Guess the cars… Photos: James Coleman.
Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hands together for Region‘s Car of the Year for 2024 – the MG 3.
Just kidding.
Not only was last year’s pick of the bunch its fully-electric sibling, the MG 4 – and it’d start to look very dodgy if MG won for a second year running – but I’ve also been banned from reviewing any more MG products after what I said about its latest little hybrid hatchback.
It turns out that “the interior smells like the inside of a balloon” gets you straight on the naughty list. My apologies.
So, moving on.
The Abarth 500e parked on the beach near Cronulla, NSW.
Other cars that won’t be winning the award include the electric Abarth 500e, which I loved deeply for its jelly-bean looks and raucous fake exhaust noise that was actually very well done, but less so its useless range of 253 km and price tag of $60K.
Nor will it be the Tesla Model 3, which was cool once but is now just annoying in its pursuit of minimalism (indicators belong on stalks, no argument). The Volvo EX30 also has a button on the touchscreen for the glovebox, which is an instant write-off in my books.
The Toyota LandCruiser 70 would be likeable in a old-school, hillbilly way, if it cost about $50K less.
And despite two attempts to love the Alfa Romeo Tonale PHEV over the course of the year, it still left me underwhelmed by its vague steering and crunchy drivetrain.
The puppy-eyed Suzuki Jimny XL had me similarly torn, but it really does need some extra oomph as a four-door. And even with a plug-in hybrid drivetrain, the Mercedes-AMG C63 S is still a mighty machine, but it’s no V8 (you press the start button and there’s no noise – that seems wrong).
Others were simpler decisions.
The Mazda 6 is just getting too old, perhaps not surprisingly after 12 years and four updates. The Toyota CH-R doesn’t deliver on the sporty promises its styling makes, but buy the ‘GR Sport’ version before the Lexus LBX. The Genesis G70 Shooting Brake also looked better than it drove. The Hyundai Kona performed on neither front remarkably. The Mercedes-Benz E300 just wasn’t polished enough.
The Mazda 6 wagon at the entrance to Kurri Kurri, near Newcastle.
And Toyota’s late entrance to the EV party, the bZ4X, doesn’t really have anything going for it apart from the fact it’s a … well, Toyota. People will also think you’ve bought a computer hard drive when you mention the name at parties and you’ll end up dying old and alone.
The easy pick for COTY would the Lotus Emira, which I unashamedly described as the “best car I’ve ever driven, hands down”. Or the Mazda MX-5, which – around town at least – is almost the same thing for nearly one-fifth of the price.
They’re hardly what the company’s founder would call a Lotus without feeling a bit faint, but the new EVs from Lotus – the Eletre SUV and Emeya sedan – would baffle even Isambard Brunel by how well they manage to cloak their immense weight behind pin-sharp handling.
The Lotus Eletre S in Ainslie Place, Civic.
The Ford Mustang Mach-E would be the same, if only they could have come up with another name. Please never call that thing a Mustang.
Or there’s the Audi RS6 Avant, which every car enthusiast must adore by law.
The Hyundai i30 N is in a similar boat. And I see Wheels magazine has just handed its COTY award to its electric sibling, the Hyundai IONIQ 5 N. Worthy, and I love it for all it has done for EVs. But it also costs $110,000, so you’d want it to.
The new electric MINI Cooper was also hilariously good fun, similar to the BMW iX2, but prettier. See also the MINI Countryman.
The MINI Cooper goes to Floriade.
And the Renault Megane E-Tech, while not looking like any other Megane we’ve ever seen up to this point, definitely cheered me up after what’d we’d seen from the French at the Olympics.
Then there was the Chevrolet Silverado, which was so needlessly excessive I loved it. I can still hear that V8 roar if I close my eyes.
Others diligently fulfil their briefs like the quiet kid at the back of the class. The Kia Picanto. The Subaru Impreza. The Toyota Camry, once you ignore the dull interior. You could live happily ever after in any of these.
The Toyota Camry pretending to be an Uber outside Hotel Realm.
The Mitsubishi Triton is a serious contender, now that the company has issued a fix for the driver-monitoring system that would yell at you whenever you looked out the side window at an intersection for too long – you know, good driving things.
Or there’s the Land Rover Defender 130, once you get used to the enormous back end. And have the wallet to stomach the cost of options.
And honestly, while we’re on big things, GWM’s Tank 300 and Cannon Alpha showed how far the Chinese really have come. I mean, the latter has a clock in the dashboard – an actual analogue clock.
The GWM Cannon Alpha on a fire trail near the Cotter.
We could heap similar praise on the Chery Tiggo 8 Pro Max, and to a lesser extent, the LDV Mifa van (which looks like a cut-price Lexus).
I’m so close to handing the award to the Hyundai Sante Fe. Or even the Kia EV9, with the proviso you must buy it in matt blue. The CX-90, Mazda’s first serious attempt at going upmarket, is also enough to have a passer-by mistake it for a BMW.
The Kia EV9 at the Kingston Foreshore.
But there is one that impressed me the most.
Try not to think about the name, and just look at it. Or close its doors, and listen to the solid thud they make. Or sit back in its quilted leather seats and admire the crystalline trimmings. And know it all cost you the same as a Tesla (with added indicator stalk).
Ladies and gentlemen, you really can put your hands together this time. The BYD Seal is Region‘s Car of the Year for 2024.
A pre-production version of the BYD Seal in the Canberra Centre.
What cars should we try out next year? Let us know in the comments.
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