What to do when an idiot is up your tail and honking?

johnboy 16 October 2008 42

So as I was crossing a road in Civic this morning I noticed a scene.

A block up a truck was trying to turn right and the traffic had tailed back. A taxi was sticking slightly out into the intersection so there was no more room.

A silver sedan driven by a rather stylish lady had done the right thing and not entered the intersection until she could cross it.

Behind her, another women (much less stylish) in a black car was banging away aggressively on her horn in frustration that the silver car in front was not moving despite the green light.

This went on for some time and the stylish lady resisted the temptation to either; get out and remodel the black car with a wheel lock, or to try and change lanes across the intersection to get away from the angry honking behind.

So here’s the question… Is there any series of gestures with which one can inform an idiot behind that the intersection is blocked?

Or do we just have to turn up the stereo and ignore them?


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42 Responses to What to do when an idiot is up your tail and honking?
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Granny Granny 1:05 pm 18 Oct 08

Danman said :

Gunghalin has been around for at least 13 years ant… time to update ye olde colonial mappe

That goes for anyone else too

Ye olde colonial map … I love it!

*chuckle*

I actually think the map was the least of the old girl’s problems given that she was parked at a green traffic light.

johnboy johnboy 12:34 pm 18 Oct 08

Given the current generation of street directories are probably the last that will be made (GPS in mobile phones to be standard very soon) it might be worth picking up a couple for their collectors value.

Danman Danman 12:31 pm 18 Oct 08

Gunghalin has been around for at least 13 years ant… time to update ye olde colonial mappe

That goes for anyone else too

ant ant 11:54 am 18 Oct 08

The trouble with some maps is, Gunghalin’s not on it. Well, the word is, but it’s a paddock. My map is that sort of map. I imagine the oldies had an old map too, which didn’t work in Gunghalin.

Granny Granny 10:21 am 18 Oct 08

The funniest thing I saw was at the lights outside the Gungahlin marketplace coming home around 6pm one night.

It was winter and still dark and the light was green, but the car in front didn’t move. It just sat there for ages, through several light changes.

The traffic kept banking up behind me, and I had just completed my first aid course so I thought, “Omigosh, the driver may have had a heart attack or topped themselves like in the Beatles song,” so I very bravely got out and knocked on the window.

There were two cute little older people sitting there, quite refined, and the lady was driving.

“Oh hello,” she said, “Can you direct me to that street with the same name as the Governor-General?”

I figured that she meant Hollingsworth St, and while I had been there before I am fairly directionally challenged myself and had no idea how to direct her from the current location.

She went on to explain, at length, about the function they were supposed to attend and how many hours they’d been driving around Gungahlin.

“Um, do you have a map? There’s a carpark just over there which might be a better spot for you to pull over and have a look,” I suggested over the honking of the other cars.

“Oh, yes, thankyou very much,” she replied and I made my way back to my own vehicle carefully avoiding the traffic who had decided that there was nothing to see here and were busily whizzing around us.

She putted off uncertainly, and I did later wonder if she ever made it to her party or even made it out of Gungahlin. I probably should have done more, but it was all quite unexpected really.

Davo111 Davo111 1:54 am 18 Oct 08

astrojax said :

but the last two lines don’t rhyme…

It should be in caps, anything in caps makes sense right?

Adza Adza 1:25 am 18 Oct 08

canberra towie said :

Vic Bitterman said :

I popped my car into reverse and slowly went backwards until I made contact with the front of his car. A gentle touch, but I saw it rocked his car. Note, I have a tow bar. I then selected first and rolled forwards 50cm or so.

PMSL good job

that might work if you have a big 4wd hilux but might not be as affective in say a patrol !!

PMSL x 2

canberra towie canberra towie 8:51 pm 17 Oct 08

Vic Bitterman said :

I popped my car into reverse and slowly went backwards until I made contact with the front of his car. A gentle touch, but I saw it rocked his car. Note, I have a tow bar. I then selected first and rolled forwards 50cm or so.

PMSL good job that might work if you have a big 4wd hilux but might not be as affective in say a patrol !!

p1 p1 4:21 pm 17 Oct 08

What really scares me is when the frangipani are arranged in a southern cross.

I haven’t seen that yet. When I do I will make the sign of a cross and throw a black cat over my shoulder to ward off evil…

johnboy johnboy 3:47 pm 17 Oct 08

What really scares me is when the frangipani are arranged in a southern cross.

That’s just evil squared.

VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy 3:46 pm 17 Oct 08

Love your work, bitterman, exactly the kind of thing I’d do.

I also agree re the stupid moles in cars with flowers with big sunnies.

Madman Madman 3:26 pm 17 Oct 08

This same scenario happened to me this morning on my motorbike.

I was trying to turn right without entering the intersection till a suitable time as the cars on the other side of the lights were green and going straight ahead blocking me from going.

And I swear to god, I was so close to dismounting my bike and holding everyone up even more to see what the idiots problem was. Tell you what, here’s a warning for anyone going to do that to me again next time – I will rip your friggin horn out of your car and place it somewhere I deem it would do better use.

PsydFX PsydFX 2:51 pm 17 Oct 08

I think in that situation I would have reversed just enough to stop the car behind from easily travelling around me, and then just waited there for a couple more light changes!

astrojax astrojax 12:38 pm 17 Oct 08

but the last two lines don’t rhyme…

p1 p1 10:31 am 17 Oct 08

I like the Offspring’s approach….

Drivers are rude
such attitudes
but when I show my piece
complaints cease
something’s odd
feel like I’m god
you stupid dumbsh*t
goddamned motherf*cker!

Woody Mann-Caruso Woody Mann-Caruso 8:57 am 17 Oct 08

frangipani tarts

Gold.

mdme workalot mdme workalot 8:45 am 17 Oct 08

Geez, and you guys think the frangipani tarts are passive-aggressive 🙂

shanefos shanefos 8:20 am 17 Oct 08

Piratemonkey said :

Oh and if they decide to follow you, clear your schedule, don’t speed, dont do anything too dangerious/illegal just make them follow you on the most random slow speed drive of their life. Indicate one way, turn the other, random u turns, make them work for their i’ll founded and entirely unlikely retibution they so clearly hunger for. So much fun.

LOL! I like it, Piratemonkey! That is gonna keep me chuckling quietly to myself for the rest of the day!

Piratemonkey Piratemonkey 3:29 am 17 Oct 08

No no no no. Bust out the middle finger and do anything to piss them off as much as possible.
Then should they get outta the car, grab a handful of reverse, throw in some revs and watch them run for their life. If they don’t run move a bit. If they still don’t run its time to flatten them.

I had a rather obese old fart running faster then i thought humanly possible the other day. He even jumped and slammed his van door behind him. 🙂 Much rofl followed.

Oh and if they decide to follow you, clear your schedule, don’t speed, dont do anything too dangerious/illegal just make them follow you on the most random slow speed drive of their life. Indicate one way, turn the other, random u turns, make them work for their i’ll founded and entirely unlikely retibution they so clearly hunger for. So much fun. Oh and if things get outta hand re-read my first point.

Overheard Overheard 3:21 am 17 Oct 08

DawnDrifter said :

lol @ ant and bitterman
may take a leaf out of your book if it happens to me. I got one of those bike racks attached to my toe bar, would make a nice impression on the offending tossers front end

Hmmmmmm. I think if someone ran into your ‘toe bar’, you might have to foot the bill.

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