11 April 2008

Protest against Scientology

| esclave
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So I hear there’s to be a protest on Saturday against Scientology in Civic – is anyone here going? Perhaps it’s not the place to put your hand up for it as some protesters wear masks – but I’m just curious as to how many people are planning on turning up, or if it’s been done before in Canberra, how many people protested there?

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CanberraResident: They were specifically implicated in the 1987 Queen Street Massacre as a destabilising force with regard to a mentally ill man who killed 8 people and injured 5 others.


They’re watching! See the ad on the right hand side…

So, did anyone turn up?


DID YOU KNOW: The Pancake Parlor is owned by the ‘Church’ of Scientology?!

Yes folks, it really is…. anybody want a triple stack with maple syrup now??

gun street girl10:31 pm 12 Apr 08

If in doubt, there’s always the Alan Shore spin on the matter:


CanberraResident4:52 pm 12 Apr 08

GregW said :

The notion that Scientology does not hurt anybody is also absurd.

Really? Care to give some examples please? Have you experienced this first hand?

It would be nice if people bothered to read before they post.

Firstly many people view Scientology a cult/sect rather than a religion, infact it is a view shared by several European nations, and indeed South Australia until they were pressured to change their stance.

Secondly even if we do get liberal with our definition of a religion and include Scientology, the protests organised by Anonymous are a protest against the methods of the Church of Scientology not the ‘religion’ itself. You can be a Scientologist without belonging to the CoS.

Finally, the territories human rights act seeks to prevent persecution from religion, it does not and should not remove the right to criticize such ‘religions’. The notion that Scientology does not hurt anybody is also absurd.

CanberraResident9:34 am 12 Apr 08

I have something against the Anglicans, and the Roman Catholics, and the Presbyterians, and the Methodists, and the Jews, and Church of England, and the Buddhists, and every other religion on the face of this Earth and beyond … I am considering organising a protest for each one of these. It’s just not right !@#$%^&!!!

Just kidding …

Seriously though … why can’t people just leave the Church of Scientology alone …

To the planned protestors, how is it hurting you personally??

eh_steve is spot on with THIS:

eh_steve said :

Isn’t it funny that on April 24 we will have people protesting for human rights, however in this instance we will have people protesting against a right protected under our territory’s human rights act to practice whatever religion we like as long as we don’t hurt anybody. I wonder how many people are going to be showing up to both?

Isn’t it funny that on April 24 we will have people protesting for human rights, however in this instance we will have people protesting against a right protected under our territory’s human rights act to practice whatever religion we like as long as we don’t hurt anybody. I wonder how many people are going to be showing up to both?

i havv wun ov themm deegrees in Applyied SCience. that is y i werk at a hospital.

Speaking of hospitals [I was, you weren’t], just the other day, a doctor came over to sign a med chart. He went to take his biro from his shirt pocket but pulled out a rectal thermometer instead. He looked at it; paused; and said to me: “Some arshole has got my pen.”

But i think i understand why them Toologists run from ‘that’look in Toriness’ eyes. Think Pink. But any woman with the-look going is something to avoid.

LOVE those questions. They’re very specific.


The test is called the “Oxford Capacity Analysis” (“Oxford” as in “not the university, yes everyone gets confused, I don’t know why we don’t just change the name”). There’s a decent Wikipedia article on it, including sample questions and results (i.e. different ways of telling you that you’re in dire need of financial weight-loss) here:

They look for the vulnerable and gullible esclave, but in hindsight it would not have mattered how I filled out that test, the trick is getting you through the door and signing you up. I was labelled as ‘depressed/seeking answers’ because on the questionaire I said as a teenager I some times got depressed!

Esclave, The wikipedia article on scientology is quite informative:


… but it’s not as funny as the uncyclopedia rant:

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Scientology (language warning! naughty words.)

I once went into the CoS as the brother of a girl I was going out with at the time was keen to be tested, and we were in Civic with him.
We all got the test done (20-30 mins), but only he got taken aside for further post-test questioning in an auditing room, and then offered the $90 book.

She and I (who were his only way of getting a lift home) hung around being talked to by someone who believed the Christian bible was written by aliens but transmitted through hyperlight gravitation communications to Earth, but only Jesus and L Ron Hubbard were able to receive the messages.
Apparently Hubbard was the only one to get it completely correct, as evidenced by Hubbard’s books being wholly accurate represtations of modern science.

We all walked out thinking that Scientologists were far better value as entertainment than the movie we had paid for, but probably dangerous to the mental health of your average idiot.

So what do they give you, a type? i.e. ‘You need to buy this’ ‘You’re actually miserable, and should therefore buy this’

lolol @ fnaah – yeah I learnt from that one, but that office was packed with people – this was before Scientolgy became the new Islam so lots of people were curious about the place.

They have an office in Phillip above a Chinese restaurant and I notice somebody (not me!) has hurled about a dozen eggs at their windows, but because they’re on the second floor it’s too high for them to clean off!!!! lololol (wasn’t me)

i live in hope they will approach me again so i can tell them to f o right away – however they must recognise the look in my eye because it just doesn’t happen

duke, that was my exact experience, sans the bus issue on my very first day of my first visit to canberra, i was outraged (having a particular hatred of all things religious) when i realised what was going on – it’s a wonder i dared moving here permanently a few years after that!

Was a time when all you needed to do with a hot babe was buy her a couple of drinks.

Funny thing about that day, I actually found one of my mates upstairs already doing the test – she had snared him only 5 minutes earlier! lolol

It probably took so long because i was doing it properly, reading each question, considering the 4 possible answers then shading in the correct box.

She told me if i didn’t answer each one it would taint the final result, so I thought hell, i’ve already been here 30 minutes, might as well keep going!

Dear Mr Duke,

We’ve analysed your personality test, and found that you can be broadly described as “gullible”. With the right training, however (and a rather permanent departure of your hard earned cash, of course), we feel that you’ll fit right in here. We have scores more people like you whose thetans we need to purge. Oh, the purging!


The Church of Scientology

I’ve always been so tempted to do it and see what kind of questions they ask, but 45 minutes is a bit much. Couldn’t you just tell her you had enough after 15?

I was new in town, got bailed up in the civic interchange by this hot babe who offered me a free personality test. I had no idea it was scientology and as it only took 15 minutes thought I would do it while I waited for a bus.

The personality test was 100 multiple choice questions and it took 45 minutes, then I had to be ‘analysed’ by one of their ‘experts’ who told me how lost I was then he tried to sell me a copy of Dianetics for $90. Then I had to wait another hour for a bus.

This one’s in Garema Place – I was looking at some forums before and I think they’ve moved it from some obscure location to the city. No use protesting and not being seen/heard, I guess.

Isn’t the Dianetics\CoS locally based in Phillip (above Ming’s), with the Civic office just being a testing\indoctrination centre as they can’t afford the price of office space?
(IE: Its effectively shut down, with only testing & massage staff on Saturdays)

Ten shiny gold dollars may be donated (anonymously) to whoever shows up dressed either as a victim or perpetrator of the 1988 Queen Street Massacre.

And can the CoS put up a theatrical volcano billboard on their Phillip premises, just like they did in Sydney?

lol at neanderthalsis’ (dude your name requires too much thought to type!) “Thetin-spaceship-landing-ground”

Haha, incorrect, Duke? Do you need fixing?

Holy shit, long speech.

neanderthalsis4:57 pm 11 Apr 08

A group called Anonymous are pretty active against the Scientologist and some of their droogs had a protest outside the Scientology hall/church/Thetin-spaceship-landing-ground at Woden a few months ago.

For a religion that was started by a science fiction writer as a joke, they seem to have developed quite a following.

Tom Cruise IS God.

There’s a video on YouTube from the Canberra one last time it happened:


From the looks of the video there were at least two people there!

I might make an appearance. I’m still sore about my ‘Free Personality Test.’

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