'I can't live without her', boy said when allegedly abusive teacher arrested

CONTENT WARNING: This article refers to alleged child abuse.

When a 15-year-old boy found out a teacher had been arrested for alleging having a sexually inappropriate relationship with him, he told his mother, “I can’t live without her”, jurors heard.

The teacher is currently facing an ACT Supreme Court trial, accused of having a sexual and romantic relationship with the boy, which began after the then-24-year-old met him at his school in late 2020.

She left that school and started work at another, but the pair allegedly started talking on social media after he sent her a message.

While she did eventually send him revealing photos and money, and spent time with him, she believed he was 16, her defence lawyers said when her trial started earlier this week.

Jurors heard the boy reportedly went on to show explicit photos or videos of her to his then-girlfriend, friend and brother.

On Friday (20 September), the boy’s mother told jurors she first heard about the teacher when police approached her with the allegations in 2022.

When she asked the boy about her, she said, “He just kept stating, ‘No, we’re just friends, she’s just a mentor”’.

She said when the teacher was arrested that year, the boy was “absolutely devastated” and “inconsolable”.

He told her, “I need her, Mum; Mum, I can’t live without her”, and was “basically blaming himself for showing his mates what she sent”, the mother said.

The boy’s father also said he didn’t know about the teacher until police arrived at their home. He talked to the boy, who at first told him, “There’s nothing going on, they were just friends”.

However, when they kept talking later, the boy started crying.

“He felt bad, needed her, ‘What am I going to do without her’ sort of attitude,” the father said.

“He was extremely upset at the time … he blamed himself so I kept reassuring him, saying, ‘You were just a child’.”

When the teacher was arrested, the father said the boy was upset and told him “that he’s destroyed this lady’s life by his actions”.

The mother also talked about an incident in 2021 when she found marijuana and a marijuana pipe in a box under the boy’s bed while cleaning his room. She also found a receipt from a sex shop in Canberra for such a pipe, so she called the shop.

“I was pretty angry, I wanted them to explain how a pipe made it into my house through a 15-year-old child,” she said.

She asked a staff member from the sex shop to look at security camera footage of whoever purchased the pipe. The staff member did so, then called back to say there was “a lady” who bought a pipe at the time listed on the receipt.

The mother then confronted the boy about the pipe, but he claimed his friend’s sister bought it.

“He was basically like, ‘Shut up, don’t talk to me about it’. I left it at that,” she said.

During the mother’s cross-examination, the teacher’s barrister, Sam Pararajasingham, suggested that when she confronted the boy, he told her, “[the teacher’s first name] got this pipe for me”. The mother denied this.

The boy’s then-girlfriend also returned to continue to testify on Friday, saying their relationship started in 2020 before it ended in late 2021.

Under cross-examination from Mr Pararajasingham, the girlfriend accepted she believed the teacher played a role in the end of their relationship at the time, which she had been hurt by and blamed the teacher for it.

The teacher has pleaded not guilty to single counts of the persistent sexual abuse of a child, making pornographic material available to a young person and supplying cannabis to a young person, as well as two counts each of grooming and committing an act of indecency.

The trial continues before Acting Justice John Burns.

If this story has raised any concerns for you, 1800RESPECT, the national 24-hour sexual assault, family and domestic violence counselling line, can be contacted on 1800 737 732. Help and support are also available through the Canberra Rape Crisis Centre on 02 6247 2525, the Domestic Violence Crisis Service ACT on (02) 6280 0900, the Sexual Violence Legal Services on 6257 4377 and Lifeline on 13 11 14. In an emergency, call triple zero.