That sentence seems so American doesn’t it? 7 years ago when I started dating it was something that was never really questioned. The chances of someone seeing two people at once seemed very slim; it was a question that never needed asking.
Now with the rise of online dating it’s become a very important and necessary question. Chances are when you’re on a dating site or app, you’re talking to more than one person. You are getting to know several people at a time and chances are you end up meeting two or more in person around the same time as well.
You might find that you like two people, two really nice people you want to get to know better before deciding who you like best. Yes this might sound cruel essentially pitting two people against each other (without their knowledge), but isn’t life made up of choices? Choices as to what is best for you either at the time or for the future? This is just another one of those choices.
So when is the right time to ask? And is honesty the best policy here?
And if someone happens to be dating you and someone else at the same time do you have a right to be angry or annoyed?
Personally I have no idea. To me this is such a grey area of dating that unless there are real feelings there I don’t think it even warrants asking the question.
For me I’d only ask about exclusivity if I actually wanted to be exclusive and that the chances seemed good that they’d respond with the same want. Typically this might not be in the first week or two, but something more saved a month or so in. Of course this is dependent in each individual relationship.
But it is necessary – while we might not want to admit that this is how dating is – well this is how dating is. It’s getting to know several people at once (obviously not everyone may be like this) and it’s about getting to the point of knowing someone that they’re the only person you want to know.
The important thing is to pick your moment.