Canberra too ignorant and un-australian for AFL?

Deckard
I’m perfectly fine with watching all four football codes (I’m simply pointing out some of the finer features of the great Australian game to our good friend here who seems to be having trouble grappling with logic).

In Melbourne we have no problem with either union or league (although we do get confused as to which is which – is it union or league that has the space man helmets where they say hup, hup, hup? – we are accustomed to seeing that one on television).

Get a room guys. What’s wrong with watching them both? Like most people I know.

…. if they can’t kick a footy, they can always take up sumo wrestling – although there’s a bit of skill in that…

…but can any of the big men actually kick a footy over a jam tin?

To get to a league ‘scoring range’ you get six attempts while 13 big men try to smash you into the ground, passing the ball in the opposite direction to the target the whole time. To get to an AFL ‘scoring range’ you just need to be prancing somewhere in the area (no positions, no offside – who has time to remember all that _and_ their first name?) and have the ball bounce off you (or the opposing team, who cares?)

But the scoring range is the full width of the playing surface – that’s pretty wide.

Fortunately the ground is the size of a postage stamp so the fat boys don’t have to run too far (because if they were playing aussie rules, they’d be sucking in the big ones within two minutes of the ball up).

You mean I’ve been under the illusion all my life that the game is Australian?

I will desist from calling it the great Australian game forthwith.

Aww, you can do better than that, pippy.

A league goal is 5.5 m wide and 3m off the ground. If somebody manages to kick the ball through that elevated, narrow target they get a whopping 1 point.

An AFL goal is three sets of posts, each 6.4m wide. You can dribble the ball on the ground from right in front of the goal and get 6 points. Hell, it could bounce it off an opposing player’s head and go through the posts by fluke and I’d still get a point for effort – the same as a league player gets for hitting a much, much smaller target from much further away. We’d say ‘that’s ar$e’ but you call it a ‘behind’ so nobody’s feelings get hurt.

AFL is a special sport for special little boys who need to feel special about everything they do, including missing. The whole game has been built around incompetence:

“I can’t run without fumbling the ball!”
“That’s OK – we’ll make it a rule that you *have* to drop it while you’re running!”
“I caught it! I actually caught it!”
“That’s super! OK, everybody stop while little Fernando gets a free kick for being such a special winner!”
“I tried to kick it in, but it bounced off my face instead.”
“There there precious. You can get a point anyway because you’re daddy’s special angel.”

No Thumper it was actually an aboriginal game played by the natives or whatever the AFL want to come up with this week, to prove the game is actually Australian.

Thumper
that’s certainly part of the mythology of the great Australian game.

Well Thumper – then you know what I’m talking about – your team mates can’t kick over a jam tin.

If the scoring target is 21 metres wide, you clearly are not getting a score for a miss, so anyone insisting that is even stupider than the fish in the barrell.

How wide is the try line 70M? 75M?

The concept of the try was created once the incapacity of a rugby player to kick the ball thorugh the sticks was duly noted.

Does it matter if it misses? I’ll still get points anyway, won’t I? It’s amazed any of you are even born – your fathers would’ve been satisfied to get it between any posts.

Toying with you AFL numpties is like shooting particularly stupid fish in a very small barrel.

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

Look, there are obviously some hurt feeling here. How about this – you stand 15m over there, I’ll kick a ball to you, and if you can manage to catch it without dropping it, you get a Special Prize and we all get to call you ‘Mark’. That should make you feel warm and fuzzy.

I’ve played plenty of footy in regional NSW, and have come across fat boys like this bloke, who think they can stroll up and trick up a kick as easy as pie. But this is the problem with such fat boys:

1. they can’t hit a barn door with eithe a kick or a handball
2. they can’t kick over a jam tin
3. they can’t kick on the run without doing a little hop (and then lolly pop it straigth up in the air)
4. they just can’t kick full stop.

So when this fat boy says, stand 15 m away and I’ll kick it to you – will it get anywhere near me? because my experience with fat boys is that they can’t hit you on the chest from 15 m with anything approximating a half decent kick.

Better still fat boy, what say you stand 65 metres away from me and try and get the Sherrin anywhere within my vicinity (I’ll be standing there all week and it won’t happen)

wow – I’m famous!!

Keep on digging Woody.

I drove past Manuka oval on Saturday afternoon, must have been just at the end of the game, and despite having lived in the area for over a year I’ve NEVER seen it so busy as it was then. I tell ya, it was AFL in Canberra and it drew a heck of a crowd. I can only assume that, since half of Canberra used to live in Melbourne, we’ve brought the hysteria with us 😉

Nothing like objective sporting argument

It’s funny for a City which everyone claims to be no proper market for the AFL, that the majority of people you meet around the place do follow the AFL and also have a favourite team. It really does show in the attendance records that the AFL home and away games held here have larger attendances than 90% of the Raiders home games.

Just watching the NRL drill the nail into their own coffins is more interesting than watching a dozen or so sexed up morons run around throwing the ball to each other like little girls with absolutely no thought or skill about it. I understand why they need the cheerleaders at the NRL games, to wake the 5,000 people up for the second half of stop start, stop start, stop start.. ZzZzZzz. There’s no real suprise why attendance numbers for the AFL more than double the NRL and club membership for most AFL clubs is at least 3 times higher than any NRL club.

‘Carna pies.

Doesn’t matter which way you cut it, you get points for ineptitude. If they were fair dinkum about it, they’d just ask the bloke: “Were you aiming for the centre posts?” If he says yes, he shouldn’t get anything for missing his target. But they’re not fair dinkum, and so blokes who can’t aim get compensated – “oh yeah, I totally meant it to go to the left. Points please!”

They probably have urinal troughs installed in their homes because their egos would be crushed when they missed the bowl.

chewy14 said :

Wellington Sludge said :

You do get points for missing a goal, though – don’t you?

Nope. You get less points if you get it through the wider markers, and 6 times the points if you get it through the narrower markers. A bit like getting three points in basketball if you take a harder shot from further out, or getting less points in archery the further you are away from the bullseye – it’s all about degrees of accuracy.

Still not sure why people don’t get that – it seems simple to me.

I don’t care about the way they want to score AFL but that is the worst explanation ever.
In Basketball you don’t get points for hitting the ring or the backboard.
In archery if you miss the bullseye you get a certain score depending on how close you were. You have still missed the bullseye.
In AFL if you miss a goal but get it inside the behind posts you get one point. You have still missed the goal.

Again, simple concept. It’s not about “missing the goal”, it’s about accuracy between the more spread out point markers (1 point) and the closer goal markers (6 points). Your archery example illustrates it perfectly – you still get a score if you’re not 100% accurate, as long as you get the arrow in another scoring region.

The original point is that some Rugby followers, who are totally ignorant of the AFL code and it’s rules, use phrases like “you get points for missing a goal” as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to break through a defence and kick the ball between sticks. It’s not. Just watch any match to verify that. The people who make that comment seem to think that they are making an intelligent comment, where it’s really on a par with “well, if you get a rugby ball over the line, they give you points for trying. That’s why it’s a try”

(But then reading the comments about tippy-toes and squealing and nobody touching the man with the ball just shows the level of ignorance there is out there, so I shouldn’t be surprised).

AFL’s shit

#32 vg – I think Eddie’s his driver now 🙂

Wellington Sludge said :

You do get points for missing a goal, though – don’t you?

Nope. You get less points if you get it through the wider markers, and 6 times the points if you get it through the narrower markers. A bit like getting three points in basketball if you take a harder shot from further out, or getting less points in archery the further you are away from the bullseye – it’s all about degrees of accuracy.

Still not sure why people don’t get that – it seems simple to me.

I don’t care about the way they want to score AFL but that is the worst explanation ever.
In Basketball you don’t get points for hitting the ring or the backboard.
In archery if you miss the bullseye you get a certain score depending on how close you were. You have still missed the bullseye.
In AFL if you miss a goal but get it inside the behind posts you get one point. You have still missed the goal.

mebbe woody was too close to posting time to have read holden caulfield’s previous post.

Read it. Yawn. The fact that an AFL fan had enough hand-eye coordination to type was the most amazing thing about it.

Look, there are obviously some hurt feeling here. How about this – you stand 15m over there, I’ll kick a ball to you, and if you can manage to catch it without dropping it, you get a Special Prize and we all get to call you ‘Mark’. That should make you feel warm and fuzzy.

Nambucco Deliria said :

Wellington Sludge said :

There are plenty of people in the ACT who are supporters of an AFL team, so yes we are worthy. However, when moronic comments like “you get points for missing a goal” are bandied about by the ignorant masses, you can start to understand why we are under-appreciated by Victorians. (Not to mention the fact that general NSW and ACT residents do not support their sporting teams with even half the religious fervour that happens in SA, WA and Vic. (as anyone who has lived in those states can attest to).

You do get points for missing a goal, though – don’t you?

Nope. You get less points if you get it through the wider markers, and 6 times the points if you get it through the narrower markers. A bit like getting three points in basketball if you take a harder shot from further out, or getting less points in archery the further you are away from the bullseye – it’s all about degrees of accuracy.

Still not sure why people don’t get that – it seems simple to me.

barking toad said :

Collingwood get more spectators at training sessions than most league clubs get at their games.

There’s plenty of passion for AFL in Canberra but it’s mainly for clubs supported from the old VFL. And then there’s the Swans supporters who are gay.

Yeah but who does Alan Didak get his lifts home with again?

Do we really give 2 f*cks what some anonymous internet twat says on a forum? I mean really. His post is as important as my one

have a look at the protective clothing worn by both nrl and afl players. the afl players are by far less armoured than the nrl players. they aren’t massive lads, they rely on skill, rather than brute force. It is a very energy intensive game. NRL players, standing beside an afl player, seem to dwarf them.

There’s skills (some the same, some different) in all the football codes.

just that in league they need stand about to watch each other express them… mebbe woody was too close to posting time to have read holden caulfield’s previous post. suggest you go back and do so now. +1, holden…

I’ll pretend to be johnboy here…

“Not the place to debate the relevant merits of each code please people”.

Hehe…sorry jb, but I reckon it was coming soon.

There’s skills (some the same, some different) in all the football codes.

chewy14 said :

jake555 said :

Anyone can run, throw a ball backwards and grab someone else’s legs to stop them running.

Except for AFL teams that hire ex Rugby League players and coaches as tackling experts?

Correct, AFL teams that hire ex Rugby League players and coaches as tackling experts cannot grab legs during a tackle. What’s your point?

Long time AFL supporter here.

jake555 said :

Anyone can run, throw a ball backwards and grab someone else’s legs to stop them running.

Except for AFL teams that hire ex Rugby League players and coaches as tackling experts?

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

you have to dispose of the ball before being tackled

That explains why they jump on their tippy-toes and throw their arms and the ball over their head and screw up their eyes and squeal whenever anybody gets close, then. Then they all fumble and stumble after the randomly bouncing ball again. It’s a game of high skill, that’s for sure.

WMC, there’s nothing random about the bounce of the ball, you just need to know how to read it. Are you a soccer fan perchance?

Please, please, please don’t tell me you’re a rugby league supporter. I’m not having a dig at RL, I can happily sit through a decent game, however, let no RL supporter even begin to claim there is more skill involved than AFL.

Anyone can run, throw a ball backwards and grab someone else’s legs to stop them running.

djk said :

The Axe Man said :

I think Pippinu has another agenda. Perhaps a Canberra soccer supporter?

quite possible, given his blog (linked from author page in article):

http://pippinu.blogspot.com/

Good work.
I wouldn’t take his opinion for much worth then. Seems to be another in fear of a football code not much to his liking

The Axe Man said :

I think Pippinu has another agenda. Perhaps a Canberra soccer supporter?

quite possible, given his blog (linked from author page in article):

http://pippinu.blogspot.com/

you have to dispose of the ball before being tackled

That explains why they jump on their tippy-toes and throw their arms and the ball over their head and screw up their eyes and squeal whenever anybody gets close, then. Then they all fumble and stumble after the randomly bouncing ball again. It’s a game of high skill, that’s for sure.

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

Oh noes. We’re not worthy for your ‘sport’ in which skinny little boys literally stumble around chasing a ball bouncing out of control. We only have the skills to kick a ball through one set of posts, over a bar, not “three sets so you don’t feel bad if you miss, and along the ground will be fine, son, don’t stretch yourself.” We don’t have the guts to play a game where once somebody actually manages to picks up a ball, nobody can touch the poor diddums.

AFL – Absolutely F.cking Lame.

Sometimes it is better to be thought a fool, than to put that garbage in writing and remove all doubt.

peterh said :

speaking as a port supporter, who goes home to adelaide infrequently, we are not overly fanatical about the game. much. really.

i feel your pain

Growling Ferret said :

“there’s the Swans supporters who are gay.”

He’s spot on Mr Magoo. The average Swans fans are Swanny Come Lately happy clapper types, just like Crows fans.

We are Collingwood. The rest of you just wish you were.

Settle down children its OK.

You can both be as gay as each other.

Growling Ferret said :

We are Collingwood. The rest of you just wish you were.

Pfft, one flag in 50 years, haha, I think you’re dreaming son.

You could have said all of that in one word MrMagoo: Colliwobbles.

Canberrans understand Aussie Rules, half our population has Victorian roots.

“there’s the Swans supporters who are gay.”

He’s spot on Mr Magoo. The average Swans fans are Swanny Come Lately happy clapper types, just like Crows fans.

We are Collingwood. The rest of you just wish you were.

Collingwood fans can spell feral, too. 🙂

barking toad said :

Collingwood get more spectators at training sessions than most league clubs get at their games.

There’s plenty of passion for AFL in Canberra but it’s mainly for clubs supported from the old VFL. And then there’s the Swans supporters who are gay.

Typical Collingwood Fan. Everyone else’s supporters are gay or whatever. You’ve had one recent Premiership, nearly 20 years ago and since then you’ve bumbled and stumbled your way through year after year, choking twice. Grow up move on or get back to Melbourne with the rest of the ferrals.

I think Canberran’s as a group of psorts lovers do understand the game and deserve to see it as much as anyone. Victorian’s claim Australian football as their own. but if you call it Australian football by that definition alone, everyone can and does understand it.

On the other point, i don’t support a 2nd team in sydney. It’s doomed to failure and the AFL will be pouring good money after bad. the Sydney market is saturated with football of amny codes, a 2nd team isn’t a viable option no matter how mcuh Andrew Demetriou wants us to believe it. I think Tassie deserves the next team long before a 2nd Sydney team should exist.

barking toad said :

Collingwood get more spectators at training sessions than most league clubs get at their games.

Collingwood get 15000 to their training sessions now?

I know AFL supporters are lazy but surely some of them have jobs to go to.

Collingwood get more spectators at training sessions than most league clubs get at their games.

There’s plenty of passion for AFL in Canberra but it’s mainly for clubs supported from the old VFL. And then there’s the Swans supporters who are gay.

The Eagles scarf on the back of my chair at work is appalled by this attitude.

Wellington Sludge said :

There are plenty of people in the ACT who are supporters of an AFL team, so yes we are worthy. However, when moronic comments like “you get points for missing a goal” are bandied about by the ignorant masses, you can start to understand why we are under-appreciated by Victorians. (Not to mention the fact that general NSW and ACT residents do not support their sporting teams with even half the religious fervour that happens in SA, WA and Vic. (as anyone who has lived in those states can attest to).

You do get points for missing a goal, though – don’t you?

if the largest city and the nation’s capital ‘don’t get it’, it is a bit rich calling it ‘the australian game’, then innit?

as for skid and woody and co., the denigrators, i would suggest that beneath the seething intoxication with the sport (and all sports) in melbourne there also run veins of such malcontent, so don’t think you speak for ‘canberra’. go on, call buddy franklin and big bad barry hall ‘stumbling skinny boys’ to their faces. go on. guts? mebbe they’ll treat you to some of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlgcLrpswhg. aw, diddums.

nobody can touch the poor diddums. really? you have to dispose of the ball before being tackled; no rule to prohibit tackles…

Near enough 13000 people turned up on a bitterly cold day to watch a game that was being broadcast live against the gate? They delay telecasts in Melbourne to maximise crowds, something that isn’t done in Canberra.

As for passion, if Collingwood, Carlton, Essendon or Richmond ever played here (and it won’t happen) you would get passionate fans. They would be feral, but passionate!

Home games sold to Canberra by poorly supported clubs such as the Dogs and Dees will not generate any less atmosphere than 15,000 people at the cavernous MCG…

Oh noes. We’re not worthy for your ‘sport’ in which skinny little boys literally stumble around chasing a ball bouncing out of control. We only have the skills to kick a ball through one set of posts, over a bar, not “three sets so you don’t feel bad if you miss, and along the ground will be fine, son, don’t stretch yourself.” We don’t have the guts to play a game where once somebody actually manages to picks up a ball, nobody can touch the poor diddums.

AFL – Absolutely F.cking Lame.

I moved from QLD to Victoria as a primary school aged child and I just couldn’t fathom the rampant obsession with the AFL (which was then VFL); the kids literally grew up on a diet of football, collecting footy cards, trading/swapping them at school, obsessing about players, playing on weekends and every school recess and lunchtime, branding duffle coats with player’s numbers and so on. It was an all-consuming football fervour that was much more obsessive than a typical QLD’s kid’s approach to the rugby. The adults weren’t much better. No – this type of devout, obsessive fervour isn’t as prevalent in Canberra or Sydney … (thank goodness) so if that is the litmus test for being ‘worthy’ then we probably do fail. That doesn’t mean we won’t pay money to watch the games and/or lend *sensible, moderate* support to a local team.

speaking as a port supporter, who goes home to adelaide infrequently, we are not overly fanatical about the game. much. really.

Lack of understanding? Yeah two teams trying to boot a piece of leather through some sticks with minimal rules is a mind-bending concept. Typical Victorian dikhead.

I think Pippinu has in wrong. A new Sydney team, and by extension Canberra, can and will offer the AFL quite a lot.
It’s about increasing the game in Australia’s biggest market and thus increasing the broadcast rights, tipped to hit about 1 billion dollars

It’s not about what Canberra or Sydney can offer in terms of football nous, it’s about putting money in the coffers.

He does nothing to address the fact that Sydney and Canberra both garner larger crowds than League does (I’m not sure about Rugby or soccer crowds but I would think they would be larger than that as well if not the same). Does League deserve a team in Canberra or X number of teams in Sydney?

I think Pippinu has another agenda. Perhaps a Canberra soccer supporter?

There are plenty of people in the ACT who are supporters of an AFL team, so yes we are worthy. However, when moronic comments like “you get points for missing a goal” are bandied about by the ignorant masses, you can start to understand why we are under-appreciated by Victorians. (Not to mention the fact that general NSW and ACT residents do not support their sporting teams with even half the religious fervour that happens in SA, WA and Vic. (as anyone who has lived in those states can attest to).