ArtsACT offering up poetry prize

bundah said :

johnboy said :

wrote that yourself?

That’s as original as ‘There once was a man from Nantucket’

Yeah true. It’s an oldie but a goodie!

I’m guessing the Bumblebee of Ainslie is more into pooetry…

In Memory of the On-Road Cyclist.

The bell of death does so loudly toll
for those who fail to listen to warnings
and who foolishly dare to ride along
the green lanes of death of Canberra

The sound of bone being crushed
beneath the wheels of Hilux or Triton
the pitiful screams of pain and terror
and the smell of warm blood on asphalt
makes the flouro-wearing tradies laugh
at the sight of torn and tattered lycra

Your soft tubes of hydro-formed aluminium
are no match for registered road vehicles
as the wheels of progress roll ever onwards
towards eternal peak-hour and a warming globe

So to all my dear cycling friends
I say “stay off the roads of doom”
“ride the safe shared paths instead”
and you shall forever live a life of bliss
– unless you fail to heed Zan’s advice
to loudly ring your bell as a warning
to those who against better advice
wander all over shared paths of danger

How about a haiku?

Hark to the poets!
But the rules were sensible
Masquara’s upset.

There is this bloke from Bundah
Who loves to go down under
He’s got a sharp tongue
And reckons he’s hung
Now that’ll make ya chunder

Gotta be in it to win it!

gentoopenguin said :

There once was a woman from Ealing /
who had a peculiar feeling /
she lay on her back /
and opened her crack /
and pissed all over the ceiling.

Done deal.

Where’s my $5,000?

Way to stay classy. :-/

There once was a man from inner North
Who’d locally proven his worth
He’d sneak to the neighbour’s
With the fruits of his labors
And would open his bowels and spew forth

Split the winnings?

gentoopenguin said :

There once was a woman from Ealing /
who had a peculiar feeling /
she lay on her back /
and opened her crack /
and pissed all over the ceiling.

Done deal.

Where’s my $5,000?

That is the most crass comment I have ever seen on RiotACT. I no other option than to try and better it…

“There once was a man from Nantucket…”

For those who are interested, I will reveal the remaining five lines for $1000 per line

johnboy said :

wrote that yourself?

That’s as original as ‘There once was a man from Nantucket’

There once was a woman from Ealing /
who had a peculiar feeling /
she lay on her back /
and opened her crack /
and pissed all over the ceiling.

Done deal.

Where’s my $5,000?

What’s to stop you from just not using carriage returns? Is there a set line width? How many characters? You could always claim that using “carriage return line feed” ASCII cramped your artistic integrity for electronic submissions.