31 March 2009

RIP Damian

| Pommy bastard
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At Cook shops today I came upon a bunch of flowers, and a sad note informing customers that Damian Caesar has passed on suddenly.

For those of you who didn’t know him, Damian was a quite profoundly disabled chap, who used to sell lollies and other items outside Cook shops, to raise funds for the ACT “Boccia” team, (a sport for the wheelchair bound.)

Despite his disabilities, Damian was always happy and chatty, and regulars users of Cook shops, would always stop and pass the time of day with him when he was outside.

I will miss his cheery; “Alright matey!?” when I go down there. He was a decent chap, and the world has lost a colourful character.

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“Alright matey!?!”

Can’t believe it’s been a year.

Pommy bastard11:16 am 31 Mar 10

Down at Cook shops this morning there was a bunch of flowers and a note marking the anniversary of Damian’s passing. Thanks to his parents for the reminder.

“Alright matey!?!”

Hells_Bells746:55 pm 08 Apr 09

Or laughing even!

Hells_Bells746:54 pm 08 Apr 09

Bloody Oath!

Look to the kids, disgusting levels of fun and energy, who wouldn’t be smiling to be one lol.

Hells_Bells74 said :

What a remarkable man, I knew he was special but he never let on his struggle ever.

How brave! … It takes a lot of courage to choose to be cheerful in the face of hardship, and to choose to enjoy life.

You can walk into a room of people and so many are unsmiling.

I heard the other day that children laugh about 400 times a day and adults something like eight times.

I think that’s what’s sad. I am pretty sure I would laugh 400 times a day. It sounds like Damian would have also.

Hells_Bells744:30 pm 08 Apr 09

I’m glad you guys can still feel his spirit there though. Next time I’m at the pool tables at the club I’m sure I’ll feel him sneaking up on me.

Hells_Bells744:06 pm 08 Apr 09

p1 said :

You know, everytime I go to Nick’s (Cook shops) now, and see that space where Damian used to sell his wares, I have to say a quiet “Alright matey!”, he’s still there in spirit.

I have been doing the same thing

🙂

Could imagine that spot at Cook shops seeming hollow alright.

My son saw his card from the funeral this afternoon with the story of his life and pics and asked me more about Damian and to read it to him and I did (while he pretended to take it in and watch play school) and although I enjoyed reading it aloud it was really really hard (choked up whole time)and I don’t know how his family got through that day. What a remarkable man, I knew he was special but he never let on his struggle ever. Find myself thinking of him often.

You know, everytime I go to Nick’s (Cook shops) now, and see that space where Damian used to sell his wares, I have to say a quiet “Alright matey!”, he’s still there in spirit.

I have been doing the same thing 🙂

That’s fantastic Damians_Mum. I think you are a superstar.

Pommy bastard1:20 pm 08 Apr 09

I’m glad the card got there, and our apologies for not being able to attend the funeral.

The amount raised in Damian’s name is a fine indication of the high esteem he was held in.

You know, everytime I go to Nick’s (Cook shops) now, and see that space where Damian used to sell his wares, I have to say a quiet “Alright matey!”, he’s still there in spirit.

Hi all – just thought I’d let you know that we have now raised over $2,400 for the ACT Boccia team to travel to Sydney for the National championships as a result of fund-raising through my lovely Damian’s funeral!

We also got a lot of money in a card that was obviously from someone who misses him (and his shower gel!) from the Cook Shops, which made me think of you PB. Thanks everyone.

We’re doin it tough at the moment, but whenever I’m down I think of Damian and all the people who’s lives he touched and it makes me smile.

Thanks everyone at RiotACT for your support – Bye for now Cxx

I am gently sending a hell of a lot of bad vibes to wheover broke into Damo’s house so soon after his death. He has gone to a better place now but those who love him are still here and will definitely not forget such a pathetic act at a time like this. It is incredible that a city full of caring and wonderful people can still be infected by such filth. I hope whoever did took a moment to see the smiling photos of that very dearly loved man on the walls of his house. And I hope the good vibes Damo was all about causes a windstorm big enough to smack them right off their bloody feet.

Pommy bastard8:13 am 04 Apr 09

Damians_Mum said :

Unfortunately today we discovered that some low-life broke into Damian’s place and robbed him. By the look of the place they were looking for his Boccia Club fund-raising money!!!

That makes me so angry, I’m amost lost for words.

But this is not the place to express how I feel about this.

I’m glad that Damian had a fitting remembrance, and that his good works for the club, and for those who knew him, continues.

Hells_Bells7411:07 pm 03 Apr 09

Granny – So glad I was on RiotAct to have seen how to go cause I feel I couldn’t have missed it for the world. Love how the world works in mysterious ways sometimes.

Damian’s Mum – I would’ve loved to attend the club and get down and dirty with the Damo stories (I’m sure he wishes lol) my boyfriend was having an attack of the dizzy spells and my son said it was home time in his humble opinion (he was very good for the service, kept it together for his upset mum). Didn’t matter I could almost hear it all anyhow 😉

Oh and here’s to hoping that Boccia team get their smiles and stuff back to normal real quick, cause I’ve never seen a more sorry bunch. Heartbroken. Kezzie *hugs* too.

Can I just say, Damians_Mum, you’re one of the nicest people I’ve never met?

In the midst of your darkest, saddest time you are still able to look for the good, to see the funny side of life and to keep an enthusiasm for the world around you. There’s an energy and vitality about you that you don’t see every day.

You are a breath of fresh air, as far as I’m concerned. I think you should be nominated for ACT Mother of the Year.

Granny and Hells Bells – you are wonderful people. Absolutely correct Granny – we will focus on the positive – and whoever did this to Damian must know that he was looking on and is saddened by the fact that they did this to him.

But – ACT Boccia is the winner with all that lovely money to help them pay for transport and carers and accommodation at future competitions.

And Hells Bells you’re right too – Damian is with us all! Wow did we hear some great stories yesterday and did we have a great celebration of his life and character.

He he he – I also love the comment about having to stand through the Port anthem – Yep – it was so wrong it was right! He’s probably giggling again just thinking about it

Love C xx

It was great you were there, Hells_Bells74.

: )

Hells_Bells7410:36 pm 03 Apr 09

Oh that’s truly wrong! I imagine their karma credit just took a big nose dive.

No, thank you Damian’s Mum for being so gracious in sharing the mourning of Damian with us all in your time of grief.

He’s with us all.

Hi Claire,

So glad the day was so well attended and people have been so generous. That is a wonderful result. It sounds like a very warm and special day.

I am shocked that anybody would violate Damian’s home, especially at a time such as this. This is the last thing you needed – just disgusting!

I certainly hope they didn’t find what they were looking for, and that nothing precious to you was damaged or went missing.

In any case, I would try and focus on the good and let the bad go as much as possible. There seems to have been so much love and goodwill for your boy!

Love,
Granny
xo

Hi everyone – and we loved how many people came to send him off on Thursday. thanks to everyone and Hells_Bells74 – I loved meeting you and thanks so much for introducing yourself and giving me a hug.

Unfortunately today we discovered that some low-life broke into Damian’s place and robbed him. By the look of the place they were looking for his Boccia Club fund-raising money!!!

Can’t believe it – can you?!?!?!

Anyway the GREAT news – all the people who came to his funeral yesterday donated $1,230 for Boccia ACT. And we’re all so knocked out by the kindness and generosity of everyone involved. It was wonderful to see how Damian had touched everyone he met, and that loads of people recognised what a darling and precious young man he was.

Anyway, I just wanted to share the good news/bad news with you all and tell you how much I appreciate hearing from you all.

Take care
Claire x

Hells_Bells748:43 pm 02 Apr 09

True that PB. He would’ve loved the whole thing and as said there he would’ve got round everyone to say hello.

Pommy bastard8:10 pm 02 Apr 09

Sounds like he had a fitting send off, I’m so glad.

I’m sure the humour of the anthem being played wouldn’t have been lost on him Bundybear, I bet he was having his usual giggle fest at that!!

I didn’t know Damian but I feel I’m then poorer for that.

If anything this thread has highlighted to me that the people we see daily who add that little extra warmth to a day are more than just bit-players in our lives and we only really understand what they meant to us when they’ve gone.

Seems to me Damian has left another legacy – I’m going to take the time to get to know the interesting characters that make up the pixels to my own life’s picture.

Damians_mum, you must be very proud of your son. You done good.

RIP Damian.

I ran into Diane from Bocca today and she told me of this incredibly unexpected and sad news. The rest of the day has been a blur of tears and memories.

Damo was my boyfriend for two years, my Starlight brother for ten years and my sweet, silly caring and funny little friend for 20 years. I am at a complete loss as to how to put into words what he meant to me during the times we shared together, fought intensly, made up eventually and left each other smiling and knowing we were always still going to be mates…

You’re free now darling. Trust the wings you’ve been given – you’ve definitely earned them sweetheart. With all my love to Claire and the family… Kezzie

Hells_Bells747:55 pm 02 Apr 09

Had to laugh at the Port anthem, which was a first for me as I had blubbered up from when the florist wrapped the gerbera for me till then.

What a wonderfully touching send off and hearing the family speak of him, I’ve never heard a family more in touch and oh so proud.

Who wouldn’t be, I know I felt proud to be his friend.

The hardest and dearest parts for me was going up and resting the gerbera on his coffin, which choked me up seeing his smiling face just there in front of me and when I got to give my big *hugs* to Claire his amazing mum.

He sure filled up his life with everything great anticipating this day and boy he made sure everyone knew it.

Belinda xx

What a flamin’ cheek, the mongrels made us stand up while they played the bloody PORT ADELAIDE team song to send him off. AAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHH

Could just see him grinning down on all gathered, wetting himself that we had to put up with that rubbish.

Thank heavens they followed it up with “Old Time Rock’n’Roll” to clear my brain.

So long , matey

Pommy bastard9:19 am 02 Apr 09

Bundybear said :

PB Details you requested for donations (tax deductible) are : ACT Boccia, 7 Dyring Place, Chisholm, ACT 2905.

They can expect a donation, in memory of Damian, in lieu of my wife and myself being able to attend his funeral.

silver chairman6:48 pm 01 Apr 09

My only regret in this lifetime is that I never took Damian out to Carlo’s of Watson for a fantabulous meal. Of course,that would be impossible anyway.
RIP ya ripper!

PB Details you requested for donations (tax deductible) are : ACT Boccia, 7 Dyring Place, Chisholm, ACT 2905.

This post does indeed show the very best side of RiotACT. You can always count on Granny to say the right thing in a situation like this, but it’s brilliant to read the rest of these comments. There is hope, World!

That was beautiful, The Brad. How true!

Damians_mum, I hope you are being carried on the wings of good friends that can make a decent casserole and a nice cup of tea.

My heart goes out to you in every way. I have such admiration and respect. You take care, also.

Anything I can do …. Granny1963@gmail.com

Thankyou for the hugs, Hells_Bells74.

: )

You know you’ve made me cry!

The very best of RiotACT. Love you guys.

xx
Granny

Pommy bastard1:14 pm 01 Apr 09

Thanks Claire, I think the words spoken here by those who knew Damian, if only, like myself, as someone to pass a few words with down at the shops, stand as tribute to a much loved peron, we are all diminished by his passing.

deezagood said :

Thanks for that lovely post Claire; I didn’t know your son, but it certainly sounds as though he brought much joy to many people in Canberra (those lucky enough to have met him). It also sounds as though he was extremely blessed to have a Mum like you. I am so very sorry for your loss.

+1

Clair’s words touched me, and reminded me of this verse.

I hold it true, whate’er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

Alfred Lord Tennyson – In Memoriam

Thanks for that lovely post Claire; I didn’t know your son, but it certainly sounds as though he brought much joy to many people in Canberra (those lucky enough to have met him). It also sounds as though he was extremely blessed to have a Mum like you. I am so very sorry for your loss.

We always seem to lose the good people.

Hells_Bells7412:14 pm 01 Apr 09

Big *hugs* for Damian’s Mum.

Madame Workalot12:13 pm 01 Apr 09

Your loss is felt by the entire community, Damian’s Mum. I hope you’re incredibly proud.

Best of luck xo

Hi everyone – My friend put me onto you. Damian loved you all and I laughed out loud about the shower gel PB!

Damian’s funeral is Thursday 4:30pm at Norwood Park Crematorium and then we’re having light refreshments at the Hawker Bleconnen Soccer Club till 7:30pm so maybe you can make that PB

We are grateful to the entire Cook community for your support and friendship of Damian

He loved life and loved talking to everyone – all the time – everyone made him feel special and he made everyone he met feel special too.

Granny – you take care
See ya later Mateys – as my little love would have said!

Claire

Hells_Bells7411:44 am 01 Apr 09

Bit sad I’m not on the buses hardly now and don’t see many of my fave spirits as much. They are all still in my heart though and we love running into them even more now 🙂

Hells_Bells7411:14 am 01 Apr 09

Granny said :

Well, if my little girl grows up I know that there is nothing more I would want for her than to be accepted and held in affection by society the way you guys have embraced Damian.

I don’t think you will ever know how much you have probably enriched his life also.

The spirit is beyond the shell. The only handicapped are the ones who can’t see it.

I have had the biggest place in my heart for Damian for years and others especially those great group of Down’s men that shared the buses, they are too funny and regulary have me in stitches and one of them even thinks I’m his girlfriend (I mostly just humour him gently and give me a kiss on the cheek and a giant hug, but he plays up of course, but easy enough to keep him on track, but he always wanted me to come over for a beer lol) and my young son adored them.

Anyhow *hugs* for you Granny, I admire you and anyone helping raise these gorgeous souls because don’t worry they bring joy to many too.

GardeningGirl10:41 am 01 Apr 09

I didn’t even know him, not my part of town, but I’m tearing up.

what a sad story and some uplifting memories – i never knew him, but like this about riotact that some of these local anecdotes come out.

we need more of them on people before they shuffle off…

godspeed, damian.

Top bloke. Would chat with him at the shops all the time. Saw him at the Playgroups day, happy and smiling as usual.

PB, I’m sure T or one of the others would be happy to keep up the supply of shower gel if you reeeaalllyyy want it. 🙂

I’ll be happy to track some details for a donation. Get back to you after I talk to the powers that be.

Or what about a memorial plaque for the Boccia club? Or outside the shops?

Always said g’day when I ducked in to the shops. Nice bloke. RIP.

Pommy bastard6:53 pm 31 Mar 09

Bundybear, can you post the details of how people who knew, or were acquainted with, Damian, can make a donation to the Boccia club? I’ll happily make up a poster and see if Nick at the shops will give it some prominence.

In lieu of attending his funeral I’d very much like to make a donation in his name, seeing as I won’t be able to buy lollies, or dodgy shower gel, off him again.

Well, if my little girl grows up I know that there is nothing more I would want for her than to be accepted and held in affection by society the way you guys have embraced Damian.

I don’t think you will ever know how much you have probably enriched his life also.

PB, what if you just told the boss you want to go to the funeral of a mate?

What a brilliant surprise to find this post with such sensitive comments from the Riotact rabble. Damian was elected president of the Boccia club some time ago, and was easily the most enthusiastic and successful fundraiser in the club. I suspect part of his success came from his enjoyment of the opportunity to have a chat to people, the chockies and other goodies becoming merely a prop to get the conversation started.

This came right out of the blue, no warning at all. Sometimes that’s the nicest way to go though, while life is cruising along pretty well, and things are good.

My son T is a member of the Boccia club, you can bet they’ll all be there to see him off. Me too.

Pommy bastard6:29 pm 31 Mar 09

Thanks Granny, very astute and understanding of you.

Just let it out, PB. It’s better that way.

He was your friend in the way that little kids make friends. You don’t need to know names or where each other lives or what cereal you have for breakfast. You just meet each other and it’s “Hello” and that’s enough. Sort of like we all are on RA.

We have to bury little kids sometimes. We just hold each other and cry and let it out, and when the sun rises the next day life goes on and we go on with it.

I’m so sorry.

Pommy bastard6:17 pm 31 Mar 09

It became a running joke between us.

Damn, I’m filling up again…

Pommy bastard said :

*Boy did he have a hoot when my wife told him about that!

It is very noble to go to such lengths for the entertainment of others, PB!

*lol*

Hells_Bells746:07 pm 31 Mar 09

Ohhh that’s so sad. I’ll miss our chats at the Labor Club.

Hope they bury him with his pool cue.

R.I.P

Pommy bastard5:42 pm 31 Mar 09

I’d love to pay my last respects Granny, the funeral is at Northpark Crem, 4.30 Thursday.

Unfortunately I don’t think work will give me the time off to go to the funeral of “A guy who once sold me some shower gel which brought me out in a rash”*, no matter how I phrase it.

But you are right, people who struggle against the confines of disability, and still manage to keep a sunny smile for the rest of the world are a blessing.

*Boy did he have a hoot when my wife told him about that!

Life is so sad sometimes.

This sort of story always affects me quite profoundly. I identify quite strongly because of the situation with my own child, so it’s a bit raw and emotional.

Isn’t it wonderful that he was in the world, though? What an inspiring individual!

I am sure a lot of people will turn up to pay their last respects, and will be a silent witness to his influence in their lives.

Really, really lovely posts.

I was a regular buyer of Damian’s chockies.

I’ll have to check out the funeral details. I owe him one last “Hoo-roo”.

Damn, I was talking to him about what a lovely afternoon for a beer it was just a week ago. I’ll be having one in his name this weekend.

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