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Bullying at Kingsford Smith “super” School

Genie 3 March 2010 49

I just want to revisit a post from July 2009 in regards to the bullying at Kingsford Smith School.

I don’t have children – but I have nieces and cousins and friends with kids who go there and all I ever hear about is how bad the bullying is.

My twin nieces are quite often too scared to even go to school, one incident she was pushed down a flight of stairs and suffered a concussion. My neighbour recently pulled her sons out of the school (and is home schooling them) after one had his nose broken in class. And only yesterday I heard that my cousin was beat up (his very first day at the school) because he was half the size of the rest of his yr 7 boys.

The school doesn’t seem to care, and I am looking at going over the school’s head to the Education Minister. I’m looking to hear from parents who have children attending this school and if they have any problems in relation to bullying.

I am sick of listening to my nieces crying their eyes out after school most days and telling me what has happened and need to take action. Suggestions and help would be greatly appreciated.


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49 Responses to Bullying at Kingsford Smith “super” School
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ScrappyKat ScrappyKat 10:32 am 12 Mar 10

I’m willing to work with any other parents who have true concern over bullying in schools. This should cover all schools not just Kingsford Smith, although we can start there. I’ve written to Stanhope about getting assistance, we will see if anything comes out of that.

I really do believe that the answer is working with building the esteem and skills of the targets than the bullies. If everyone else is stronger than the bullies they are going to look stupid when they attempt something aren’t they.

I also thought that perhaps there could be an anonymous “Dob in a bully” program that the schools could use.

housebound housebound 5:46 pm 11 Mar 10

Genie said :

After discussion at the P&C meeting the other night, I have heard that some of the bullying is so severe child protective services will be now getting involved.

I hope this may rectify some of the issues the minority of students are facing.

So do the rest of us. It doesn’t sound good.

Genie Genie 4:26 pm 11 Mar 10

After discussion at the P&C meeting the other night, I have heard that some of the bullying is so severe child protective services will be now getting involved.

I hope this may rectify some of the issues the minority of students are facing.

Gerry-Built Gerry-Built 5:31 pm 08 Mar 10

I still remember the day the bullying stopped for me at school. Bad morning, got onto the bus, and Mr cool-shit up the back of the bus made some stupid put-down. I marched purposefully up the back of the bus, picked him up by the collar and told him I wouldn’t take his shit anymore and threw him back into his seat. He, and his mates remained quiet toward me for the remaining 18 months of school. The bus driver ignored the whole thing, I think he was that sick of Mr cool-shit too…

Bullied kids need to regain a sense of empowerment that has been stripped from them – help them get it any way you can. Self defence classes are an obvious one, but whatever you can do. Perhaps the school should be ‘encouraged’ to run free self-defence classes for identified students – the Principal has a discretionary fund.

There are way too many kids being raised by druggies, thugs, mentally ill, and criminals these days… Most of those don’t give a hoot what their kids do at school. And their answer to ‘problems’ at home is probably questionable at best. Troubled kids = troubled homes. One student I have problems with has a nightly rum and coke and cigarette with ‘dad’, others have fond memories of helping mum and dad cut and bag the buds on the dinner table… those kids are never going to be ‘normal’.

ScrappyKat ScrappyKat 9:43 am 08 Mar 10

This is what I was suggesting a committee take control of. Build the self esteem of the kids being bullied, teaching them techniques to rebutt them. Forget the bullies, they will always be bullies, but you can build up a child to defend themselves.

Confront the government and find out why they aren’t allowing teaching and admin staff any control over the bullies. If there are enough kids out there that are stronger than the bullies, it would have to slow things down somewhat.

lucym lucym 11:59 pm 07 Mar 10

by the way, your girls would not be encouraged to ‘kick the ….. out of people’ but would learn how to defend themselves. I think it is also useful for defence when they start going out at night alone.

lucym lucym 11:48 pm 07 Mar 10

Rottweiler

I’m so sorry to hear of the problems your daughters are experiencing. No child should be afraid to go to school.

My daughter was bullied in y7 last year at a private school. Everytime there was an incident I recorded it in an email to the school to build a record if needed. The school did a great job (unlike yours) and helped to resolve the problem but the impact on her was still profound. She received counselling – perhaps something you should demand from your school. The counselling should be free and it gives the children strategies to use for themselves. My daughter has also started martial arts and loves it. KMAA in Belconnen gives two free lessons to see if the children like the lessons.

Sorry I don’t have any suggestions for what to do if the school isn’t taking responsibility.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

harvyk1 harvyk1 6:15 pm 07 Mar 10

ScrappyKat said :

So Harvyk1, if the P&C formed a Bullying Committee, to work with the school, the board and even the Department of Education, you dont believe that it would in the long run achieve anything?

No, not really.

You understand why not you need to understand the bullies themselves.

They know that violence (or mental manipulation) causes fear, and thus gives them control.
They know that teachers oftan have no power to stop them, especially outside of school hours.
They only pick weak targets, they know that if they pick someone who is strong they could lose face and become a target themselves. (seen it happen)
They know right from wrong, and yet do not care. (So go ahead and make all the rules and regs you like, the bullies will continue to ignore them all)

What the P&C would need to do is be able to give teachers the rights and authority to take the bullies on. The problem with that is name a time in history where bullies haven’t existed?

This is why I am suggesting that even rottweiler’s girls learn some degree of self defense. It doesn’t help the next target on the bullies list (unfortuantly a bully will always have someone else on the list), but it does help the girls who are the subject of this thread.

jmac jmac 1:47 pm 06 Mar 10

vg said :

“My daughter is only 17 months, and even today when i took her to a indoor playground, there was a little boy (about 2) who was constantly in every other child’s face and pushing them over or trying to run them over with the toy cars.”

Jesus, welcome to parenthood. One day your child may be completely well intentioned and do the same thing, but because a 2yo pushes another similiarly aged child they are going to become a bully.

Great extrapolation.

I know kids that went through a ‘biting’ process when young. Rather than turn into cannibals they went on to become successful business people with staff who love thenm.

Thank you for this insightful response vg. I’m actually not that stupid to think that kids don’t push each other around. Where i have the issue is that the children are supposed to be supervised and when a child is constantly ruining it for the other children, a responsible parent should possibly remove their child from there? If it was my child i would. The staff member had to ask the child to go…a 2 year old?! You think they listened?!

Maybe my values and common decency are wrong?!

rottweiler rottweiler 10:57 am 06 Mar 10

The advice given in this post is good and bad fed back for me.
Some say get the “bully’s” address and strongly talk to parents about their child’s behavior, down side to that is firstly the parent knows exactly what the child is doing but can’t seem to get through to him so something, So I would love to give it to the parent but I run the risk of being put up on some kind of assault charge myself which doesn’t help my kids or show a good way of dealing with it.

Join the P&C and get on the anti bulling committee, I also have heard this committee was attempted last year many parents stuck their hand up for the job but it didn’t get off the ground due to lack of teacher support. I’m on the bloody P&C I give as much time and effort as i can to the school and lately I don’t seem to be enjoying it as I don’t feel alot of support from school or P&C.

Get my kids into a self defense class, as i said before yes a great idea if that’s what my GIRLS wanted to do, but they didn’t and now they do why so they can in their words learn how do kick the shit out of people who hurt them, sorry but this is not the answer I’m looking for for my girls learning to fight violence with more violent plus the kid will just move on to his next victim great for my girls but what about the next kid.

What I want and many other parents I’m sure is for their child/ren to be able to attend school feel it’s a SAFE environment where they can learn and enrich themselves have fun ETC ETC, NOT live in fear having to seek hiding places, come home crying ETC ETC this has had A major impact on our families lives.

So now I’m asking how do we get the school/s on board to help keep our kids SAFE.

housebound housebound 8:05 am 06 Mar 10

Trouble is, the people doing the bullying might not comply with whatever the P&C wants. And @harvyk1, P&Cs are rather like committees all over the world – some are really good, and some are filled with the type of people you suggest.

goose goose 6:46 am 06 Mar 10

Send your kids to taekidokai. http://www.taekidokai.com/
My son loves it (7 years old) and has been at for 1.5 years.

vg vg 1:19 am 06 Mar 10

“My daughter is only 17 months, and even today when i took her to a indoor playground, there was a little boy (about 2) who was constantly in every other child’s face and pushing them over or trying to run them over with the toy cars.”

Jesus, welcome to parenthood. One day your child may be completely well intentioned and do the same thing, but because a 2yo pushes another similiarly aged child they are going to become a bully.

Great extrapolation.

I know kids that went through a ‘biting’ process when young. Rather than turn into cannibals they went on to become successful business people with staff who love thenm.

ScrappyKat ScrappyKat 8:14 pm 05 Mar 10

harvyk1 said :

MissPeaches said :

I wonder if people are deliberately ignoring the P&C recommendations as it just reeks of effort….

No, the P&C recommendation IMHO is not worth it because P&C’s are more interested in creating committees and making people feel important than actually taking on anything of value.

Also teachers are held back by laws which the P&C have no control over.

So Harvyk1, if the P&C formed a Bullying Committee, to work with the school, the board and even the Department of Education, you dont believe that it would in the long run achieve anything?

harvyk1 harvyk1 4:52 pm 05 Mar 10

MissPeaches said :

I wonder if people are deliberately ignoring the P&C recommendations as it just reeks of effort….

No, the P&C recommendation IMHO is not worth it because P&C’s are more interested in creating committees and making people feel important than actually taking on anything of value.

Also teachers are held back by laws which the P&C have no control over.

jmac jmac 2:52 pm 05 Mar 10

rottweiler said :

Harvyk1- thanks for the tip but I don’t belivie my GIRLS should have to learn self defense in order to defend them selfs against little shits at school yes it’s a great idea if that what they want to do as an activity outside of school but they wanted to do dancing and our budget can’t cover 2 things.

I never did martial arts at school but i do agree to a certain extent that it might be a good option for some children. I did however play a lot of sport and that gave me the self confidence to ignore bullying.

I was lucky however and i never was really bullied. The few times that the usual school bully would try anything, i just ignored them or stood up for myself and they very quickly backed away. I was also never a bully because my parents taught me values such as treat others how you would like to be treated. And i knew i didn’t want to be threatened or beaten up!

This is just a generalisation, but most bullies tend to come from disruptive family environments and they are picked on by older brothers or sisters or even the parents. If they’re learning that at home, of course they’re going to practice it at school.

My daughter is only 17 months, and even today when i took her to a indoor playground, there was a little boy (about 2) who was constantly in every other child’s face and pushing them over or trying to run them over with the toy cars. The big thing i noticed, was that his mother or father were nowhere to be seen. So i had absolutely no problems in telling him off as he was ruining it for every other child.

I’m yet to experience my child being at school but it worries me that the schools tend to be so lenient. When i was at school, the penalties were quite harsh for bullying and the bullies were, at the end of the day, worried about getting into trouble. Now they seem to just yell back obscenities to their teachers!

It is definitely one thing that worries me but bullying has always been around and it will continue to. We just need to ensure that we teach our children the right values and respect for others. And i would like to think that my child…soon to be children…have the confidence to speak to me as a parent so i can help them, instead of bottling all up inside. And then when it occurs i’ll work out what to do then!!

Monster of the Deep Monster of the Deep 1:48 pm 05 Mar 10

trevar said :

I know when my kids get picked on I try to remind myself; ‘what doesn’t kill them makes them stronger’, which is what I appreciate about being a victim of bullying for my eleven years at school.

It’s good that you remained stable after your experiences, but you should also consider that bullying can destroy a person’s adult life by instilling social phobia and depression. Don’t brush off things like this with your children, because it can affect them differently than it affected you.

MissPeaches MissPeaches 12:51 pm 05 Mar 10

I wonder if people are deliberately ignoring the P&C recommendations as it just reeks of effort….

Pommy bastard Pommy bastard 11:32 am 05 Mar 10

Ermmm Jim I think you’ll find it was me who started the “riling up” by posting in my normal “tongue in cheek OTT” manner..

Bless… 😉

Jim Jones Jim Jones 10:12 am 05 Mar 10

Pommy bastard said :

That’s good Jim. Then we agree that as parents we should take a pro-active role (but you do not express such extremes as myself) in tackling bullying, and not wait for someone to “do something about it” while the child suffers.

Hell yeah we’re in agreement on that point.

I’m very wary of anyone rushing into ‘confronting’ other parents while the blood is rushing to their heads. Obviously when kids are involved everyone is very emotional. Approaching the parent of a child who is engaged in bullying with the assumption that they’re some sort of bully themselves is a pretty dangerous way to go about it. Often enough the parents involved won’t have any idea what’s going on, and parents can be notoriously bad at entertaining the idea that their children are involved in anything untoward. It’s a difficult subject to talk about without becoming aggressive or overly confrontational.

Also, I do get a kick out of riling you up.

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