Smelly Taxi Drivers in Canberra

Skyring said :

I bought an air freshener at the airport Caltex, opened it and tucked the little yellow pinetree up behind the security camera, and my next passenger was so overwhelmed by the smell of vanilla she wound the window down.

I can go along with that. Those horrible chemical scents and “deodorants” make me gag. Give me BO any day.

“…but in the last month almost every time I have got into a taxi I have been met with an overwhelmingly powerful stench of body odour…”

Have you had a shower in the last month?

georgesgenitals said :

I once got into a taxi in the city and it stank so bad, I thought the driver must have s*** his pants. I said “hey, you s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. Then a bit later I said “you DID s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. A bit later I said “you DEFINITELY shat yourself”. He replied “I DEFINITELY did not”. So I said “pull them down and show me”. He pulled over, and dropped his strides and there was a long, streaky grogan smeared down the inside of the pants, all over his undies and all over his leg. I said “Ha – I TOLD YOU you shat yourself”, and he replied “bullcrap, it was in there when I found them”.

True story.

I almost peed my pants at this story. You are one funny dude!

Many cabbies are of non-Anglo ethnicity and their diet produces a different body odour. Presumably they are distressed by the odour of people who routinely munch Maccas. Your nose gets accustomed to certain smells and you don’t notice what others find offensive. Heavy smokers don’t appreciate how much they stink, for example.

But strong body odours are definitely out for cabbies. The cab and cabbie should be clean and tidy, comfortable in every way. If a passenger finds a taxi rank, they should lodge a complaint.

(Ahem, little bit of cabbie humour there.)

Passengers can pong remarkably. You might think that after throwing up in the gents at Mooseheads, a bit of cold water and paper towel will fix you up good as new and attractive to the masses, but this is not the case.

Occasionally I’ve had to discreetly crank up the ventilation.

And sometimes the passengers do it to me. I bought an air freshener at the airport Caltex, opened it and tucked the little yellow pinetree up behind the security camera, and my next passenger was so overwhelmed by the smell of vanilla she wound the window down.

Road Transport (Public Passenger Services) Regulation 2002

120 Dress and conduct of taxi drivers
(1) This section applies to the driver of a vehicle while it is operating as a taxi.
(2) The driver must be clean and tidy.

Maximum penalty: 5 penalty units.

Two of my relatives owned taxis for a few years.

A spray freshener was used after passengers exited that either did not wear deodorant thru life or were overweight and did not shower or bath regularly and chain smokers with smelly clothes.

If I were a single male cabbie, in his thirties or forties seeking love, using Paco Raban as a deodorant or body spray is definitely the way to go!!

When I inhale THAT heavenly scent on a man……….

bd84 said :

So do any taxi drivers out there have an excellent story about them having to drive a smelly passenger to a destination??

I do have one, although I’m kind of reluctant to give it up. But, since I’m out of the game now…

I had a call at change of shift to take a passenger from Watson to Belconnen. Pulled up at the house and noticed a taxi in the driveway, lights off. My passenger was the driver, who had finished his shift and had dropped the vehicle off in Watson either because the owner lived there, or the next driver was going to pick it up from that address.

He was anglo, about mid 30s, and quiet, didn’t chat much – and he was RANK- just BO, pure and simple! I kept my window down for the whole trip and gave my leather seats a quick wipe over when he got out. All I could think about was what his own vehicle (a regular Ford with cloth seats) must have smelt like after his shift, and what it must have been like for passengers. I know that especially in summer a long shift leaves you wrung out and smelly, but this was of a supremely higher plane. Appalling.

The worst-smelling passengers outnumber smelly cabbies I reckon – girls covered in their own vomit of cheap sugary alcoholic drinks, boys who’ve downed 18 schooners and pissed their pants. I never had anyone shit in my cab, but it’s not unheard of.

But even if passengers stink, while it’s not pleasant it’s their money that’s paying you, and you’ll be shot of them in 20 minutes or less, mostly. Cabbies who stink should be removed, period.

So do any taxi drivers out there have an excellent story about them having to drive a smelly passenger to a destination??

georgesgenitals said :

I once got into a taxi in the city and it stank so bad, I thought the driver must have s*** his pants. I said “hey, you s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. Then a bit later I said “you DID s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. A bit later I said “you DEFINITELY shat yourself”. He replied “I DEFINITELY did not”. So I said “pull them down and show me”. He pulled over, and dropped his strides and there was a long, streaky grogan smeared down the inside of the pants, all over his undies and all over his leg. I said “Ha – I TOLD YOU you shat yourself”, and he replied “bullcrap, it was in there when I found them”.

True story.

omg surely you jest!!

ConanOfCooma said :

“freezing conditions”?

Are you serious? It’s not even winter, we haven’t had a sub 0 night yet (have we even had 0?), and you are whining about “freezing”? That makes you a whingebag.

+1 Soon as I read the word ‘freezing’, my empathy monitor flatlined.

I once got into a taxi in the city and it stank so bad, I thought the driver must have s*** his pants. I said “hey, you s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. Then a bit later I said “you DID s*** your pants”, to which he replied “no I didn’t”. A bit later I said “you DEFINITELY shat yourself”. He replied “I DEFINITELY did not”. So I said “pull them down and show me”. He pulled over, and dropped his strides and there was a long, streaky grogan smeared down the inside of the pants, all over his undies and all over his leg. I said “Ha – I TOLD YOU you shat yourself”, and he replied “bullcrap, it was in there when I found them”.

True story.

Considering most taxi drivers in Canberra njow days seem to have originated on the sub-continent it is not surprising, simply because BO basher doesn’t mask nor eliminate the smell of curry coming out of the pores of said humans.

ConanOfCooma said :

“freezing conditions”?

Are you serious? It’s not even winter, we haven’t had a sub 0 night yet (have we even had 0?), and you are whining about “freezing”? That makes you a whingebag.

The official minimum for Canberra last Saturday was -1.1, and Sunday was -0.3.

That makes you a wrongbag.

“freezing conditions”?

Are you serious? It’s not even winter, we haven’t had a sub 0 night yet (have we even had 0?), and you are whining about “freezing”? That makes you a whingebag.

How about you sit in a car for a days work, and see how you smell! Sure, some of these drivers could be more considerate, but if that was the case, I would hope it would apply to obeying the road rules over personal odour removal.

Yes you are correct, not only do they smell they don’t know where they are going and talk crap 99% of the time (that is if they are not on their mobile talking crap in a foreign language)…

Taxi drivers here in Canberra need a bloody good kick in the arse !!

We caught a taxi to Warehouse yesterday, and the driver had shocking BO. He had his window down and his arm out the window. I was sitting directly behind him and had to request he put the window up as the wind was making the smell blow right into my face. Our taxi driver on the way back didn’t smell though. A much more enjoyable trip!