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Jingle bells, batman smells….

longshanks 9 November 2010 74

My 7 year old came home from school the other day and shared this little ditty with us (it’s used to determine who is ‘it’ in a game of tips etc, like eeny meeny miny mo):

Michey Mouse had a house underneath the movies, when the movie started, Mickey Mouse farted, what colour was his gas? (Someone then says a colour, and you spell out the colour.)

Anyway, this sent me back to a rhyme we used to sing way back when I was a kid:

Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin flew away. Wonder Woman lost her bosoms flying TAA.

I’m wondering how localised these little songs are – do they belong to individual schools, or do they spread across cities? Does anyone else have kids using the Mickey Mouse one? And does anyone else remember singing about Wonder Woman somehow misplacing her breasts on a Trans Australian Airlines flight?

Not very deep and meaningful questions, I know, but thought I’d put them out there anyways.


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74 Responses to Jingle bells, batman smells….
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Waiting For Godot 5:26 pm 09 Nov 10

Another good one was the following, Sydney 1969:

Row row row your boat gently down the stream
Merrily merrily merrily merrily, life is but a dream
Row Row row your boat gently down the stream
Ha ha, tricked you, I’m in the submarine.

deejay 5:17 pm 09 Nov 10

Skipping rhyme, Sydney’s northern suburbs, circa 1985:

Cinderella dressed in yella climbed the stairs to meet her fella. Halfway up her panties busted, how many people were disgusted? Ten-twenty-thirty-etc until you were “out.”

Holden Caulfield 5:16 pm 09 Nov 10

p1 said :

What do they call port? Or is it an accent thing?

I read it as WMC got bashed for saying “port”, which if my Australian-NSW dictionary is working is what you and I would call a suitcase, a case, or even a humble old bag.

I used to, I mean still, sing the Waltzing Matilda jingle as “lying in the grass with ‘er finger up ‘er arse.”

I had a 70s-80s childhood, with time served in ACT, SA and VIC.

p1 5:06 pm 09 Nov 10

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

That, and their stupid cursive ‘r’s (and getting bashed for saying ‘port’ – once). Brandy seemed to be universal, though.

What do they call port? Or is it an accent thing?

astrojax 4:14 pm 09 Nov 10

that’s western suburbs, sydney…

astrojax 4:13 pm 09 Nov 10

a sol-
a sol-
a soldier i will be

two pis-
two pis-
two pistols on my knee

to fight for the old count-
fight for the old count-
fight for the old country

f’ cu-
f’ cu-
f’ curiosity

western suburbs, cicra mid seventies…

we also had ‘the batmobile lost its wheels, the penguin couldn’t stay’ – don’t recall wonderwoman’s bra…

deezagood 4:08 pm 09 Nov 10

dave @ #32, we had a similar rhyme in QLD; only ours was:

‘name of random child’ has only got one ball,
The other is hanging on the wall,
His mother, the dirty buggar,
Cut it off when he was small.

Our Batman vaiation was as follows:

Jingle bells, Batman smells,
Robin flew away,
Father Christmas lost his whiskers,
All on Christmas day.

Which actually makes a lot more sense noting the context introduced by ‘jingle bells’. Queensland kids are really SMART (despite all of those NAPLAN results to rhe contrary) 🙂

busgirl 3:50 pm 09 Nov 10

shirty_bear said :

… and having grown up with “fatty boombah”, I could’ve plotzed when my missus said “fatty boomsticks” one day :-\

Apparently these days when someone is going out on the razzle and letting their hair down they are ‘getting loose’…a woman getting loose meant something completely different back in my day.

davecdp 3:25 pm 09 Nov 10

I can confirm:

Wonder Woman lost her bosoms flying TAA
3 Kings rubber cigar exploding
Feel like a Tooheys
Deck the halls with gasoline

in the Hawker area from the late 70’s on.

What about:

Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Albert Hall
His mother, the dirty bugger
Cut it off when he was only 4!

Oh and i was a recess Handball legend! (in my own mind)

Woody Mann-Caruso 3:11 pm 09 Nov 10

George’s wonderful piece of lyric mysoginy reminded me of another (again, early 80s, central NSW):

Waltzing Matilda
Who bloody killed ‘er?
Found her in the grass
With a shovel up her ar5e
And she wiggled and squirmed
As her guts were chewed up by the worms
Who’ll come a waltzing Matilda with me?

The one that stood out the most was in Katherine (NT) a %u2018full%u2019 was called a %u2018lob%u2019.

In Queensland they said ‘tiggy’ instead of ‘tip’ or ‘tag’. Drove me nuts. That, and their stupid cursive ‘r’s (and getting bashed for saying ‘port’ – once). Brandy seemed to be universal, though.

shirty_bear 3:08 pm 09 Nov 10

… and having grown up with “fatty boombah”, I could’ve plotzed when my missus said “fatty boomsticks” one day :-\

shirty_bear 3:05 pm 09 Nov 10

Thumper said :

Jesus Christ Superstar,
riding down the road on his Yamaha
cops were there, he don’t care,
because he’s wearing supersonic underwear.

*bulletproof* underwear.

And we had:
We three kings from Bankstown Square
selling ladies underwear
it’s fantastic, no elastic
29 cents a pair

screaming banshee 2:40 pm 09 Nov 10

As for handball, as a service child I was exposed to quite a few variations.

The one that stood out the most was in Katherine (NT) a ‘full’ was called a ‘lob’.

And without a doubt the most skilled players I ever came across were at Wagga (WWTHS)

p1 2:29 pm 09 Nov 10

Holden Caulfield said :

No worse than the endlessly varying pub rules for pool/eight ball/whatever you want to call it.

Endlessly varying rules I can understand. Being told that the local rules are the only true and correct ones always irritated me a little.

Same goes for handball.

screaming banshee 2:28 pm 09 Nov 10

My favourite was

Deck the halls with gasolene tra la la la la la la la la
Light a match and watch it gleam tra la la la la la la la la
Watch the school burn to ashes tra la la tra la la tra laa laa
Aren’t you glad you played with matches tra la la la la la la la la

Holden Caulfield 2:15 pm 09 Nov 10

gospeedygo said :

Lazy I said :

It’s weird this post has started this week, I was have a conversation with someone on the weekend about hand ball rules on the hand ball courts were so localised and how completely nonsensical it all seems now but it was gospel when you were a kid.

Ah yes, it was pretty interesting how rules could differ completely across several courts in the one school from my experience. Me and my friends had the best rules however. Actually fair too. Good times.

No worse than the endlessly varying pub rules for pool/eight ball/whatever you want to call it.

Thumper 2:10 pm 09 Nov 10

Jesus Christ, Superstar, riding around on a Yahama, does a skid, kills a kid, his balls were left on the petrol lid was the variant sang at my school

Jesus Christ Superstar,
riding down the road on his Yamaha
cops were there, he don’t care,
because he’s wearing supersonic underwear.

georgesgenitals 2:08 pm 09 Nov 10

Glory, glory hallelujah
Teacher smack you with the ruler
Hid behind the door with a loaded .44
And there aint no teacher any moooooooooore

Woody Mann-Caruso said :

How d’ya feel
When you’re driving the bus
And you bang your nuts
On the steering wheel
(I feel like a Tooheys…)

How d’ya feel
When ya lying in bed
And ya bitch half dead
And ya balls are red
And the doorbell rings
(I feel like a Tooheys…)

Katietonia 1:59 pm 09 Nov 10

enrique said :

Holden Caulfield said :

Jesus Christ Superstar, riding over hills on a Yamaha…

“Did a skid, hit a kid, and burned his b@!!$ on the petrol lid!!!”

Oh wow, it’s all coming back to me now…

Eeeny meeny miny mo, catch a tiger by his toe, if he squeals let him go, eeny meeny miny mo. Boy scout you’re out. Not because you’re dirty, not because you’re clean, just because you kissed the girls behind a magazine!

Jesus Christ, Superstar, riding around on a Yahama, does a skid, kills a kid, his balls were left on the petrol lid was the variant sang at my school.

Pommy bastard 1:48 pm 09 Nov 10

For your entertainment and eductation, “law of the Playground”

http://www.playgroundlaw.com/cgi-bin/browse.pl

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