Monopoly is more than a great educational game – it’s an opportunity to have an all-out barney with your siblings. It’s a competition to get the most money and bankrupt everyone else. Excellent fun.
So why don’t we have a Monopoly game for the public service? It is actually sort of a monopoly. That game would sell like hotcakes, at least in Canberra.
Who would be Park Lane and Mayfair? Obviously – Treasury and PM&C. But won’t Finance be unhappy about that? The cheap streets like Old Kent Rd would have to be Industry and Agriculture.
Instead of the utilities, we could have the APSC and the ANAO. Makes sense.
The railway stations would become the ATO, ACCC, APRA and ASIC.
Chance and Community Chest cards would become the NACC and Senate Estimates.
Then, we would have cards that include the following: “You have received 10 Senate Estimates questions on notice – miss five turns.” “You have made a typo in a cabinet brief, return to Go.”
“The Departmental Secretary provides the wrong figures to estimates and your job is to make them accurate – go back to Go and give any money you have to the RBA.”
“You are a graduate recruit with a PhD in some obscure area – advance to PM&C.”
“Your minister made a mistake and you are the scapegoat, lose three turns, then you are promoted to Secretary and receive $40,000 from the RBA.”
“Your minister has been demoted from Cabinet, go back to Go.”
“You have won a job in DFAT, have 10 more turns.” “Your enterprise agreement has been delayed by union activity – pay a fine of $500.”
“You retire in the CSS scheme – receive $50,000 from the bank each turn for the rest of the game.”
“The coalition wins the election, every player loses three turns and pays the RBA $3000.”
“If the ALP wins the election, every player receives $20,000.” “The Greens have the balance of power—nothing happens; play on.”
“Your Cabinet Submission is late. You have been transferred to an unknown board secretariat. Pay the RBA $500.”
“Your new division head is a transfer from a central agency – lose five turns.”
“Your policy project receives positive media coverage – collect $5000.” “Your defence project overspends by $1 billion – play on, nothing happens.”
“You have been found defrauding the ATO. Go to Jail, directly to Jail, and do not pass Go.”
“Your laptop won’t start, lose five turns.”
“You are an ACT public servant, and your Minister is from The Greens, go back to Go and pay a fine of $10,000.”
“You are an ACT public servant and have eight different ministers to report to – lose ten turns.”
I’m sure others have better ideas.
Of course, copyright would stop this being produced. It would sell, though. A lot.
As a general comment on the recently released Canberra Monopoly game, wouldn’t it be more realistic if every second square was a 40 km zone? If you land on one of those squares, you pay $370 to the government, just like real life.
Peter Strong has announced his candidacy as an independent in the 2024 ACT election.