Sexual assault left woman feeling like she was murdered, but her body was 'left alive'

CONTENT WARNING: This article discusses a sexual assault.

A woman raped by her friend has told a court how the assault meant her soul, spirit and “all the little things” that made her up “have been crushed”.

“I feel like I have been murdered, but my body has been left alive,” she told the ACT Supreme Court at Thomas Earle’s sentence hearing.

“I want justice for him assaulting my body, sure. But what I really want is justice for him assaulting my spirit.”

The 26-year-old Earle was found guilty on charges of committing an act of indecency and sexual intercourse without consent at the end of his jury trial earlier this year.

His victim addressed the court in person on Friday (14 April), detailing the devastating impact the rape has had on her.

“This violent removal of the right to my own body has crept its way into every nook and cranny of my life and obliterated every understanding I had of myself and the world,” she said.

She said no matter what she did in the weeks afterwards, she couldn’t feel clean.

“I would wash myself with bleach to try and kill any part of him that could have remained on my skin,” she said.

“I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror without seeing the parts of me that he helped himself to.”

She self-medicated with alcohol for months because she wanted to feel numb, missed days of work because she couldn’t focus and eventually left her job and moved back in with her parents so they could support her.

She talked about how every morning she would wake up and count down the days to when Earle’s trial was to start.

When it did, she said the scrutiny and cross-examination in the courtroom were “immensely emotionally draining, triggering feelings of shame, guilt and self-doubt”.

“The fear of not being believed or being blamed was a constant presence, exacerbating my anxiety and depression,” she said.

The victim also said she felt unsafe around men for months after the assault and could not be around them without feeling like it was going to happen again.

“But as I slipped further down the road of depression and substance abuse, I began to want control again,” she said.

“I was reckless and promiscuous, not having sex for pleasure or because I was attracted to these people, but because I wanted to prove that I was in control.”

Prosecutor Beth Morrisroe told the court that the issue to be decided on sentencing was whether Earle should be sent to jail or receive a community-based order. She called for full-time custody.

Earle wrote a letter for the court, but the prosecutor argued it was about the hardships he had suffered himself and was not a letter that demonstrated a particular insight into the impact of his behaviour.

She said material from the defence had a reasonably significant focus on the media attention his trial had attracted, but she argued that was a consequence of his actions and open justice and it shouldn’t be considered extra-curial punishment.

Ms Morrisroe also argued that he was not an offender who fell into any exceptional category: he was in his 20s, came from a good family and had support in the community. These factors didn’t mitigate against the need for general deterrence, she said.

Earle’s barrister, James Sabharwal, said a report had been provided for the court that talked about his client’s mental illness and depression.

The report said his mental health had deteriorated since the assault.

Chief Justice Lucy McCallum said her impression from an exchange of messages between Earle and the victim after the assault was that he had made a demonstration of remorse.

During the trial, jurors had heard that in December 2021, Earle and the woman had dinner, drank alcohol, consumed ”jungle juice”, smoked marijuana and watched a movie before she went to bed.

She woke about 2 am to find him touching her genitals, before he removed her underwear. She claimed she tried to stop him, but couldn’t.

Earle raped her until she said, “Wait, wait, wait”, and he stopped to ask if it was OK.

He will be sentenced on 28 April. Bail was continued.