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Monopoly busting Hargreaves takes on Norwood Park

By johnboy - 7 May 2007 22

It has been noted that the only obstacle to sensible, low cost cardboard coffins for cremation has been Norwood Park crematorium which profits mightily by clipping the tickets of all Canberrans seeking cremation as they pass into the hereafter.

The Canberra Times has the good news that John Hargreaves has let it be known that he’s planning to introduce a second crematorium, possibly in Tuggeranong, to bring some much needed competition to this essential service.

Mr Hargreaves said opening a second crematorium would improve standards, services and presentation. Prices should stabilise or come down.

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22 Responses to
Monopoly busting Hargreaves takes on Norwood Park
VicePope 7:17 pm 07 May 07

More hot air to keep Hargreaves on the grave-y train, je pense. Or perhaps, like the pollie he is, and facing the eternal fires as he no doubt will, he wants us all to share his pain, even if we’re dead when we do the sharing.

One of my many fantasies is that, upon croaking (which I shall do, at some point) my corpse shall be burnt to ashes, those ashes crushed powder small and that small heap placed in a container, ideally one constructed for the original purpose of bearing food of Asian origin from the place of purchase to that of consumption. The container will be handed to a trusted minion, ideally a 2.1m, 130k Pacific Islander of frightening appearance. This minion will go whence gather any of mine enemies or any other despised people, and blow some ash in their faces.

Ari 6:18 pm 07 May 07

Well Riot-ACT does have a reputation for digging up all sorts of dirt around town, but I reckon this posting is just a rotten idea.

Stick to the underground music scene, I say.

VicePope 5:02 pm 07 May 07

Hearses for curses? It cinder public interest, ash far ash I can see.

jenna 4:51 pm 07 May 07

LOLRAOTFHMS!

Ari 4:19 pm 07 May 07

Enough jokes everyone, it’s a grave situation.

jenna 4:13 pm 07 May 07

Not for those of us who seem to follow hearses out there with monotonous regualarity. Ah, but for the dearly departed, you are correct! And they’re beyond caring.

Nik_the_Pig 4:05 pm 07 May 07

But Jenna, it’s a once in a life time trip.

jenna 2:24 pm 07 May 07

Woden is already nearly full, and I hear they are beginning to re-use some of the really old graves due to lack of space. Don’t know how true it is.

Seeing as Tuggeranong people have had to travel all the way to Mitchell for so long, how can we discriminate against them by denying them a service more accessible? Forrest is probably not feasible either due to lack of space, although I like the proximity to Parliament House. They could probably harness all that hot air to keep the furnaces going!

VicePope 2:18 pm 07 May 07

Where there’s smoke …..
But, if everyone gets burned up, who will be left to know where the bodies are buried?

cranky 2:00 pm 07 May 07

First sensible thing this joker has done in years.

For his next trick, perhaps he could do the same for third party vehicle insurance?

astrojax 1:53 pm 07 May 07

aww vicepope, you kill us!

this is an issue the opposition won’t bury.

surely, really, some legislation will overcome norwood’s obstinancy – just make it unlawful for them to discriminate on the basis of the manufacture of the coffin. then it’s a dead issue…

VicePope 1:43 pm 07 May 07

Is this just another random thing for Hargreaves to say or is it a burning commitment?

bonfire 1:07 pm 07 May 07

we should use post hole diggers to dig graves, then use cardboard cylinders for coffins.

we could use the ones they use for cement forms.

less room, more efficient, cheaper.

Pandy 12:44 pm 07 May 07

Why Tuggeranong? It proabably menas Hume, and who wants to go to a funeral there? Build it at the Cemetry at Woden, there must be a some land left there that is suitable. Alternatively build it closer in to the city like at Forrest.

jenna 12:01 pm 07 May 07

Monopolies are no good for the consumer, they only benefit the operator. And here is a prime example of such an operator standing in the way of environmentally friendly cardboard coffins which have been approved by the government, no doubt after extensive research and debate. Does the operator of Norwood Park have a vested interest in the sale of over-priced timber coffins? It is time for a second crematorium and cemetery, preferably on the southside to end this inequity.

As a side issue, in response to a comment in the last couple of weeks about “silver” handles being removed and resold, this is ridiculous, as they are simply silver coloured combustible plastic! No resale value at all!

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