Radio had its heyday back in the 1950s, about the time this gem was made. But its popularity today? Well, that’s another not-so-good story. Photo: Michelle Kroll.
Have you noticed how quiet radio has become? From what the broadcasters say, to how they say it. And yes, I know I’m very old, but have you noticed how young they sound? (Exception to the rule: some overnight presenters who sound like they’re asleep or dead or both.)
Used to be that you could bank on radio to blast you awake from any sleep depth. Now, it feels like they’re the old truck that drives you there.
When did we all get so polite? Shock jocks used to rock. Now they’re just on a par with old men’s underpants.
Remember when you’d tune into a commercial station to hear some bloke get stuck into their guest because they could? How they’d hammer a villain who had been photographed stealing the pensioner’s cheque from the mailbox? With a question like “why did you steal the pensioner’s cheque from the mailbox?” Today, the broadcaster’s question would be polite, but incomprehensible: “Do you know anything about a questionable discrepancy in alleged fiscal fortitude involving a statutory authority … and a senior citizen?”
This niceness has to stop. When you hear a radio announcer ask listeners to ring in with the name of a profession that starts with the letter of the day, it’s time to turn off the radio and/or stick stuff in your ears to stop you hearing it again.
Warning: keep the ear-closing stuff handy, seems they do this letter thing every day until they run out of alphabet.
Have you heard them asking listeners to ring in with their favourite song/book/season? Who cares? The phone company used to until local calls became free. Yes, of course it makes the caller feel all warm and fuzzy, but rescue puppies do that too – and better.
But there is one exception to personal questions you should not miss(t) – when broadcasters ask: “how much did you get?” And in case you were wondering, they mean rain.
How many of those millimetres get into your gauge, bucket or wheelbarrow measuring devices. Regardless of whether you depend on rain for your livelihood or you just like to make a splash with your neighbours, don’t let the broadcaster cloud your judgment. Size does matter.
Radio, regardless of whether you listen to it via a dial, switch, button or other device, ain’t what it used to be. Technology is doing its best to silence it, while many of its broadcasters seem keen to finish off the job.
Sure it’s hard to be chirpy at 3:45 am, but why are you up at that time anyway? Go to sleep or read a book – or go to sleep with someone who has read one.
Podcasts are the go. How novel to listen to something that’s remotely interesting, be it how to achieve world peace or the latest on a Kontroversial Kardashian? Bliss.
Why would you swap that for a traffic report. Traffic? Canberra? Seriously? We get traffic on Northbourne Avenue and around the Glenloch Interchange between 7:30 am and 9 am most mornings and later from around 5 pm to 6 pm. But wait, there’s more. You can also bet on something unnecessary happening on the Barton Highway at any time of the day. End of story.
Why would you turn off the podcast to hear a radio announcer repeat what you’ve just heard on one of those live traffic sites. If you want traffic, move to Sydney – its jams are sweet.
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