14 February 2007

Canberrans live longer but don't breed

| PB
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The ABS have released data that shows that in 2005 the ACT had the lowest total fertility rate of all the states and territories, with 1.65 births per woman. This means that a woman living in the ACT, if she were to experience the current age-specific fertility rates, could expect to have 1.65 children over the course of her reproductive life, compared with a rate of 1.81 births per woman nationally. Unfortunately the ACT birth rate has been below replacement fertility (2.1 births per woman) since 1975.

The good news is that ACT residents have higher life expectancy at birth than residents of other states and territories. A boy born in the ACT in 2005 could expect to live to 79.9 years, compared to 78.5 years nationally. A girl born in the ACT in 2005 could expect to live to 84.0 years, 0.7 years more than the national average (83.3).

Does this mean that you live longer if you have fewer kids?

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VicePope, I agree with your observations. I had to import the hotness from another country, due to the lack of suitable people for that close proximity action.

Just ambled into Civic. Reproduction is traditionally associated with …. errr …. activity involving close proximity to another. As a town we are (a) a bit aloof and protective of personal space and (b) totally not hot enough. I speak for myself as well.

Absinthe Drinker Gaz ?

Bring back the lechery.

Having been happily sterile (by choice) for many years now, this wonderful extropolation of stats is just more protection from the inevitable digs people have at me ’bout my child-free status. I can now confidently point out to those of child-bound status that they will, in fact, be worm meat long before me.
As for the bogun theme, not so sure… Have seen many a debt-ridden middle class family with 3 children of late. The baby bonus effect?
I have my towel and peanuts ready too, but Thumper, could you handle the poetry?

neanderthalsis4:53 pm 15 Feb 07

As the great Bard said when talking of Alcohol and copulation:
“Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes;
it giveth the desire, but it taketh
away the ability: therefore, much drink
may be said to be an equivocator with lechery…”

Maybe Canberrians just don’t like kids…and like living until they are old…or perhaps it means kids are like a weak form of poison…

umm I mean breeding

ooo liking that recipe alot… something to try on the weekend I think!

Simto I think its why our chances of bredding cant be improved!

I’m sorry – is the use of excess amounts of alcohol meant to be improving our chances of breeding, or one of the reasons why we can’t?

neanderthalsis1:27 pm 15 Feb 07

Ahh, the talk of absinthe… brings back the heady days of lying an a paralytic daze after half a bottle of Green Fairy. Best recipe I have come across, but can’t remeber the name:
1/2 cup of apple schnapps, 1/2 cup apple cider, 1 slice of apple, cinnamon, 2 shots of Absinthe.

put cider, schnapps in a glass, apple and cinnamon on top, add absinthe, set alight, drink.

absinthe and champers is a ‘hemingway’.

well line them up – I’ll be brave and try it!.. hahaa

Absent Diane10:49 am 15 Feb 07

“Premature Sudden Death in the Afternoon”

A large swig of absinthe from the bottle

trust me it’s worse with the bubbles in the champers acting as an accelerated delivery system (the pressure forces the booze out of your stomach faster than it would otherwise and into the alcohol absorbing bowel)

and yes, very much like “being hit with a large gold brick wrapped in a slice of lemon”

“Sudden Death in the Afternoon”

Shot of absinthe minus the champagne.

…but is it like being hit with a large gold brick wrapped in a slice of lemon?

“Death in the Afternoon”

Shot of absinthe in a glass of champagne, very accurately mimics the effect of the PGGB. Trinity used to make them.

My towel, at least the one I intend to take with me on interstellar voyages, is currently located on the top of my workbench in my garage.

I am a smart guy – My towel (the one I wish to take) does many things.

Absent Diane10:30 am 15 Feb 07

Do you know anywhere I can get me a good Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster?

Ahh, Thumper. There’s a man who really knows where his towel is.

Where is it now, smart guy.

Space exploration is predicated on the desperate hope that we won’t meet aliens out there.

Anyway, plenty to be done just in this solar system before worrying about the interstellar route, most deep thinkers seem agreed that whatever descendents of ours see other star systems will be so alien to us that we’re not talking about the human race anyway.

Space exploration makes no sense to me.

Most countries/races on Earth can’t get on with each other. What makes people think we will interact peacefully with aliens???

But no topsoil, severe salinity problems, sensitivity to drought, a topped-out oil supply and no hope of getting nuke plants online in less than 10 years.

Absent Diane9:03 am 15 Feb 07

Hey Mael – I agree with the space exploration, my idead for that includes an automated space explorer which stores human embryo’s and then activates them twenty years out from destination – Of course there would need to be some sort of schooling and training – or maybe by then we will be able to implant information and social behaviours.

We have plenty of cheap coal and uranium, we can desalinate.


Ralph’s blueprint for Australia has us moving to a population of 50 million over the next few decades.

Yeah well I could dive right into a RiotACT style 50-message slanging match over this, but I think it would just be easier to agree to disagree on that one.
And let time tell who was right…

Meaningless economic rubbish? As opposed to meaningless (immeasureable) social babble?

Australia having more population means a larger economy and more weight to throw around internationally (politically and militarily). Bigger is better.

AD it’s driving the world to the brink of resource exhaustion, which will in turn accelerate our interplanetary conquest aspirations.

Sorry, I thought everybody knew that…

Absent Diane3:18 pm 14 Feb 07

what is the benefit of increased population? And don’t give me some meaningless economic rubbish.

Softheads choosing not to breed because of environmental considerations are doing the right thing and consciously removing themselves from the gene pool. This is a good thing.

and assessed for human rights implications.

Standope should ban copulation altogether except in licenced premises in designated areas (like Fyshwick and Mitchell) where it can be properly monitored and taxed!

snahon – why else do you think that skyfire and summernats are at opposite ends of the calendar ?

Hospitals would complain that their birth suites were too oversubscribed if they were closer.

Zizzo: less kids likely would stem from concern for the environment and not exacerbating the impacts of population growth through rabbit-like breeding.
Of course the down-side to that is that the bogans continue their rabbit impersonations and we as a society evolve ever more bogan-like.

neanderthalsis12:36 pm 14 Feb 07

Based on these fact I think we can rightly conclude that kids make you die younger. Due the the burden that having children places on our already over stretched underfunded health system Chairman Stanhope of the Peoples Republic of Canberra should move to ban all copulation for reproductive purposes. We would all live longer and the savings made on not needing to run schools (we have already solved that one)and health services for the young would be astronomical. As big Sam K says; “you know it makes sense.”

I assume Canberra has lower birth rates due to there be more working women here than in other cities. Plus there is probably less families with 4+ kids.

so what are the reasons for the big bogan breeding bonanza ?

every society needs a caste that looks after our poo. In canberra it is the bogan.

good no kiddies for me then!.. hahaa

I wonder how many children are born approx 9m after Summernats ?

Indeed, bogans do breed more than others, and not just to one partner. A study should be done.

VYBerlinaV8_now with_added grunt10:27 am 14 Feb 07

I think bogans generally breed more than others, and Canberra has less than the average proportion of bogans.

Pretty sure I’d be a fitter healthier person if not for the kids…

….unless you are a kid who was operated on with unsterilised equipment by Canberra Hospital in the last 10 years????

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