New cryptic road safety signs

http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x140/lemdam/signs/?action=view&current=39rudesign.jpg

http://s91.photobucket.com/albums/k298/tilltoo0/?action=view&current=1.jpg

http://s4.photobucket.com/albums/y142/mferrar/signs/?action=view&current=ha.jpg

” I fish/shoot/bash the missus/drive a four-wheel drive, and I vote”?

The bushfire affected area – please drive slowly ones crack me, as if my velocity over tarseal road is going to affect ANYTHING at all.

How about “If you can read this sign, you don’t need glasses” in a rapidly decreasing font size?

There are still quite a few of the “Fire Ban Sign” signs around… What purpose do they actually serve?

I get out at write my autograph on those signs. It looks like one of those pieces of graff art (tags).

I like the signs that say ‘sign’.

How about an advertisment for porn in Fyshwick – ‘Canberra, the Bush Capital’

How about a sign with “Stanhope delivers another breakthrough! (sarcasm intended)”

There is a ‘Federally Funded Blackspot Project’ sign on the road just outside of Hopevale, an Aboriginal community in far north QLD. Oh, the irony… I used to laugh every time I drove past it.

Federally funded black spot project.

Personally, I hope not justbands. Though it might help the people who speed cause they think they are going to a nice place called heaven 😛

How about “drink driving means you might have to stop being a Minister for about five minutes”.

Speaking of crazy driving. I had an interesting drive in belco the other day and entered some sort of giant race track where the winner gets the best position at the next traffic light cue.

(Seems to be all about ‘random lane swapping’ on those roads rather than ‘overtaking’. Crazy children.)

> Being quite a Christian country…

We are?

Being quite a Christian country…

“God sends speeders to Hell”

Hume in Victoria – Drowsy Drivers Die

Yoda gift to Howdy give.

Howdy writes signs like Yoda speaks!

Need more signs:

“ahead metres 20 look must you”

lane
one
form

actually reads ‘form one lane’…

I presume this is designed for the convenience of drivers with acute myopia who cannot read a 50-cm font 20 metres ahead? Great, I feel so much safer now!

Of course, UB is not one word!
I think you just hit the nail on the head : )

I bet they were really proud of how clever they thought their sign was too….

Should be “DRV N TXT U B NXT”. “Drive n text UB Next” makes no sense. Why would U & B not be spaced apart?

Whoever thought up the signs is probably one of these ~60 year old, “Why won’t he just reire already” permanent employees they store in a cupboard and only let out when its unavoidable.

They’re mixing txt speech with common language (Why use “UB” but not change ‘text’ to ‘txt’?”) and also capitalising verbs for no good reason.

Also, its neither
1) (re: Speeding) speed that kills nor speeding that hurts, but the sudden impacts.
2) (re: Drink driving) Its legal to drink and then drive, but to exceed the legal limit is the crime.

Further evidence Hargreaves is out of touch. Personally I hope for a spectacular election loss for him come October, and a blight unto the seventh generation for his line.

When I see a sign about txt messaging I normally go ‘ oh that’s right I just got a msg I haven’t read yet…’

I think they should put a sign up about “distraction” just down the road from the txt one saying – ‘If you know what that last sign said you took your eyes off the road for too long’.

And then there would be a speed camera further up and a sign saying – ‘speeding? pay attention to the speed limit’

I say exploit the pinkie, all else will fail.

Another ingenious sign would be ‘if you are still in the right lane since the parliamentary triangle, you are an inadequate driver’ at the Woden roundabout.

Speeding Hurts? I have never noticed, actually, I reckon it makes me feel good, like a big man!

How completely ridiculous and lame is “Speeding Hurts”. It would be like putting a warning on a pack of cigarettes say “Smoking may cause a tingling sensation in the back of your throat that could be cancer but might just be the beginnings of a cold, go for it Tiget, it’s worth the risk”.

“and LOL VYBerlinaV8.. there should be one followed soon after saying “STOP TAILGATING ME DICKHEAD, I’M ALREADY DOING 15KMS OVER THE SPEED LIMIT” for the morons who do when you can’t possibly change lanes. some of us do value their lives just a bit lol”

Love it!

Saw one of the “Drive n text UB Next” signs being installed on Northbourne this morning, going south just before Fenner Hall. Amusingly it was difficult to see because of an overhanging tree covering it…

I always thought that was S4anta’s handiwork.

I must admit, Mr Evil will assuredly agree, I do miss the witty political statements graffiti’d on the side of a road somewhere as you are driving around New Zealand. In this solo instance, I did find the graffiti funny.

ramblingtd – stop reading it like its starwars script, and read it as your car would encounter it.

lane
one
form

actually reads ‘form one lane’…

Alternatively, everytime you drive over it, start humming the starwars tune and yoda speak it ‘Lane one form, you must’.

The text one distracted me for a minute because they seem to be using part english/ part text speak. So I was trying to read it in text speak first.

All I really see in it is that it is a good message to spread. But it won’t affect very many people, if any at all

It’s not just canberrans who don’t read signs.

See, if we had an effective light rail system none of these signs would be required…

For all those buggers taking the southward “shortcut” you mention, I can’t wait until the first day southbound traffic is directed through the new road – they’ll all discover that the old temporary way south is now blocked, and they’ll have to continue on to the city 🙂

“Don’t slow to 60km/h for a speed camera in an 80km/h zone”

I like the “No lines marked, don’t overtake unless safe” signs after roads are resurfaced. It always implied to me that if lines were marked, you can overtake whenever…

“Aggressive drivers are wankers”?
“Tailgaters Suck”?

Again an utter waste of our money, at least if they were going to waste the money on this useless crap they could have done better than getting some 50 year old sitting in an office to attempt writing a sign in so called “text speak”.

The government should realise by now nobody in canberra pays attention to signs beside the road.. speed limits, give way, stop, form one lane, keep left unless overtaking signs mean nothing except I will do the exact opposite. But in the interests of safe driving the government instead of hiring another more police with the funds they spend it on these signs that wouldn’t make any difference even if they were flashing and dancing around.

and LOL VYBerlinaV8.. there should be one followed soon after saying “STOP TAILGATING ME DICKHEAD, I’M ALREADY DOING 15KMS OVER THE SPEED LIMIT” for the morons who do when you can’t possibly change lanes. some of us do value their lives just a bit lol

What about the campaign on ACTION buses a while ago that said “Take your eyes off the road”. I did, but to this day I still don’t know what the ad was about.

I really don’t understand the dashed line designating a “slip lane” on a left hand turn. So I used to have right of way, and now if I want right of way I have to fail to indicate?

Am I the only person having a problem with this?

still mystified by the “Lane One Form” requirements when merging…

or one that says stay left unless overtaking, it’s the law!!!!

PL,

What sort of comments do you get from these turkeys when you ask why they are breaking the law?

Seatbelts are as by far the single greatest silver bullet in reducing road trauma.

How has this message been so mangled that dimwits can ‘misinterpret’ the positives?

I can see it now..

Feeling sleepy?
Become soylent green

You would be surprised how many people DONT wear their seatbelts. It really staggers me how much I notice it when you are out actually looking for it.

And what’s with the signs they put on the cycleways. First they make them so small and then they stick them up so high where no cyclist paying attention to the road would ever see them.

Those driver fatigue signs in Victoria are the worst. Every five minutes you see a sign that mentions sleep. Even if you weren’t drowsy, the power of suggestion is enough to make you want to doze off.

The best ones are the ones in Victoria,

DROOPY EYES?
POWERNAP NOW.

Like……right, now? While I’m driving? Don’t want to disobey a road sign…..

What a joke. Would be great if they could put up some signs that actually make some sense!

Lunatics running the asylum.

The ACT Government shouldn’t be encouraging this degenerate and semi-literate use of the English language – appalling!

Mind you, most of these young people are probably products of the Stanhope education system.

They need signs at the Glenloch interchange where you are heading north onto Caswell Drive. A good sign would be: “Left Lane to Belco, Right Lane to City – Choose the correct lane and don’t be a wanker”

or how about a sign for the people who shortcut the southbound trip to Woden on the GDE by taking the City exit and cutting across four lanes. Something like: “The lines are unbroken for a reason – fuckwit!”

I saw one of the new signs on Gundaroo drive something along the lines of “Wear your Seatbelt”. Nice advice but last time I checked, this wasn’t the USA and everybody already does wear a seatbelt. I do not know a single person who doesn’t wear one. Pointless.

The cryptic one on the Parkway is the lamest attempt at txt speech I have ever seen. I thought they were trying to reference a UB40 song.

what is the psychology behind these signs? have they shown that rhyming signs like this actually have an impact on the road toll?

ffs, the nanny state strikes again

can someone please publish the name of the dunderhead moonbat that thought up the txt speak sign – how many accidents will that cause as people are distracted scratching their heads “wtf is that!”

that’s even beyond the stupidity level of the guzzling lunchman

Yeah the system time is out of nack.

Anyway, what was this post about? Oh that. Okay. Wow.

How about the sign that says “GET OUT OF THE RIGHT HAND LANE, DICKHEAD”

Oh, by the way – RiotACT’s server clock is out of synch – I’m hitting the “post” button on this entry at 5.12pm.

Pull ur bong to crz along

A relaxing road users initiative of the greens perhaps ?

I think the government should let us concentrate on the goddamned road, instead of spending several seconds (as I did) trying to figure out what that TXT sign actually meant.

Of course, travelling at 100km/h down the parkway, those several seconds equated to about 200 meters of inattention.

On the plus side, at least I know to ignore it now.

Utterly ridiculous. They already ignore the speed limit signs, so how is this any different?

Oh and for seat belts – a stick figure flying through a car window.

Just put up signs of a hand wagging it’s little pinky finger at you…