Kids: how loud is too loud in Canberra?

Robertson said :

Pitchka said :

Robertson said :

My children dine on good, wholesome food, preferably bought in-season or on-special. The cost per meal varies, but would usually be somewhere between 75c and $4.

If I felt like spending close to $10 feeding them, then yes, I would by an expensive cut of meat and make a delicious meal of it.

People who spend big wads of cash buying the tasteless and barely-edible garbage on offer at McDonalds are displaying an extremely poor decision-making ability.

That’s pretty harsh. I wish I had the mental and physical energy to prepare home cooked, nutritious meals at home EVERY NIGHT, but sometimes I am so tired from looking after the family that I relent and allow McDonald’s. Not very often, but every now and then. The kids love it and have a good time, so what’s the problem? Better to stay sane than worry about the odd meal of ‘barely-edible garbage’ that your kids must ‘endure’ (or should I say ‘relish’).

Macca’s brings out the best in parents, I find. I remember being honked at by a mum with kids as I was crossing the entrance to Dickson Macca’s carpark with a group of mates during a free period at College. We were just walking along the footpath and we had right of way so I gave her the finger told her what I thought of her. Maybe it’s not the thing to do in front of kids but I was still a kid then too, technically, but her reaction (following us down the road in her soccer-mum SUV yelling at us not “f***ing swear in front of [her] ****ing kids”) was priceless. At least I was assured that any damage my actions might done to the kids in the back had already been done by Mummy Dearest, but still, people are crazy.

Just one of those post that brings out the ‘haters will hate’ kind of posters, hey.

People can hardly expect you to carry a decibel gauge to make sure your kids don’t yell or laugh that little bit too loud. We know what appropriate levels are inside a restaurant for example. “Normal speaking voice” level. That’s easy to assess and control. But at a playground? Totally subjective and really not that important.

Agree, let kids be kids. And people who are that quick to judge – referring to both the parent in the story and some commenters – probably do so because of some major insecurity or guilt complex or something. I do not trust them so I ignore them.

Gerry-Built said :

I don’t know how you…

“you”; not directed at A-cog… (more at those saying I was rude and out of line)

Gerry-Built said :

A_Cog said :

I defy anyone to not return volley if your children are attacked to your face…

You only have to read my replys to see im on your side, infact, i dont even know why you bothered apologising about giving her the bird..

A_Cog said :

Don’t fret over your choices by attempting to validate them via RA input, avoid getting into fisti-cuffs over a trivial issue, and let their/your frustrations go.

I’m not “trying to validate my actions”; I own them, good or bad. I made a poor choice at the end of this 2 minute interaction; which I apologised for. I was quite civil until then; despite the verbal abuse she gave me in front of ALL our kids; including telling me my kids “belong in a zoo”…

I was wondering what people though was too loud, for a child’s playground at a “restaurant”; and I’m prepared to change my position on that given some of the RA hivemind feedback. I don’t know how you can focus on my rudeness – letting one solitary bird fly; when she started off in the way she did. I defy anyone to not return volley if your children are attacked to your face…

I can’t really judge the OP either way but I will note that there is a difference between kids being a bit noisy whilst playing and the banshee wail of a feral Bogan’s spawn.

I thought I’d stay out of this, seeing as I know Gerry_Built in r/t AND I have had his children at my house, this is getting ridiculous.

They’re not terrors, in fact they’re normal kids and I would have them at my house again. Kids make noise. Get over it. It’s a playground and it was being used as such.

Was flipping the bird the wrong thing? Yes. However, if approached in a negative way to begin with, most people respond in a negative way particularly if it’s your child that is being spoken about in that way.

Did he own his behaviour? Yes. Most people wouldn’t go back and apologise but yet he did.

carnardly said :

well as long as you think you’re doing a good job then that’s all that counts right…?

well; as I’ve made quite clear – I am open to input… feel free…

thatsnotme said :

A_Cog said :

Don’t fret over your choices by attempting to validate them via RA input, avoid getting into fisti-cuffs over a trivial issue, and let their/your frustrations go.

Now this, I think, is the best opinion expressed in the entire thread. I couldn’t agree more.

isn’t that what forums are for??? RA would be pretty quiet if we all took that advice

anyway he didn’t take on the responses anyway (searching only for confirmation of previous opinion) – although i respect the time taken to respond to posts

A_Cog said :

Don’t fret over your choices by attempting to validate them via RA input, avoid getting into fisti-cuffs over a trivial issue, and let their/your frustrations go.

Now this, I think, is the best opinion expressed in the entire thread. I couldn’t agree more.

#3
-I wasn’t letting all “rules off”; in fact, I relocated to outside table nearest playground when the kids asked to play out there (lady was at furthest possible table)
-I take your comments on board; I assume you would also agree she could have approached it better, for example “excuse me, I’m finding your kids a little loud – could you ask them to be quiet” – her “approach” was rude from the start
-I agree I could have handled myself better (hence I was honest about that in OP), but I was already in “fight” response after her terse reprimand

So she “started it” but you had to finish it. Who frigging cares. Yes you definitely lowered yourself to the lowest of the low. At least now you won’t do that again.

#5
-my very reason for asking this on here is I don’t see my kids’ behaviour as inappropriate; so I wanted to seek the advice of others
-my children wouldn’t be allowed to behave the way you described in the restaurant in your post
-I’m not blame shifting; I don’t think my kids’ did ANYTHING wrong – I’d be the first to acknowledge, however; that I did.

No – you’re not blame shifting as you don’t think your kids were doing anything wrong. Well, maybe they were loud, maybe they weren’t. Maybe they were angels. We don’t know as none of us were there. Maybe this other woman was having a bad day. But you got your back up and cracked an angry rather than behaving like an adult.

#8
-there was nothing polite about how she raised the issue; hence she got my back up, and as I left I flipped the bird (absolutely the wrong response, I realised, and did go back to apologise to her for it)

So who cares if “she said this” and you did that. If you are an adult it’s up to you to behave like one. you can’t control others or their actions. At least you now get that you were an idiot.

#12
-my kids were already out front getting their gear; hence I took the opportunity to flip the bird (and I am really upset at myself for that behaviour; she followed me out to call me on that – I thought about it, agreed, and went back in to apologise to her)
– I try to model appropriate behaviour for my kids; but that was a slip-up on my part

A slip up – or an excuse…… ?

#17
-”acceptable and reasonable” Really? First thing it did was rile me up; I would almost certainly have responded to a reasonable request

Again – what a mean old lady saying nasty things about my delightful (albeit but loud) angels…

#27
–
All in all; I feel vindicated that my kids did nothing wrong; they were definitely loud, but not running amok. I don’t feel the lady approached this in a reasonable way – and she got a reaction out of me that I am really quite embarrassed about; my behaviour was poor; as was hers – but none of the kids involved. I’d have quite happily asked the kids to keep it down if she’d asked (and actually did ask them, despite her approach) – instead she made a rude, loud and snide comment in front of all the children (including hers).

BTW: her kids were well-behaved and all the kids were playing nicely together (as loud as mine were)…

There are many ways to raise kids ‘properly’, many opinions, clearly – but if my kids are being a concern for another parent, I’m more likely to react in a measured/appropriate way if I’m approached about it in the same manner. I think we are well passed “seen and not heard” and we should allow kids to be kids…

My kids are generally well-behaved; and I think I do a good job as a parent, on the whole. I’m no Super-Nanny – but then, neither am I like the families she deals with…

well as long as you think you’re doing a good job then that’s all that counts right…?

milkman said :

Sticking your finger up at another parent is a great way to raise the feral assholes of tomorrow. They do what you do, not what you say.

I agree with this… My kids didn’t see that (and no other kids did either)…Doesn’t excuse it – it was appalling on my behalf; she called me on it, and when I had time to simmer on it a few seconds – I went back to offer an apology… for the rudeness; not my opinion.

I didn’t expect this level of response or controversy… I’ll try and respond to most questions raised:
#1
-my children were not being a ‘dominant force’ in the playground (I had my 3 and their friend); they WERE being loud (mostly chasing each other and tickling each other).
-I wouldn’t allow my kids to dominate (they’ve been raised to take turns, watch out for smaller kids etc), and would speak up to any other child who was, too
-They were having a slushie as a treat on our walk after having played at the skate park (though I believe ‘junk food’ is okay as an occasional treat as long as overall diet is good)

#2
-wasn’t Macca’s but didn’t want to drag the establishment into this (had nothing to do with it except being where it happened)

#3
-I wasn’t letting all “rules off”; in fact, I relocated to outside table nearest playground when the kids asked to play out there (lady was at furthest possible table)
-I take your comments on board; I assume you would also agree she could have approached it better, for example “excuse me, I’m finding your kids a little loud – could you ask them to be quiet” – her “approach” was rude from the start
-I agree I could have handled myself better (hence I was honest about that in OP), but I was already in “fight” response after her terse reprimand

#5
-my very reason for asking this on here is I don’t see my kids’ behaviour as inappropriate; so I wanted to seek the advice of others
-my children wouldn’t be allowed to behave the way you described in the restaurant in your post
-I’m not blame shifting; I don’t think my kids’ did ANYTHING wrong – I’d be the first to acknowledge, however; that I did.

#8
-there was nothing polite about how she raised the issue; hence she got my back up, and as I left I flipped the bird (absolutely the wrong response, I realised, and did go back to apologise to her for it)

#12
-my kids were already out front getting their gear; hence I took the opportunity to flip the bird (and I am really upset at myself for that behaviour; she followed me out to call me on that – I thought about it, agreed, and went back in to apologise to her)
– I try to model appropriate behaviour for my kids; but that was a slip-up on my part

#13
-I agree 100% with the entirety of your post

#17
-“acceptable and reasonable” Really? First thing it did was rile me up; I would almost certainly have responded to a reasonable request

#27
-agree 100%

All in all; I feel vindicated that my kids did nothing wrong; they were definitely loud, but not running amok. I don’t feel the lady approached this in a reasonable way – and she got a reaction out of me that I am really quite embarrassed about; my behaviour was poor; as was hers – but none of the kids involved. I’d have quite happily asked the kids to keep it down if she’d asked (and actually did ask them, despite her approach) – instead she made a rude, loud and snide comment in front of all the children (including hers).

BTW: her kids were well-behaved and all the kids were playing nicely together (as loud as mine were)…

There are many ways to raise kids ‘properly’, many opinions, clearly – but if my kids are being a concern for another parent, I’m more likely to react in a measured/appropriate way if I’m approached about it in the same manner. I think we are well passed “seen and not heard” and we should allow kids to be kids…

My kids are generally well-behaved; and I think I do a good job as a parent, on the whole. I’m no Super-Nanny – but then, neither am I like the families she deals with…

It doesn’t matter whether you were over the line or not. We live in a medium-density world, where it is inevitable that someone will be annoyed by you/your kids at some point for some reason. You drive too fast/slow, your renovation is too big, your kids are too loud, you stand too close, you take too long at the ATM/counter…

Don’t fret over your choices by attempting to validate them via RA input, avoid getting into fisti-cuffs over a trivial issue, and let their/your frustrations go.

“Today I didn’t even have to use my A.K.
I got to say it was a good day.”
– Ice Cube

If a DINK (double income, no kids) – type person told you this, then yeah you’re justified, but were rude. The fact it was another parent who presumably knows what a loud child is like at times, then you were unjustified, and still rude.

If your kids are screaming or squealing for now reason then yeah, they need to be controlled.

Sticking your finger up at another parent is a great way to raise the feral assholes of tomorrow. They do what you do, not what you say.

Ok, here’s where it’s at with me. I don’t have children, so I’m potentially one of those people who will complain if kids are going mutant around me.
Though, I can safely I haven’t.
Why?

Because if I’m at a fast food joint that has a play ground, I don’t go near it. I don’t need to. And if I’m inside, I pick my seat away from families.

If I’m at a park, I sit away from families with kids– let them have the park.

It’s all about being considerate… and I am ever hopeful that if I extend this kind of consideration towards parents and children that if their kids do start to get too loud or intrusive that parents will pull the reigns in if needs be. In the same respect, I would like to think that if a parent has an issue with another parents children, they will be considerate and set a good example for the children in the area in challenging the behaviour.

Robertson said :

Pitchka said :

Robertson said :

I mean – you feed them at McDonalds…what more needs to be said?

Your kids only dine on the finest scotch fillet and hydroponic vegetables? D**khead.

No, I can’t afford to spend money on either of these options.

My children dine on good, wholesome food, preferably bought in-season or on-special. The cost per meal varies, but would usually be somewhere between 75c and $4.

If I felt like spending close to $10 feeding them, then yes, I would by an expensive cut of meat and make a delicious meal of it.

People who spend big wads of cash buying the tasteless and barely-edible garbage on offer at McDonalds are displaying an extremely poor decision-making ability.

But I can afford it and I like the taste.

I raise my daughter to have fun.
I raise my daughter to be respectful of other people.
I play with my daughter in the playground.
I teach my daughter to hit back.
She shares, waits in line, laughs, squeals, pinches, hits, grabs, includes others.

She is a child.

Really had a chuckle with the “good old days… blahblah… seen and not heard” comments. Because your parents took you to places like Maccas how often back then? What I remember from those days is not being supervised every second of my young life. And that is why I had an opportunity to run amok with other kids and we could scream and yell and even bully eachother if we wanted to because there wasn’t an adult in sight and kids didn’t really talk to adults so they would never find out what we did while we were out.

I have trained my child to observe certain rules at playgrounds like waiting her turn, not walking up the slide the wrong way when there’s other kids, etc. But using our ‘outside voices’ at a playground (a ‘Maccas’ playground FFS!) should be permitted and I wouldn’t tell her off over it.

Pitchka said :

Robertson said :

I mean – you feed them at McDonalds…what more needs to be said?

Your kids only dine on the finest scotch fillet and hydroponic vegetables? D**khead.

No, I can’t afford to spend money on either of these options.

My children dine on good, wholesome food, preferably bought in-season or on-special. The cost per meal varies, but would usually be somewhere between 75c and $4.

If I felt like spending close to $10 feeding them, then yes, I would by an expensive cut of meat and make a delicious meal of it.

People who spend big wads of cash buying the tasteless and barely-edible garbage on offer at McDonalds are displaying an extremely poor decision-making ability.

I reckon you were well within your rights. Even if your chillen were being more annoying than the average child in a Macca’s playpen (which would be quite an achievement), the mum who made the snarky comment was being incredibly rude and I commend you for just flipping her off, I would have given her some explicit instructions to go along with it.

johnboy said :

OK children you’ve each had a go now chill out the personal abuse.

awwww, he started it :)p

OK children you’ve each had a go now chill out the personal abuse.

Pitchka said :

zorro29 said :

you’re right pitchka, why should /anyone/ alter their behaviour in public spaces? that’s not how the world works at all! we should be able to do what we want, when we want and to hell with everyone else!

seriously??? there definitely should be more restrictions when dining out but even in parks/playgrounds, there are boundaries on behaviour and no children should cause disruption to the comfort and enjoyment of others whether through excessive noise, running around or anything else

and, from other posters, non-bogans are allowed to eat maccas now and then without having to deal with screaming kids. i love a good mac now and then but i can’t ever eat in one of them for this reason

What a retarded reply.. No one is suggesting that there are no ‘rules’ when it comes to kids playing in a public place. If anyone feels as thoe they should be able to attend a public place, designed for children to play, yet at the same time be able to enjoy the serenity and peace and quiet, need to get the f**k out more. As long as the children are behaving, and not harming or hurting themselves or others and playing safely.. then whats the issue.

Id love for someone to tell me that my children are being too loud when in a public place desinged for them to play and let off steam… Ill show them what loud is when i tell the to get f’d so the whole establishment can hear me.

Perhaps you should consider using the drive through.

you use the term “retarded” as an insult?? how charming and sensitive of you.

but, given your response, i may be expecting too much from you. you’re exactly the kind of person (and parent) who doesn’t get it and never will

enjoy abusing people and “getting loud” and aggressive like the neanderthal you are

have a great day

Pitchka said :

DeskMonkey said :

zorro29 said :

I know my response will bring on a barrage of complaint and snark, but I have an opinion too so here it is…

I am always surprised (and shocked) at the increasingly entitled attitude of parents. When I was young, we were seen and not heard – the kind of behaviour I see now would never have been allowed.

A friend of mine (who is otherwise very reasonable and intelligent) was out at dinner with my partner and I and brought her children. Her 2 year old son screamed down the place and ran around the restaurant (going up to other tables etc). Her response was “What people don’t realise is that he will be louder if left in his chair. If people don’t want to deal with children they should eat out later at night”

I thought this was ridiculous. People who don’t have children (or don’t want to put up with the poor behaviour of other children) must inconvenience themselves and eat very late so it’s not “family time”.

Parents need to take responsibility for their own children and recognise that there is reasonable behaviour for public spaces which involves minimising noise and running around (including in playgrounds). If they want to scream, let them do it in your OWN house so only you have to deal with it (and it’s not being inflicted on others who have no choice).

And your response just shows how ridiculous parents can be – very classy of you. The correct response was to calm your children down a little so they were still having fun but not being too disruptive.

But, of course, it’s always someone else’s fault hey? Never just poor behaviour and lack of discipline.

+1 I’m mortified if we’re out to dinner and my daughter screams and carries on. She’s not allowed to do it at home why should she do it when we’re old. Call me old fashioned but my daughter is learning her manners and how to use them, including table manners when eating out.

Park/outdoor behaviour, and behaviour when dining out are 2 different scenarios, which cannot be compared.

Our kids too are required to alter their behaviour depending on where we are, but suggestions that kids need to shut up or keep the noise down when outdoors or in a public park becasue someones finds it ‘loud’, is simply stupid.

I have to agree to some point, but as Pitchka has pointed out this is two different scenarios. I also don’t like kids running around/making a fuss in a indoor setting, but if its outdoor park or outdoor fast food playhouse then you have to have a degree of sense that it was built for that purpose.

The people complaining about noisy kids most likely go to places likes of Monkey Mania etc and expect to be able to sit down for a quiet cup of coffee.

Robertson said :

I mean – you feed them at McDonalds…what more needs to be said?

Your kids only dine on the finest scotch fillet and hydroponic vegetables? D**khead.

zorro29 said :

you’re right pitchka, why should /anyone/ alter their behaviour in public spaces? that’s not how the world works at all! we should be able to do what we want, when we want and to hell with everyone else!

seriously??? there definitely should be more restrictions when dining out but even in parks/playgrounds, there are boundaries on behaviour and no children should cause disruption to the comfort and enjoyment of others whether through excessive noise, running around or anything else

and, from other posters, non-bogans are allowed to eat maccas now and then without having to deal with screaming kids. i love a good mac now and then but i can’t ever eat in one of them for this reason

What a retarded reply.. No one is suggesting that there are no ‘rules’ when it comes to kids playing in a public place. If anyone feels as thoe they should be able to attend a public place, designed for children to play, yet at the same time be able to enjoy the serenity and peace and quiet, need to get the f**k out more. As long as the children are behaving, and not harming or hurting themselves or others and playing safely.. then whats the issue.

Id love for someone to tell me that my children are being too loud when in a public place desinged for them to play and let off steam… Ill show them what loud is when i tell the to get f’d so the whole establishment can hear me.

Perhaps you should consider using the drive through.

I think
“oh good, does that mean we’re only going to be subjected to the yelling and screaming for another two minutes!?”
Is a perfectly acceptable and diplomatic way of saying, “your children are absolutely revolting and they have been making our lives a misery and we will be glad when they are gone”.

Your obscene response to her valid remark pretty much validates her complaint – revolting parents, revolting children.

I mean – you feed them at McDonalds…what more needs to be said?

you’re right pitchka, why should /anyone/ alter their behaviour in public spaces? that’s not how the world works at all! we should be able to do what we want, when we want and to hell with everyone else!

seriously??? there definitely should be more restrictions when dining out but even in parks/playgrounds, there are boundaries on behaviour and no children should cause disruption to the comfort and enjoyment of others whether through excessive noise, running around or anything else

and, from other posters, non-bogans are allowed to eat maccas now and then without having to deal with screaming kids. i love a good mac now and then but i can’t ever eat in one of them for this reason

Maybe the woman who complained made a mistake and thought she was at a restaurant.

DeskMonkey said :

zorro29 said :

I know my response will bring on a barrage of complaint and snark, but I have an opinion too so here it is…

I am always surprised (and shocked) at the increasingly entitled attitude of parents. When I was young, we were seen and not heard – the kind of behaviour I see now would never have been allowed.

A friend of mine (who is otherwise very reasonable and intelligent) was out at dinner with my partner and I and brought her children. Her 2 year old son screamed down the place and ran around the restaurant (going up to other tables etc). Her response was “What people don’t realise is that he will be louder if left in his chair. If people don’t want to deal with children they should eat out later at night”

I thought this was ridiculous. People who don’t have children (or don’t want to put up with the poor behaviour of other children) must inconvenience themselves and eat very late so it’s not “family time”.

Parents need to take responsibility for their own children and recognise that there is reasonable behaviour for public spaces which involves minimising noise and running around (including in playgrounds). If they want to scream, let them do it in your OWN house so only you have to deal with it (and it’s not being inflicted on others who have no choice).

And your response just shows how ridiculous parents can be – very classy of you. The correct response was to calm your children down a little so they were still having fun but not being too disruptive.

But, of course, it’s always someone else’s fault hey? Never just poor behaviour and lack of discipline.

+1 I’m mortified if we’re out to dinner and my daughter screams and carries on. She’s not allowed to do it at home why should she do it when we’re old. Call me old fashioned but my daughter is learning her manners and how to use them, including table manners when eating out.

Park/outdoor behaviour, and behaviour when dining out are 2 different scenarios, which cannot be compared.

Our kids too are required to alter their behaviour depending on where we are, but suggestions that kids need to shut up or keep the noise down when outdoors or in a public park becasue someones finds it ‘loud’, is simply stupid.

I will state upfront that I don’t have children and I have not eaten McDonalds/HJs etc. for a good many years. I was, however, a child once (briefly, on a Thursday afternoon in mid-February some 30 years ago) and could have once been described as being a little sod by some.

With that out of the way…

Loud, obnoxious, bratty, feral children are to be expected at McDonalds, as are their loud, obnoxious, bratty, feral parents. The outdoor playgrounds do serve to remove the worst of them from within the confines of the food service area and place them in an environment where they can be free range.

However, “loud, boisterous behavior” comes in many differing forms. Were your children harassing the other children? Were they emitting that terrible, ear piercing squeal that some children seem to do regularly? If yes, you should have had them on a shorter leash; if no, the other person was being a whining malcontent. Either way, rude gesticulation is rather poor form, acknowledging that you did apologise.

So you gave the other parent “the bird” in front of your kids? Well we can see where they get their manners from.

Without a Sound Level (SPL) meter you’re not going to get a noise “limit” on your kids. If your kids are sticking out significantly, then it’s probably an issue.

DeskMonkey said :

zorro29 said :

I know my response will bring on a barrage of complaint and snark, but I have an opinion too so here it is…

I am always surprised (and shocked) at the increasingly entitled attitude of parents. When I was young, we were seen and not heard – the kind of behaviour I see now would never have been allowed.

A friend of mine (who is otherwise very reasonable and intelligent) was out at dinner with my partner and I and brought her children. Her 2 year old son screamed down the place and ran around the restaurant (going up to other tables etc). Her response was “What people don’t realise is that he will be louder if left in his chair. If people don’t want to deal with children they should eat out later at night”

I thought this was ridiculous. People who don’t have children (or don’t want to put up with the poor behaviour of other children) must inconvenience themselves and eat very late so it’s not “family time”.

Parents need to take responsibility for their own children and recognise that there is reasonable behaviour for public spaces which involves minimising noise and running around (including in playgrounds). If they want to scream, let them do it in your OWN house so only you have to deal with it (and it’s not being inflicted on others who have no choice).

And your response just shows how ridiculous parents can be – very classy of you. The correct response was to calm your children down a little so they were still having fun but not being too disruptive.

But, of course, it’s always someone else’s fault hey? Never just poor behaviour and lack of discipline.

+1 I’m mortified if we’re out to dinner and my daughter screams and carries on. She’s not allowed to do it at home why should she do it when we’re old. Call me old fashioned but my daughter is learning her manners and how to use them, including table manners when eating out.

good for you! it always is heartening to see well-mannered, well-spoken and intelligent children who behave appropriately and respectfully 🙂 more parents like that please

zorro29 said :

I know my response will bring on a barrage of complaint and snark, but I have an opinion too so here it is…

I am always surprised (and shocked) at the increasingly entitled attitude of parents. When I was young, we were seen and not heard – the kind of behaviour I see now would never have been allowed.

A friend of mine (who is otherwise very reasonable and intelligent) was out at dinner with my partner and I and brought her children. Her 2 year old son screamed down the place and ran around the restaurant (going up to other tables etc). Her response was “What people don’t realise is that he will be louder if left in his chair. If people don’t want to deal with children they should eat out later at night”

I thought this was ridiculous. People who don’t have children (or don’t want to put up with the poor behaviour of other children) must inconvenience themselves and eat very late so it’s not “family time”.

Parents need to take responsibility for their own children and recognise that there is reasonable behaviour for public spaces which involves minimising noise and running around (including in playgrounds). If they want to scream, let them do it in your OWN house so only you have to deal with it (and it’s not being inflicted on others who have no choice).

And your response just shows how ridiculous parents can be – very classy of you. The correct response was to calm your children down a little so they were still having fun but not being too disruptive.

But, of course, it’s always someone else’s fault hey? Never just poor behaviour and lack of discipline.

+1 I’m mortified if we’re out to dinner and my daughter screams and carries on. She’s not allowed to do it at home why should she do it when we’re old. Call me old fashioned but my daughter is learning her manners and how to use them, including table manners when eating out.

I allow my kids to enjoy themselves when playing in a public park, if that means screaming, yelling, whilst playing safely and not hurting themselves or other children, then they are doing nothing wrong.. They are young children FFS!

I would have told Ms Pretentious Stuck up Bi&tch to go F her self, in no uncertain terms…

Gerry

Certainly the fast food restaurants need to take some responsibility for the tiny, closed-in and echoey spaces they provide. However having spent some time in those spaces I have to say some children – particularly those in families or groups of 2 or more tend to be exceedingly noisy and dominate the playground. This does make it very difficult for younger and more anxious children.
Furthermore I have to wonder – given that the parent was driven to comment to you – that she was actually just being polite and what she was really saying was that your kids had taken over the playground and were possibly even behaving in a bullying fashion. Certainly I have to say this is very very common in those playgrounds because they are so small and kids in groups will feel a lot more confident and in control of the playground than those on their own. Just something to consider.

Zeital said :

If it is outdoors then that other parent needs to toughen the hell up. Its a playground, young kids are gonna be noisy when they are having fun. I would hate to think what ‘fun’ her kids are having if they are getting told all the time that they are too noisy in a outdoor setting…..

Good one! Honestly, what to parents expect in a feral setting like the McDonald’s playground? It ain’t no nursery.

Gerry, I think you did nothing wrong. The parent who complained was no doubt the parent of quite young children and hence had to endure the yelling and screaming while she was in the play area herself supervising her kids.

As a mum of primary school aged kids, I always let mine go in to that McDonald’s play area alone and who knows what they get up to? They are loud but I am sure they are pretty careful with little ones. Unfortunately, when your kids are young, you must choose: either keep them with you at your table (ie don’t let them into the play area) or you go in with them and put up with all the noise.

People should not expect children to adhere to an adult’s standard of acceptable noise levels.

Parents of young children are often critical of older children, because they are louder and more obnoxious than their little darling. I know I used to be. I used to think ‘wouldn’t it be nice if those big kids would bugger off there is no risk of my little boy being knocked over’. Ain’t gonna happen, Mums and Dads.

I know my response will bring on a barrage of complaint and snark, but I have an opinion too so here it is…

I am always surprised (and shocked) at the increasingly entitled attitude of parents. When I was young, we were seen and not heard – the kind of behaviour I see now would never have been allowed.

A friend of mine (who is otherwise very reasonable and intelligent) was out at dinner with my partner and I and brought her children. Her 2 year old son screamed down the place and ran around the restaurant (going up to other tables etc). Her response was “What people don’t realise is that he will be louder if left in his chair. If people don’t want to deal with children they should eat out later at night”

I thought this was ridiculous. People who don’t have children (or don’t want to put up with the poor behaviour of other children) must inconvenience themselves and eat very late so it’s not “family time”.

Parents need to take responsibility for their own children and recognise that there is reasonable behaviour for public spaces which involves minimising noise and running around (including in playgrounds). If they want to scream, let them do it in your OWN house so only you have to deal with it (and it’s not being inflicted on others who have no choice).

And your response just shows how ridiculous parents can be – very classy of you. The correct response was to calm your children down a little so they were still having fun but not being too disruptive.

But, of course, it’s always someone else’s fault hey? Never just poor behaviour and lack of discipline.

If it is outdoors then that other parent needs to toughen the hell up. Its a playground, young kids are gonna be noisy when they are having fun. I would hate to think what ‘fun’ her kids are having if they are getting told all the time that they are too noisy in a outdoor setting…..

Hi Gerry, in short: Yes.
You were out of line .
The worst part was your response and attitude.

A kids playground is for kids to let loose, have fun and burn off some energy. But it doesn’t mean that all bets are off, and they can run amok and disturb everyone in the playground and around it.
And if you are talking about the McDonalds /Hungry Jacks playgrounds then even more so. It is so frustrating when parents open the door to those playgrounds , push their tittle terrors in, and forget about them for 20 minutes while everyone else around them have to suffer their overbearing behavior for the duration of their stay.

Long story short: teach your kids to act with respect for others around them: that includes the other kids on the playground, and in this case also the others surrounding it. And YOU need to follow that up by respecting those around it too.
If your kids are becoming so unruly that strangers are complaining you need to take them out into a field/oval away from others and get then to burn off their excess energy. And then stop feeding them high sugar or caffiene or high preservative foods (which they are no doubt having if eating fast food – most kids can’t handle it so don’t feel ashamed)

Finally, take this as a lesson to look around you & notice what other impacts you and your family are having on those around you. And make sure the positive impacts far outweigh the negative .

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you were at Maccas? When you go there or to any of the other fine fast food establishments that target young families you expect noise/mess/tantrums etc. Not sure what alternate universe she stumbled in from but I’d say you were well within her rights to call her on her rudeness.

Firstly, here’s my résumé as record of my at least part qualification to speak on this subject – I have one five year old boy who whilst not noisy himself is like any other active, rambunctious kid.

Secondly…I hear where you are coming from. Children should be allowed to laugh, scream, shout in a playground specifically built for for them.

However, it may have looked as if you were letting them be the dominant force in the playground, if you see what I mean. I hate those enclosed plastic play areas in fast food joints because there are always kids whose parents bring them there so they can be ‘hands off’ for a while. That to me is not the exact purpose of them. It’s annoying in any play area when some kids dominate the space and make younger ones feel they can’t use the equipment as they would like. Not saying that your kids were doing that though.

Thirdly, your bigger crime might have been feeding your kids that food for lunch.