point, other than letting us all have a good, therapeutic bitch.

grunge_hippy2:05 pm 06 Jan 09

whats the point of this thread?

VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy1:38 pm 06 Jan 09

Did you actually see this? What sort of perve wants to watch that?

Raping their Phillipino maid.

Holden Caulfield1:04 pm 06 Jan 09

ant said :

The vietnamese bakery at Kingston makes excellent Diplomat cakes…

Dobinsons used to make awesome Berry Diplomats … I wish they brought those back.

The Canberra Times was inetesting reading? Wash your mouth out boy!

Ozhair said :

Wasn’t there a bit of a stir-up a number of years back, where the Russian embassy had clocked up thousands of dollars in parking and traffic offenses and was refusing to pay?

The Canberra Times obtained a list at one stage of which embassies owed what in unpaid fines, etc, and it made very interesting reading!

Wasn’t there a bit of a stir-up a number of years back, where the Russian embassy had clocked up thousands of dollars in parking and traffic offenses and was refusing to pay?

The vietnamese bakery at Kingston makes excellent Diplomat cakes…

In the early 1980s, the Indonesian Ambassador to NZ ran down and killed a pedestrian in Wellington whilst driving home pissed – and apparently apart from being recalled to Jakarta by Suharto, the NZ authorities were unable to touch him.

I particuly hate seeing DC cars parked in disabled spots, and you should have seen the look on the face of one offender the day I called him an “effing cee” for parking in a disabled spot!

I used to work at an service station where we served several of the diplomats from a particularly impoverished nation.

They used put their car and those of their friends and family through the same bowser. They then used to do the weekly shopping in our exceptionally overpriced grocery section.

They would then pay for everything with their fuel card.

We need to go all Lethal Weapon 2 on them…

Arjen Rudd – “Diplomatic immunity!”

Murtaugh – “Has just been revoked!” – BLAM!!!

He was decaffinated! hahaha! Classic!

I saw a diplomat once.

One ran a red light when myself and another driver were taking off as we had the green light. As we weren’t going fast we had enough time to slam on the brakes.

The idiot swerved to miss, us doing well over 110kms on Belconnen Way.

aronde said :

Travelling along Parkes Way the DC plated car in front would be in the left hand lane approaching the roundabout, then cut across to the right hand lane whilst on the roundabout, then move back to the left once through! Did this consistently all the way to the airport and nearly took out the guy who went past me who wrongly thought travelling in the right hand lane of a roundabout was a safe option next to this guy!

I’m afraid it’s not only drivers in DC plated cars that do that…

My cars habcaps are held on by the wheel nuts.

I can’t wait for the day we purchase hub caps because alloys are too “standard” 😉 Fair point VY. On the topic of Diplomats, I have seen plenty of bad DC drivers, too many to mention.

Travelling along Parkes Way the DC plated car in front would be in the left hand lane approaching the roundabout, then cut across to the right hand lane whilst on the roundabout, then move back to the left once through! Did this consistently all the way to the airport and nearly took out the guy who went past me who wrongly thought travelling in the right hand lane of a roundabout was a safe option next to this guy!

VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy10:48 am 06 Jan 09

People steal hubcaps because factory replacements aren’t cheap. More and more cars these days come with alloy wheels as standard, however, so hopefully we won’t have to worry about hubcaps much longer.

Overtaking me on my motorbike, at 80km/h, on a nice wide dual-carriageway with two lanes in each direction…IN THE SAME FREAKING LANE AS ME!

There was nobody in the right hand lane, I was doing the speed limit, and this twat decided that the appropriate place to pass me was 5cm from my bike. There was significant use of both the horn and finger, I can assure you. Pretty sure he didn’t even notice.

I should add that I was friends with a former diplomatic family here and they were very careful about being good citizens in every respect – far more so than many native Canberrans – as you say, and as with so many things raised on this site, it’s just the few that give the many a bad name.

I don’t know what the rules are, but for him to tear up the piece of paper in front of me, I’m guessing the police can’t do shit.

Why the hell would someone steal hubcaps? What a stooge.

Actually, my understanding is that the police can ask the the country in question to make their person pay the fine, or face more serious charges, and then it could escalate to the point where the person is declared “persona non grata”. In practice I think this doesn’t happen, or even if they get asked to pay the fine, they don’t loose points….

Before this thread gets off the ground I just want to dispel the myth that diplomats drivers can do whatever they want speed/double park etc and get away with it. They have to pay the fine et al. Sucks to be an Australian citizen I guess.

The actual diplomats and their foreign staff though…

as mentioned in another thread, I caught a diplomatic corp car driver trying to remove the hubcaps from my car. He stopped, and drove off. I bet he was a bit surprised when he found me standing over him, along with a few of my family and friends…

I once worked with a guy who was the son of a diplomat. He was caught doing 200Kmh in an 80 zone. He brought the ticket into work, showed us all, then ripped it up and laughed. Apparently there is nothing the coppers can do but “hope” that he does the right thing and pays for the ticket. On top of that, he was an irritating little turd.

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