7 March 2009

Bad public servant! No cookie!

| JessicaLikesChocolate
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My dear friend works at a government department and is used to seeing some strange events and unusual … quirks.

But this morning he wondered… what kind of punishment does the RiotACT community think should be reserved for the driver of this car?

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VYBerlinaV8_the_one_they_all_copy12:11 pm 19 Mar 09

Several years ago I used to drive one of those tiny 3 cylinder cars which was very narrow. Being a bit of a smartass, I would see a situation like this, and squeeze the tiny car into the remaining space. Of course, the owner of the middle parked car couldn’t open their door.

The car’s parked at the base of the Benjamin offices in Belconnen if anyone wanted to see it’s there regularly.

Maybe there were two invisible pink unicorns standing on the only two free car parking spaces available, so the driver parked their car between them?

Maybe the driver was disabled, and they had to park like that because lazy twats had parked in all the disabled spots? Or maybe they had borrowed a car whilst getting their own car serviced, forgot to get the disabled permit out and didn’t want a ticket?

ant said :

Muttsybignuts said :

so he wiped some dog poo on the underside of the accelerator peddle …you wouldn’t think to look behind a peddle.

…he should have put cat poo on the peddle….

Honestly – what are the chances of two people in the SAME THREAD having missed out on the EXACT SAME DAY OF KINDERGARTEN where they teach you how to spell “PEDAL”?

Add to the gripes the ABC ads referring to “store” instead of “shop”.

At least the advertisement was still done with an Australian accent. Time was when at least the commercials were Australian. Bring back the days when Barbie was “Baaaahbie”, I say. Last time I looked at the telly she seemed to have become “Borbie”.

Well, they weren’t my idea.

People need to stand up and tell the idiots that we don’t want this creeping americanisation here.

That crap ad has been on a few times tonight, it’s about school lunches, but I am not sure who it’s an ad for. Math, bloody hell. We must put a stop to that.

And that kid is talking with his mouth full, which is what americans do. I can generalise here. I have never encountered an american with table manners. Ever.

Anzac “cookies”??! Soap and water, ant!!

: D

Actually, you’d find a Trooper, not the Sheriff, for a parking/traffic matter.

I deplore Americanisms too. There’s a crap ad on now where the kid declares he is bad at “math”. Ugh.

And who will ever forget the Anzac “cookies” that appeared a few years back.

sorry, but ‘cookie’??

the joke referred is american, and even it uses ‘biscuit’…

…sheesh, next you’ll be spelling arse ‘ass’, too? did the individual who was the driver of this auto like totally suck, or what. like, f’sure. leave something nasty on his hood or stuffed into the trunk and go tell the sheriff, then go ride a bus to get away.

agree, one of palindrome’s better cartoons… ; )

panama said :

Granny said :

The cartoon is funny!

Sigh. Finally.

Chin up Panama. I liked it too.

Hey, I’ve always been nice to your cartoons!

: )

Granny said :

The cartoon is funny!

Sigh. Finally.

Gungahlin Al4:37 pm 07 Mar 09

The Brad said :

Print out this page, and put it on his windscreen.

Quickly, before he moves it.

Best suggestion here

Spam Box said :

How does one teach a cat to poo in the toilet?

Try this.

Slightly off topic huh ?

How does one teach a cat to poo in the toilet?

The cartoon is funny!

Stealing from the rich is only endearing if you then give it back to the poor, bloodnut. It’s the Robin Hood principle.

bahaha. awesome cartoon.

while i deigned to comment earlier, it’s probably some pube fighting the system and stealing from the multi story rich – taking twice as much for his daily $12.

Could be the start of a revolution maybe.

I know this carpark well. It’s never empty during a weekday. No excuse.

There’s actually a shortage of car spaces. AND there’s especially a shortage of places to park a motorbike (although you fit one on either side of this car).

And now you’re reading it again! It clearly is of fascination to you.

Yeah, 13 whole words. I’m heavily invested in it

vg said

vg said :

Who cares?

You, evidently. You typed a 3 line reply.

Who cares?

Somebody took the time to take this picture?

Get a life

that looks like the ACMA carpark. Probably some clown who is working on blocking my internet.

Personally I think this is a set up deliberately designed to evoke responses right here on RA (see post 45). The car is too perfectly positioned exactly between the spaces and, well, see post 45.
Maybe we need to see the forest for the trees, or hear the sound of one hand clapping or just take a breather and hear the sound of one hand clapping in the forest which has been bulldozed to cull the kangaroos to save the earless lizard which was eating the native grasses or something like that.
BTW, I only like prawns that have been sitting in vinegar for about 10 minutes and then put between 2 slices of FRESHLY sliced bread that have been spread with inches of butter.

Perspective people.
All together now, big breath through the nose, out through the mouth, repeat until we feel better.
I hope we all have a great long weekend…

Who ever it was that suggested several strong people pick up the car and move it, I suggest picking up the car, and placing a milk crate under each wheel, so that the whole thing is a foot off the ground. Fits Bundy’s “no damage” policy. Although a block of thermite placed in the middle of the bonnet has appeal to.

Despite my age I’m still a person, monomania. I’m not that different.

: )

I know you mean well, and if I really thought someone was being hurt I hope you know that I’d be using my AK thing to cover your back. I’d love to have been able to agree with you, but in this case I’ve looked at life from both sides now, from up and down but still somehow … (oops, sorry!) … and I just couldn’t agree.

I’ll accept what you say in exactly the same spirit Granny. My major objection was the number plate. If I have any sensitivity at all it is of people who get their jollies because of the embarrassment of other people. In these circumstances only some win and others lose. Humour as a competitive sport. Not entertainment to my mind. Maybe a different generation.

That’s definitely a bwahahahahahaaaa, Bundy!

; )

I can’t think of a single “good” reason to park this way. Don’t agree with damaging the vehicle, much more into dumping a large amount of inconvenience on the inconsiderate pratt.
Bundy arrives, dons fluoro vest (no-one questions a dude in a fluoro vest) and dyna bolts a bollard two inches in front of the car. Guaranteed to take 473 forward and back manoeuvers to get out, bollard will not inconvenience next parker as it’s on the dividing line.
Just think about it, full lock left, inch forward, full lock right, inch back, …..
He He He He or should that be bwahahahahahaaaa

Sorry mutley that was to monomania! Many things are a Riot at my place ….

You don’t think Katy Gallagher gets hurt by what’s posted? Or Todd Carney? How far do you want to take it? Even convicted ferret torturers Thomas Sorahan and Adriano Larobina are probably hurt and offended by a few of the comments on RiotACT.

I’m not going to recognise that car from a bar of soap

Bath time must be a riot at your place Granny 😉

monomania said :

Am I in your sights Granny?

Nope. I actually agree with you about many things.

I think I’ve been polite to you as well, but I’m kind of upset about you raking yesterday’s issue over again.

I think that’s been hard enough for the person involved, and when somebody’s surrendered their sword, badge, stripes and even had their bowler hat punched in then it’s not necessary to kick them for good measure while they’re down.

And I think by your logic we can’t talk about anything or anyone. If you dislike the site so much nobody is forcing you to be here.

I think your comments are usually worthwhile and sensible, but I really think that you’re being a bit of a Mrs Jessup on this thread.

‘You young hoodlums making fun of the way that car is parked had better get home right now or I’ll tell your mothers!’

I realise that the car parks at this particular car park are rather close together, but even still…

Am I in your sights Granny?

Granny said :

Shock! Horror!

That’s a little dramatic even for you.

What this driver did was selfish in the extreme.

Used a whole extra parking space. Is the building full?

Personally I can’t see how judging JessicaLikesChocolate and those who have participated in a bit of harmless fun and cracked a few jokes is any different from what you’re complaining about yourself.

I can see that.

I’m not going to recognise that car from a bar of soap or the person that owns it, nor is anybody else.]

I don’t think that is true. Think of how many cars of people you know and don’t know you know. Anyway isn’t that the purpose of “naming and shaming”

This is certainly not the first bad parking picture on RiotACT. It’s the sort of thing that people enjoy discussing and for the life of me I can’t see what harm it is doing.

I can see that.

But then you have no idea about the particular state of mind of the person you called selfish in the extreme was in when they parked like that or if they always did so. So they get to be called among other things excrement and people are encouraged with rightous indignation to damage their vehicle. Over a parking space and in good fun.

Go RiotACT

Yay for joke cracking… !!

I personally think it would have been hilarious for them to have been booked, as clearly they paid for parking their car. However not to take up 2 car parks.

Try explaining that one to get out of the fine, concidering parking inspectors take pics these days.

Nuke it, with cat poo.

And I agree with Granny. And as for blurring number plates, well, unless you have access to the very secure databases to find out who owns it AND plan to stalk them, a number plate is a decoration that every car you see sports. And they’re not blurred.

Granny said :

Nuke it.

from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure.

Sorry, that was addressed to monomania.

You know what, no one has been named and shamed. The car has been moved. People have had a bit of fun with a photo of a car.

Shock! Horror!

What this driver did was selfish in the extreme.

Personally I can’t see how judging JessicaLikesChocolate and those who have participated in a bit of harmless fun and cracked a few jokes is any different from what you’re complaining about yourself.

I’m not going to recognise that car from a bar of soap or the person that owns it, nor is anybody else.

It’s possible that one of us could have been bothered to go down and attempt to find this car and wreak our horrible revenge, but it’s much more likely to happen from the inevitability of a motorist on the spot being extremely pissed off.

This is certainly not the first bad parking picture on RiotACT. It’s the sort of thing that people enjoy discussing and for the life of me I can’t see what harm it is doing.

Pommy bastard5:19 pm 06 Mar 09

ant said :

Pommy bastard said :

A decent sized spud rammed up the exhaust does wonders.

No, the spud just comes out. I think it was mythbusters who tested teh various favourite motor revenges, including the spud and the sugar in the petrol, both of which were found to be useless.

What they DID find though was bleach in the oil does the trick.

Thanks for that ant. I’ll remember to buy more bleach. 🙂

A screwdriver in the tyres does the trick as well.
I once had 2 tyres screwdrivered, and only 1 spare, as you do. In fact the whole street had car tyres screwdrivered.

OzChick said :

This guy posted over 40 incidents yesterday. He must really hate bad drivers.

http://www.ratetheplate.com.au/member.go?user=Uralla9

Uralla has reported over 10000 number plates of “bad drivers”

That must make him an expert. And very good at driving while writing.

Or a meat axe.

Pommy bastard said :

A decent sized spud rammed up the exhaust does wonders.

No, the spud just comes out. I think it was mythbusters who tested teh various favourite motor revenges, including the spud and the sugar in the petrol, both of which were found to be useless.

What they DID find though was bleach in the oil does the trick.

Muttsybignuts said :

so he wiped some dog poo on the underside of the accelerator peddle in the friends car. The stink was awful and they couldn’t find the source. He searched everywhere however you wouldn’t think to look behind a peddle.

That’s all very well, but for truly evil revenge, he should have put cat poo on the peddle. Mate would have had to sell the car.

In the US, authorities are deploring the increasing numbers of people teaching their cats to poo in the toilet, as apparently cat poo is noxious and the sewerage plants aren’t set up to deal with it. I know people here are teaching their cats to poo in the toilet, so it’s just a matter of time before we also get told to stop it.

monomania said :

Who knows what motivated Bitterman to complain about the wrongfull use of a parking space …

I think he made it very clear that someone he cares about has a need of them.

Pommy bastard said :

A decent sized spud rammed up the exhaust does wonders.

I hope that’s not a euphemism.

Pommy bastard5:02 pm 06 Mar 09

A decent sized spud rammed up the exhaust does wonders.

Print out this page, and put it on his windscreen.

Quickly, before he moves it.

What a turd! It looks a lot like they’ve done that so no one will park next to them and bang their car with their doors. They should never park at shopping centres/supermarkets frequented by women then, as they are awful. Most of them seem to drive large cars which they cannot park, and are rather cavalier about door-banging, shopping trolleys, and prams.

If that parking area gets filled up though, there’s sure to be some grumpy workmates wishing to take revenge on the 2-space parker.

Granny said :

Citizen militia snoops? … Oh, c’mon!

Militia??

Excuse me whilst I do something with my AK whatsy ….

It’s your AK mobile phone.

But I do take your point. Militia are an organized group that have a common purpose.

Who knows what motivated Bitterman to complain about the wrongfull use of a parking space, perhaps an overdeveloped sense of rightfulness.

Sweet Jessica has done it for a giggle. It isn’t even her parking building.

Probably like when they get sent out to buy the tampons and stuff.

And we assume it is a woman, why?

BTW, I’ve seen blokes driving cars with frangipani stickers, though not many, I’ll grant you.

Perhaps make sure that he has dog and white stick with him next time.

After yesterday’s effort, shouldn’t we also be critiquing this drivers gardening skills, and family connections?

As for the car in this pic, I’m guessing something along the lines of ‘mate borrows car, mate is an idiot, mate returns car and parks like tool’.

Muttsybignuts4:03 pm 06 Mar 09

p1 said :

Remove hubcap, then replace hubcap full of prawns.

No, see the problem with this is the stink is outside the car. You need to blend up some prawns and inject them into air vents or similar that get the stench into the vehicle.

…a nice segue way into a true story. My mate wanted some kind of juvenile revenge on another mate for something or other so he wiped some dog poo on the underside of the accelerator peddle in the friends car. The stink was awful and they couldn’t find the source. He searched everywhere however you wouldn’t think to look behind a peddle.

JessicaLikesChocolate said :

We love all the hilarious responses!

I thought about whether or not to post or blurring the plates but come on people – it’s funny and the person did this on purpose in public for everyone to see!

And so did you except like me, you are using a pseudonym.

Where are the frangapani stickers ?

JessicaLikesChocolate3:47 pm 06 Mar 09

We love all the hilarious responses!

To clarify what we’re seeing: it’s a public “Pay and display, park in bays only” car park, the same ones you see near shopping malls and some government buildings, with only one ticket on the dash.

My friendly friend now reports the car has been moved and now occupies a single bay.

I thought about whether or not to post or blurring the plates but come on people – it’s funny and the person did this on purpose in public for everyone to see!

Just as a side note. I’ve discovered if you drop a piece of KFC on a car and leave it for a while it does funny things to the paintwork.

This came to me after a drunken fun bucket fight in a mates driveway.

canberra bureaucrat3:43 pm 06 Mar 09

p1 said :

Vegemite under the door handles?

Liquid nails is $5 a tube at bunnings.

Even better – buy a couple of cartons of the stuff and they can park there forever!

AngryHenry said :

The number plate maybe could have been blurred out but it’s no different than naming and shamming people on ratetheplate.com

Which is even worse

Mummy, Johnny took another bickie.

StrangeAttractor3:33 pm 06 Mar 09

that comes under the ‘public car park’ disclaimer hellspice 😉

StrangeAttractor said :

what kind of car park was it?

My uncle has paid for 2 reserved spots for his car in the parking tower next to his office, and parks like that. Granted, he’s not parking a mazda, usually some imported sportscar.

My point being, if they’ve paid for the 2 spots, what’s the problem? Although it’s a pretty poor effort if it was done in a public car park.

what if its a free carpark, can you use 2 spots ?

‘belly full of prawns’ – yummy!

What p1 said but eat the prawns first and just put the shells and heads in, same result but you’ve got a belly full of prawns.

proofpositive said :

http://www.ratetheplate.com.au/

This guy posted over 40 incidents yesterday. He must really hate bad drivers.

http://www.ratetheplate.com.au/member.go?user=Uralla9

Put a for sale sign on it and start a live auction in front of it around knock off time.

Remove hubcap, then replace hubcap full of prawns.

Dare I suggest a photo, recording the registration number and emailing the relevant authorities

I thought that RiotACT was the right place for whinging?

Vegemite under the door handles?

Muttsybignuts3:02 pm 06 Mar 09

Maybe take a photo of the car and post it on a local website…oh hang on.

Granny said :

Citizen militia snoops? … Oh, c’mon!

Militia??

Excuse me whilst I do something with my AK whatsy ….

Lock and load Granny!

Why didn’t they do what every other Canberran does and park on the footpath (in the few streets which actually have footpaths) or on the nature strip?

monomania said :

Danman said :

Dare I suggest a photo, recording the registration number and emailing the relevant authorities

Well there is a photo and a number plate.

How does this post differ from Bitterman’s post of yesterday?

What would we do if we didn’t have what would you do posts?

Forget about Big Brother, the citizen militia snoops are everywhere.

How does it differ from Vic’s post yesterday? You’re kidding right.

1. It’s not a disabled spot.

2. The car is parked in not one but two spaces.

3. The poster is not going to be faced with swallowing their pride and apologising to her neighbours for it.

The number plate maybe could have been blurred out but it’s no different than naming and shamming people on ratetheplate.com

Although someone who parks like that obviously couldn’t give a toss about what someone else thinks or has to say about it. So ‘vent away people’ I say.

StrangeAttractor2:40 pm 06 Mar 09

what kind of car park was it?

My uncle has paid for 2 reserved spots for his car in the parking tower next to his office, and parks like that. Granted, he’s not parking a mazda, usually some imported sportscar.

My point being, if they’ve paid for the 2 spots, what’s the problem? Although it’s a pretty poor effort if it was done in a public car park.

Citizen militia snoops? … Oh, c’mon!

Militia??

Excuse me whilst I do something with my AK whatsy ….

Danman said :

Dare I suggest a photo, recording the registration number and emailing the relevant authorities

Well there is a photo and a number plate.

How does this post differ from Bitterman’s post of yesterday?

What would we do if we didn’t have what would you do posts?

Forget about Big Brother, the citizen militia snoops are everywhere.

Now come on we can’t be posting Private Details of people.

My friend Chris had his ID stolen and basically blasted onto the internet for “gay sex” (nothing wrong if u like that) but it tooks months for him to sort it all out

caf said :

It’s not accidental. People do that so that they aren’t risking having the cars on either side open their doors into them.

It’s pretty selfish.

no not really you should see the sides of my car, although im over it now as ive found keys and knees a fair but viable option

The name of the owner should be posted.

I have heard you can get these details off the WWW but I have looked and can’t find anything (limited time).

It’s obvious s/he parked that way intentionaly.

What selfish piece of excrement.

Absent Diane2:11 pm 06 Mar 09

icedrew – I agree 100%. People just have no moral fibre these days.

Loosen the screws on the number plates. Think of it as giving karma a helping hand!

Come of people think of a bit of respect of the human being driving that car. It sickens me that we have loss any type of love or respect for the follow Canberra Person

You should hang your head in shame this person could be a sensitive new age person and if they find this post then that’s it there life is over

Holden Caulfield2:09 pm 06 Mar 09

C’mon, the joke is already on the driver for owning a shitty old Mazda.

Absent Diane2:06 pm 06 Mar 09

I think that is a very practical way of parking. if the person is fat it means they can get out of the car easily. Kudos to the driver of that car. A job really well done!!!

proofpositive2:05 pm 06 Mar 09

Get yourself and a mate to park within a whisker of their car on either side.
Go and spend the day shopping, go to a movie (or two) and then find a place for dinner before coming back to your cars.
If it is your typical modern sedan they can’t get back into their car (even through the boot) they will so learn not to do it again next time.
The only drawback is that others may think you are the ars3hols instead.

find someone who has gotton a parking ticket recently, use their envelope and put in your own ticket littered with wahtever insults best suits your mood.

yeahright said :

You wouldn’t know how badly the car that they parked next to was placed though would you. Maybe there was a truck parked sideways when they arrived.

Yeahright is that your car?

superglue the door handles shut

RandomPoster1:46 pm 06 Mar 09

caf, I agree, but that isn’t the sort of car you would bother doing that for.

It’s not accidental. People do that so that they aren’t risking having the cars on either side open their doors into them.

It’s pretty selfish.

This reminds me of when the other side of Bunda Street was just a big open air carpark. Part of it was unmarked. Cars would park wide apart such that there was almost, but not quite enough, room to park between them and the next car, thereby depriving lots of people of carparking. Like they still do at Bruce Stadium or any other unmarked carpark. Used to drive me nutty before I reformed and zenned on all matters automobile. (Except the chick this morning who turned in front of me on a roundabout with no indicator and her mobile up to her ear! My zen slipped momentarily…)

Put a warning notice on the car. Escalate as necessary for a repeat offender.

Park a couple of really scruffy minis on either side.

Dare I suggest a photo, recording the registration number and emailing the relevant authorities

You wouldn’t know how badly the car that they parked next to was placed though would you. Maybe there was a truck parked sideways when they arrived.

neanderthalsis1:24 pm 06 Mar 09

sensible that is…

neanderthalsis1:23 pm 06 Mar 09

Some options:

1. Get the biggest 3 blokes in the dept to lift it onto its side.
2. Print it out on a poster title “Car, Free to Good Home” and put it on notice boards around the Dept.
3. Print out flyers advertising “spacial awareness training for women drivers” and put it under the wipers.
4. Cover it with post it notes
5. Get the 8 biggest blokes in the Dept and turn it sideways so it’s across the two carparks and can’t leave if the adjacent carparks are occupied.
6. Report it to the appropriate parking rangers / centre managers (not much fun but paerhaps a more sinsible option).

Nothing less than the cutting of the car in half with an angle grinder.
Each parking space will then be given half the car.

You know it makes sense.

Get their car keyed.

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